maskormods: (⒉)
mask or menace mods ([personal profile] maskormods) wrote in [community profile] maskormenace2016-01-20 05:53 pm

JANUARY 20TH, 2016

THE MAJORITY REPORT: JANUARY 20TH, 2016

IMPORTED LUXURY CARS!
As seen in local and national newspapers via press release:
Kitty Jones's auto shop, formally owned by the flirtatious imPort Knock Out, is now locally known to fix up high-tech, luxury cars for sale to wealthy natives. But here's the twist: Jones is donating the proceeds to the city of Heropa to fund public transportation, a dedication designed to help those in need of reliable and affordable transportation. Employees Adam and Saya (as seen in most photos of the Kitty Jones Auto Shop) aid in this noble endeavor. It is a bright spot amidst the news reel yet to come.

Plans to name a bus line after Kitty Jones (and two buses after her employees) are pending.

HOLY MOSCOW, BATMAN!
As seen on Vulpine News:
Moscow boasts that its scientists and engineers have created the most sublime and capable artificial intelligence to date. The claim continues that the power of the AI is unrivaled in its technological advancement, surpassing even that of the American imPort porter.

PANIC! AT UNESCO
As seen on major television network commercials:
Reports are trickling in that INTERCEPTED WIRES from the USSR allege to have taken American weapons hostage. The Secretary of Defense has not verified this reporting. Given the unnatural power inherent to imPorts, the international community (and specifically the UN) is tense with the anticipation of bellicose advances. Stay tuned.

FAIR WEATHER FIENDS
As seen in international news reports:
The violent weather patterns that spattered over the US during the last American imPort Swearing-In Ceremony have been traced to a suspected point of origin. The pinpointed location? The middle of Siberia. Not as precise as the meteorologists would like.

EYES ON THE PRIZE
As seen on national primetime news:
Citizens in imPort cities have been enlisted by local law enforcement to help locate and track all residing imPorts. Does an imPort work at your place of business? Do you know where an imPort might frequent for social affairs? Do your patriotic duty! Help our government keep track of our imPorts!

HALT AND CEASE FIRE
As seen in the 24-hour news blog cycle and referenced on national news:
From the keyboard of the anonymous "Cease Fire" memo --

What is "Cease Fire" and who am I? The second question I can't answer. I used to work with the government, but that's not the only reason I need to keep my name quiet. This isn't about fear or censorship, but those are not concerns we can ever take for granted.

If I can use my knowledge for anything now is the time. It's my worry that war is upon us. The signs are all there, tensions are mounting at an alarming pace and the military is being kept in the dark just how serious this all is. No government is ever transparent until they need to be. ImPorts are both a danger and at danger constantly in this world, that's your place in the world. Understand that it isn't an easy job housing and meeting your immediate needs while also taking care of the rest of the country, the majority populace of native citizens here. It's hard to know how government works without personal experience, and even then it's hard to like it or accept it. But you'll have to accept that it's unreasonable to expect this or any government to change around you and you alone more than it already has had to.

Most information dating from the previous stay of imPorts has been purged or rendered inaccessible since the government changeover in 1990, so no one knows everything; unless anyone who was working then has somehow stayed within the government somewhere, but they obviously wouldn't share what they know. They have a cover to maintain.

But this is not all to say I'm a fan, those are just facts to lend perspective to the conversation. My opinion is not relevant to my message today. Like I said, I'm fixing to apply my knowledge to good use. Tell you what I know, what I couldn't before. Answer questions if I know the answers. Give perspective and advice. This seems to be the only way I can reach imPorts so it'll have to do.

Questions, comments, and other contact can be sent to CEASEFIRE@CCHEROPA.GOV. I will respond the 20th of each month.

So long for now.

CODE SWITCH
The Homeland Security Advisory System has moved from STYGIAN BLUE to TWILIGHT because while it might be dark now, hope for dawn springs eternal.

WANT TO SUBMIT TO THE MAJORITY REPORT?
The Majority Report comes out the 10th and 20th of every month. You may find details and submit here. The cut-off time is 12:01 AM PST on the 9th and the 19th for the corresponding dates.
knifecollecting: (Yeah and I'm a pretty princess)

AUDIO

[personal profile] knifecollecting 2016-01-21 02:05 am (UTC)(link)
Tracking us using natives now too? I thought that's what the nanites were for, for fuck's sake.

[A sigh.]

