cigarchomping: (4) ...buddy)
[personal profile] cigarchomping
[ Those lurking the comm the afternoon of March 9th will spot Jolly Jonah himself staring near aimlessly into the camera. The man is sitting on a brown recliner, and he's tired. It not hard to tell, especially given the pile of paper that can be seen just out of the frame and the fact that there are at least 8 stogies in the ash tray next to him. He's got a new one in his mouth right now, actually!

But still, for as tired as he looks, you'd never guess that by the way he speaks. While most new imPorts have a reputation for being rather displeased with being so rudely yanked from their homes, JJ's overall demeanor is...surprisingly pleasing. So much so, that he begins speaking at a mile a minute as soon as the video turns on. ]


Well, it's about damn time somebody recognized my heroics! Looks like whoever's doing the import thing is finally makin' some steps in the right direction, eh? I mean, just reading about some of the weirdos you've brought in before me? Glad to see you're starting to pick out some upstanding citizens like myself!

[ He taps his cigar against the ashtray next to him, getting rid of the excess ash. Some gets on the arm of the chair, but J.J. doesn't flinch at that. ]

In fact, I recommend that whoever is running this damn thing pick out my son next! John Jameson, real American hero, that one! Don't bring in my wife, though. Lord knows that I could barely stand her back in New York, can't deal with all the friggin' nagging she'd do down here.

[ Suddenly, his entire demeanor changes. He now speaks to the camera head-on, dissuading any need for tangents. He's large and in charge and everybody has to know. ]

You can call me J. Jonah Jameson! Why am I telling you this, you might ask? Well, maybe if you stopped askin' so many damn questions in the first place and let someone with intelligence speak, I could tell you! Anyway, point is, that is a name you ingrates are gonna be hearing a lot from now on. See, back where I come from, I was a pretty big deal! Nobody wanted to mess with the likes of me!

So, for all of the so-called "vigilantes" out there? There's a new hero in town and the only superpower he needs is the power of the press!

1 | Video

Mar. 2nd, 2015 07:53 pm
fastballspeciaaaaal: (Party time!)
[personal profile] fastballspeciaaaaal
HELLO! I’m a hero now!

[As stressful as stuff’s been around here lately, this little newcomer obviously doesn’t know about any of that. Among tired eyes from Feburary’s craziness she’s all smiles and excitement.]

This is awesome! I’m gonna get All The Badges for this. [A loud and unmistakable gasp!] I bet I can get my Heroic Hero badge! That’s the last one I need to get the Up-Outstanding Citizen pin. Yeeeees. Jo is gonna be so jealous.

[Ripley looks up and away from the camera, pursing her lips and obviously thinking hard. She isn’t speaking to the network so much anymore, she’s kind of drifted off into her own place.] But I need a Lumberjane leader to sign off on my badge requirements, and Jen’s not here! Noooooooo!! Maybe I could get another leader to do it? Are there even Lumberjanes here? Or Scouting Lads?

[Something jogs her memory of the camera infront of her and she looks back. She widens her eyes and addresses her audience again.] Stay away from the Scouting Lads! They’ve got zombie brains!

[She’s got another more to say on that though. So she goes silent. But only for a second, coming back with a complete topic change.]

Who wants to go on a hike!? Or make cookies. Except, I don’t know how to make cookies so, I guess who wants to teach me how to make cookies?
spidersense: (surrounded by idiots.)
[personal profile] spidersense
[ the audio is fumbly & like theres too much wind at first. its awkward & theres a muttered 'manischivetz' in the background before suddenly it gets silent like someone went inside. the voice from before speaks up, louder & clearer, with a distinct queens accent lacing her words.

the name attached to the post is jessica drew
]

... You know, if someone asked the one place I'd refuse to go in the world, I'd tell them Florida. But I guess I died and went to the last ring of Hell anyways.

[a beat. its a poor quip but shes too thrown for a loop & not to mention extremely wary of her whole situation to actually be funny. ]

It looks like I'm paparazzi here. Follow you until you... whatever. [ theres a sound like she wants to say more. she wants to see if her teams here but she doesnt trust this network & or the systems here. so she just hangs up. ]
daughteroftheoriginal: ([May] Uhh)
[personal profile] daughteroftheoriginal
[The video feed starts, and May moves the communicator a bit so there’s a better view of her, clear sky in the background. Perfectly normal teenaged girl. The ID reads simply May Parker.

What’s not so obvious is that is that she’s on top of a roof somewhere.]


Hi. I can’t say I’m exactly terrified, but I’m guessing that’s because shock hasn’t hit yet from the whole ‘kidnapped to another dimension’ thing. Even if it does have hovercars for everyone. I guess that’s cool? [She doesn’t look like she’s completely behind that statement, though.]

I’m May, by the way. I don’t know what sort of questions I should be asking, but I’ve got the feeling anything I really need to find out, I’ll find out soon enough.

[Hopefully. There’s enough confidence in her voice that she doesn’t sound completely lost and confused. In the meantime, she’s going to be on this side of anxious about everything at home; being dragged to another dimension was really not what she needed going on in her life.]

So! Different question: I heard people are brought here from all sorts of other dimensions, so do the Avengers or Fantastic Five ring any bells?

Video

Feb. 2nd, 2015 09:45 pm
runout: (And everyone is waiting)
[personal profile] runout
[ As the feed cuts on, there's an extreme closeup of Minho's eye, and he squints at this camera, like it's some sort of great mystery. After a few moments he hands the communicator to someone else, and sits back in his chair, sitting upright, hands resting regally on the armrests. He looks like he's about to say something of great important, but instead--

He turns his head and coughs feebly into his hand for a good ten seconds.

Placing his other hand over his chest, Minho stares off to the side for a moment, a pained look on his face. Finally he turns back to face the camera, chin held high, voice strong despite the earlier coughing fit. He sounds distinctly un-Minhoish.
]

There is no easy way for me to say this. Without the aid of some powerful magician, I am not long for this world.

[ There's a pause. Almost a hope that someone will step forward with an "a powerful magician, you say? Well funny you should mention that, because I just so happen..." But he doesn't have time to wait all day for someone fitting that description to show up.

Slipping back into something that sounds a little more like him, even slumping back in his chair.
]

I can't exactly leave my kingdom without an heir.

[ Holding up a finger. ]

Nobility.

[ A second finger up. ]

Loyalty.

[ Sitting up straight again, his hands resting on the arms once more. ]

Those are the most essential traits I seek. Anything else is negotiable.
luckynumber42: (oh my god don't let the press see me)
[personal profile] luckynumber42
[Have a spider-child on video! He's checking the video to see if it's working at first, so his face is huge in the video and gives him a buglike appearance, but then he backs away a little and...well, he still looks buglike, but at this distance it's more because of his costume and not his proximity to the camera. He awkwardly lifts one hand up to wave briefly at the camera. Play it cool, Miles. Cool and casual.]

Hi. Uh, I don't really know if introductions are, like, standard protocol here or something, but guess it can't hurt to make one anyway, right? So...I'm Spider-Man.

[His comm ID reads "Miles Morales", though.]

I just showed up here a few hours ago. I'm not sure if it counts when it's in a different world, but for what it's worth, this is my first time in Virginia. Or Florida--especially with all the beaches. I gotta say--it's pretty cool so far. [Y'know, as far as interdimensional kidnapping goes.

Then he falls silent and looks down a little, shifting uncomfortably from foot to foot.]


Also, um. Does anybody know how to...get sand out of their spandex?

[Oh yeah. Smooth as silk.]
unbreaker: (015)
[personal profile] unbreaker
[When the broadcast begins, the young man onscreen (sporting a perfect pompadour with not a single strand of hair out of place) tucks away a comb and reclines upon the front step of one of the government houses, presumably the one he's been assigned. He seems to consider for half a second more what he's going to say, one eyebrow cocking upwards, a strong indication that there's a question brewing, while his lips pucker in a vague showing of frustration.]

Alright...

[Here we go.]

So, I'm digging all the free stuff that people seem to wanna hand out in exchange for photographs with us and whatever, and the hoverboards are really, really awesome. That said, I might actually like these new phones even better, though? They're pretty great! Slim, stylish, lightweight...pocket size. Anyway, all that's nice, but something's been bothering me and I've gotta ask...

What the actual fuck is up with these glow-in-the-dark tattoos?

[His jaw sets stubbornly, blue eyes fixating on something that lies out of view of the camera. Probably the tattoo in question.]

I mean I know what they're for, or what we're being told they're for, but like...

Shit, is this even legal?

[Actually, he's a hell of a lot more concerned with the fact that he wasn't even asked if something could be done to his body, especially as he can't fix it. Talk about invasive. Makes a guy wonder what else was done without his knowing.]

And on that note...I'm kind of curious about this whole registration deal! Anyone got a solid argument for it or against it? 'Cause right now I'm right in the middle and uh...from what I hear, that means my roommates can put me out?

What kind of asshole would do that, though?

Anyway, that's it. That's all I gotta say!