Are these security levels really supposed to be encouraging?
governorkang: (o rly bozak)

Permavid

[personal profile] governorkang 2016-01-21 03:44 am (UTC)(link)
Unless something is interfering with them.
knifecollecting: (I can feel their eyes watching)

Permavoice

[personal profile] knifecollecting 2016-01-21 04:04 am (UTC)(link)
[Jo isn't really paying attention to her device, so she stays on audio. That also explains the reason that she doesn't react to Kang's appearance.]

Who? The Russians?
governorkang: (Neutral)

[personal profile] governorkang 2016-01-21 04:31 am (UTC)(link)
[His voice is definitely too deep to be human.]

Possibly.

Or I could be giving the US government too much credit with the nanites.
knifecollecting: (You what-?!)

[personal profile] knifecollecting 2016-01-21 04:32 am (UTC)(link)
Having the Russians interfering with them is a lot of faith in the Russians too. [Jo knows more of Russia from her world, and she's not that impressed with either version of Russia.

Still, she finally looks at her phone and-]


Are you a lizard?

(no subject)

[personal profile] governorkang - 2016-01-21 05:55 (UTC) - Expand

(no subject)

[personal profile] knifecollecting - 2016-01-22 00:26 (UTC) - Expand

(no subject)

[personal profile] governorkang - 2016-01-22 05:53 (UTC) - Expand

(no subject)

[personal profile] knifecollecting - 2016-01-22 05:56 (UTC) - Expand

(no subject)

[personal profile] governorkang - 2016-01-22 06:11 (UTC) - Expand

(no subject)

[personal profile] knifecollecting - 2016-01-22 21:11 (UTC) - Expand

(no subject)

[personal profile] governorkang - 2016-01-28 06:48 (UTC) - Expand

(no subject)

[personal profile] knifecollecting - 2016-01-28 16:08 (UTC) - Expand

(no subject)

[personal profile] governorkang - 2016-01-29 06:57 (UTC) - Expand

(no subject)

[personal profile] knifecollecting - 2016-01-29 07:05 (UTC) - Expand
timecapture: rpicongallery on Tumblr ([What] Hipster senses tingling)

[text]

[personal profile] timecapture 2016-01-21 02:05 am (UTC)(link)
So now we're being tracked, AND there's a war on?

[Max is not impressed. Actually, she's a bit terrified.]
rathercommon: (ummm whatever though)

text

[personal profile] rathercommon 2016-01-21 02:11 am (UTC)(link)
Donations welcome!!
-Kitty


[ And Jesus, that's a horrible batch of news otherwise, isn't it... ]
resipiscent: (melancholy so please tell me you're joki)

[personal profile] resipiscent 2016-01-21 03:47 am (UTC)(link)
Am I on pizza duty again?

[It's not the time for jokes, really, but he needs some kind of distraction.]
rathercommon: (reluctantly amused)

[personal profile] rathercommon 2016-01-21 03:49 am (UTC)(link)
Too right you are. Keep it up, though, and you'll get a bus named after you too I think.
resipiscent: (smile)

[personal profile] resipiscent 2016-01-21 03:52 am (UTC)(link)
'Rikubus' is the stupidest name I've ever heard. It's perfect.

(no subject)

[personal profile] rathercommon - 2016-01-21 04:03 (UTC) - Expand

(no subject)

[personal profile] resipiscent - 2016-01-21 04:06 (UTC) - Expand

(no subject)

[personal profile] rathercommon - 2016-01-21 04:08 (UTC) - Expand

(no subject)

[personal profile] resipiscent - 2016-01-21 04:10 (UTC) - Expand

(no subject)

[personal profile] rathercommon - 2016-01-21 04:14 (UTC) - Expand

(no subject)

[personal profile] resipiscent - 2016-01-21 04:25 (UTC) - Expand

(no subject)

[personal profile] rathercommon - 2016-01-22 15:38 (UTC) - Expand

(no subject)

[personal profile] resipiscent - 2016-01-22 23:10 (UTC) - Expand

(no subject)

[personal profile] rathercommon - 2016-01-23 01:37 (UTC) - Expand

(no subject)

[personal profile] resipiscent - 2016-01-23 01:38 (UTC) - Expand

(no subject)

[personal profile] rathercommon - 2016-01-29 20:10 (UTC) - Expand

(no subject)

[personal profile] resipiscent - 2016-01-30 02:42 (UTC) - Expand

(no subject)

[personal profile] rathercommon - 2016-01-30 18:09 (UTC) - Expand

(no subject)

[personal profile] resipiscent - 2016-01-31 05:58 (UTC) - Expand

(no subject)