[He reaches forward as if to turn the device off but stops.]

Oh, and the name's Josuke! [Best to get it out now so he's not repeating it a hundred times later.] Josuke Higashikata!

[Click!]
walkingballpit: (36)
[personal profile] walkingballpit
[ Hello, again, fake world. Robbie is wearing a Santa hat with a bell instead of a pompom that jingles freely with every head movement. It's December and that's how he rolls. ]

What up, Heropa? Robbie B, back in the hizzy.

[ There's not a trace of irony. He believes he has enough street cred to pull that off. Straight outta Springdale. ]

So, the Porter is still working in both directions. I tried it out personally, just for you, my fellow imPorts. All systems are a go for getting ripped out of important life moments. I left a chili dog in the microwave there; I missed Cyber Monday here. Thanks, powers that be. I don't need food or cheap movies. That chili dog was a work of art though. It had the perfect chili -frank - bun ratio.

[ The tone is a mix of disappointment and laughter. He's managing to keep a straight face, but it's a struggle. ]

If anyone from home is curious, the new president is the guy from the Dos Equis commercial. It was a total landslide. Man, you shoulda heard his speeches. Truly a fascinating man.

So further questions welcome and so are instructions on how to decorate a palm tree in Christmas lights.

[ He holds up a peace sign, but does not say deuces. There was a moment where he considered it, but elects to turn the camera off. ]

03 | Voice

Dec. 5th, 2014 09:27 am
[personal profile] outlawrain
Hey! So, uh, I got a question for you guys out there.

I don't really know much 'bout this whole Christmas thing, but I'm tryin' to learn so I wanna throw a party for everyone! The only thing I really know much 'bout are the days, so it's gonna be December 24th and 25th at the Red Branch! Which is in... uh... shoot, how do you say it? Never was good at this sorta stuff...

[It takes him a bit. You might even hear yelling about 'Hey, where are we?!' along with some arguing back and forth about it.]

M... Maurita Falls! Yeah! It's there!

[He lets out a chuckle.]

So, question is... anyone willin' to help me out? I know we're gonna need food and decorations, but I ain't sure all of what! I'm open to all help, thanks!
setright: (TEASE)
[personal profile] setright
[Behold, one sad, tiny Christmas tree sitting on an end table. It looks like it belongs in a Charlie Brown movie, the few ornaments and colored lights making its tiny branches sag. At least it's a fake tree! From the clearance section. Fetch shows it off for a second before turning the camera on herself.]

Christmas trees are highway robbery. Anyway, everyone knows the best part of this time of the year--the lights.

Make sure to hook 'em up. The more flashy neon reindeer, the better.

[PSA from (one of) your resident neon fiends.]
nitidus: (Default)
[personal profile] nitidus
Good news: ugly Christmas sweaters are a go this year. If you were in doubt that I would be without knitting implements upon arrival into Heropa ... you would be correct, but I bought new ones. Better ones. Knitting needles with a bright future ahead of them.

There will be no baubles this year, sadly. Instead there will be an assortment of odd looking cats and perhaps a jolly Santa. People who will receive an ugly sweater regardless of showing interest: Kanaya, Karkat, probably Derek Hale. Actually, if I know you, you are likely getting one. :)

Anyway, if anyone else would like one please register interest here. If you would like to vehemently show how opposed you are to sweaters (I am looking at you, Doctor F. Chilton), also reply here. (Read: you will still get a sweater, maybe even two).

Reasons you might not get a sweater: the apocalypse (again), I break an arm (or two), death or other extreme circumstances. I'm not really planning for any of the above, so it looks like we are all in luck.

03 | Video

Nov. 22nd, 2014 08:30 pm
khajidont: (Jaime - Mild)
[personal profile] khajidont
Hey, so, I got a question. Which is basically half of what this thing's used for, so I guess everyone's used to it by now.

[Jaime's sitting down in a chair in his room as he addresses the network, feet out of the frame and propped up on his desk. He raises his hand up to the screen, and it becomes clear that he's holding out a row of brochures like a fan, each and every one boasting the various virtues of various college campuses.]

I know a bunch of you guys are either in college or you're at least thinking about it, and I'm just wondering why. Not the usual reasons - of course I know everyone back home wants an education to get a job and all that, but why do it here? It'll be at least four years before most normal - [read: non-genius] - people get any payoff, and I know most people get Ported out by then.