[personal profile] rathercommon - 2016-01-31 15:47 (UTC) - Expand

(no subject)

[personal profile] resipiscent - 2016-02-01 00:55 (UTC) - Expand

(no subject)

[personal profile] rathercommon - 2016-02-05 15:35 (UTC) - Expand

(no subject)

[personal profile] resipiscent - 2016-02-06 00:35 (UTC) - Expand
mammal_robot: (Proceed)

Audio

[personal profile] mammal_robot 2016-01-21 02:42 am (UTC)(link)
Track me if you want. I've never tried to hide who or what I am or what I'm doing.
hypnotherapy: i do what i can ([h] i see you hurting)

permatext

[personal profile] hypnotherapy 2016-01-21 02:49 am (UTC)(link)
'Sublime and capable artificial intelligence'? I know where this is going. [ If you raise an AI to be a megalomaniac perfectionist THAT'S ALL IT'S GONNA KNOW, RUSSIA ]
bindsthedead: (curious)

permatext

[personal profile] bindsthedead 2016-01-21 02:58 am (UTC)(link)
Capable at what? And considering how little we've seen of the Porter's AI, how can they say theirs is better?
hypnotherapy: ([h] vilify)

[personal profile] hypnotherapy 2016-01-21 03:14 am (UTC)(link)
Destruction, most likely.

They can say it because they're bragging about it. It's a challenge. They're using a sentient being to show off.
[ HE'S NOT BITTER okay he's bitter. ]
bindsthedead: (art-cause for concern)

[personal profile] bindsthedead 2016-01-21 03:35 am (UTC)(link)
If this isn't more puffery, like their claims of having Lachesis.

But if that's what they're doing... I'm not sure how much better the Americans would treat a non-imPort AI, but it might be better than the Russians.
megabytes: (pic#9886915)

[personal profile] megabytes 2016-01-21 03:01 am (UTC)(link)
I have a bad feeling about this.

[And, you know, everything else in the news right now, but this one hits frighteningly close to home. THANK YOU FOR THE FLASHBACKS TO THE GOSPEL MULTIBUG ORGANISM AND ALPHA, RUSSIA, HE REALLY NEEDED THOSE TODAY.]
hypnotherapy: i do what i can ([h] i see you hurting)

[personal profile] hypnotherapy 2016-01-21 03:17 am (UTC)(link)
So do I.

If the worst happens, I wonder if we'll be prepared.
megabytes: (pic#9847634)

[personal profile] megabytes 2016-01-21 03:46 am (UTC)(link)
I hope so.

If nothing else I can probably handle it. There are only so many ways something like this can go out of control.
runningstart: (Default)

text - id reads kid flash

[personal profile] runningstart 2016-01-21 02:59 am (UTC)(link)
american weapons huh
monster_san: Look of WORKING THINGS OUT (My eyebrows and I are THINKING)

text

[personal profile] monster_san 2016-01-21 03:08 am (UTC)(link)
Wouldn't it be more proper to say a weapon has been "stolen" rather than taken hostage?
runningstart: (Default)

text

[personal profile] runningstart 2016-01-21 03:15 am (UTC)(link)
plus tracking imports

not the first time imports have been called weapons either
monster_san: Pensive (Not entirely sure)

text

[personal profile] monster_san 2016-01-21 03:25 am (UTC)(link)
Oh dear. I was afraid that was the case.

How rude of them.

text

[personal profile] runningstart - 2016-01-22 04:12 (UTC) - Expand

text

[personal profile] monster_san - 2016-01-22 04:52 (UTC) - Expand

text

[personal profile] runningstart - 2016-01-23 04:58 (UTC) - Expand
medalsome: cropped by jackets @ plurk (a serious soldier)

video

[personal profile] medalsome 2016-01-21 03:14 am (UTC)(link)
[He's not his usual cheery self, which is to be expected...]

Patriotic duty? I thought there were already records of every imPort currently brought into this world.

What is this really about?

[Weren't they always at war, technically? What the hell was going on?]
thelimitdoesnotexist: (One of heaven's bored)

text

[personal profile] thelimitdoesnotexist 2016-01-21 03:47 am (UTC)(link)
you bring us in and now you treat us like criminals?
brushoff: I'M GONNA DO IT. (do you know how terrible that is?)

video;

[personal profile] brushoff 2016-01-21 03:51 am (UTC)(link)
A Kitty Jones bus line? Don't they know that'll make her even more insufferable?