[He puts the college brochures back down, sucking absently on the inside of his cheek as if trying to think of anything else to say and coming up empty, so he cuts the feed.]

text;

Nov. 7th, 2014 12:06 pm
redhairring: (CLICK CLICK MOTHERFUCKERS)
[personal profile] redhairring
[ at about noon today, Tattlecrime: Heropa is updated with a new article, titled "Secrets Revealed! Who's Really Protecting Our Country?" ]

article under cut. spoilers it's the public files from the misfile plot. content warning for talks about drug use, mental illness )

[ ten minutes later, Freddie posts the link to the article to the network. Hey, at least she's warning people as she...drags them through the mud. ]

Everybody might want to check this out. I'm sure it'll prove to be VERY illuminating.

(also, does EVERYBODY in some sort of 'watch over the children' position do drugs? It's kind of worrying)

xoxo, Freddie


[ ooc: ALSO, I am super up for anybody deciding to take a potshot at Freddie if you want. shoot me a pm/plurk and we can work things out. c: ]

[text]

Oct. 14th, 2014 02:16 pm
smarterthandad: (updating fyeahmisterfantastic)
[personal profile] smarterthandad
A question, which is only going to get philosophical if you insist on taking it there.

What are the methods by which someone returns from the dead in your home universe? (Neglecting trivial cases like reappearance after presumed death, resuscitation prior to brain death, etc.)

These are the ways I know it's happened in my universe. I've neglected to enumerate the examples of each or the list would be much longer:
  1. Inadequately understood alien technology/biology
  2. Inadequately understood future technology
  3. Inadequately understood cosmic forces/natural laws
  4. Consciousness/brain pattern transfer (technological, psychic, sorcerous)
  5. Other sorcery
  6. Demonic intervention
  7. Divine intervention
  8. Reality manipulation
  9. Vampirism
  10. "Zombie" infection leading to arrested post-mortem cell degradation and continued consciousness
  11. Techno-organic infection
  12. Resuscitation after cryonic or other stasis (intentional or accidental)*
  13. Mutant or other superhuman ability (used on self or others)
  14. Retrieval/voluntary return from alternate state of post-mortal existence
  15. Alternate timeline collapse/intervention
*I strongly suspect the process used here falls under this category.

I'm interested in whether I've missed something, and in finding out which universes have which methods. For example, do some have purely mystical means vs. some purely technological?


[note that it hasn't occurred to Val that "people don't come back" is an option]

Video.

Sep. 14th, 2014 08:00 pm
huitzilin: (pic#7923504)
[personal profile] huitzilin
[ the camera is placed haphazardly, like it was just thrown over her drawer. normally enthusiastic, bubbly Aracely looks distressed, like she's suddenly be left in the middle of the wilderness and doesn't exactly know which way to go. there's no path, no lantern, and suddenly she's very alone.

her head is turning sharply, her senses on all-alert. she sounds desperate.
]

Kaine is gone! Kaine is gone and I can't feel him anymore! Just like that, he was taken! He left! He's gone!

[ a painful twist of her stomach and her guts drop. she would feel ill if she wasn't so stiff. ]

He went out ... h-he went out ... [ breathing. deep breath. she puts her arms around her shoulders. ] ... he just went out to help people and he was taken ...

This can happen to anyone, can't it? They can take someone and no one knows!

[ she feels empty, like a part of her suddenly snapped out of existence. whoever might be close may feel the same choking emptiness that she does. it's a little contagious.

her voice gets small.
]

What's supposed to happen now...?
tooscience: (mammal trickery)
[personal profile] tooscience
[See a dinosaur in a vest. See a dinosaur in a vest talking. Just a normal day.]

PRIMITIVE MEAT PESTS ON THIS SORRY EXCUSE FOR A VINE/TWITTER ABOMINATION! I REQUIRE YOU BRING TO ME ALL OF YOUR CRYSTALS!

[Yelling. Definitely yelling and not talking.]

I AM NEW AND CLEARLY IN NEED OF AID!

[He pauses a moment to glance at some papers before looking back up at the camera.]

Mime? MIME IS NOT A JOB! MIMES DON'T DO SCIENCE! Have you mammals changed your mammaly words again?! Is this some hipster thing?!

I DEMAND SOMEONE TRADE WITH ME!

001 - voice

Sep. 8th, 2014 01:32 am
bioshift: (092)
[personal profile] bioshift
Hello, out there? Superboy? Robin? Kid Flash? Aqualad, Artemis-- Zatanna?
This might ... sound a bit silly, considering this place is supposedly full of um. Other heroes, but if anyone out there knows those names, I'd really appreciate having a hand in getting a hold of them.

Oh- Er. I'm Miss Martian. And while I'm majorly psyched that I'm in Florida right now? It's totally not where I'm supposed to be. I get there's a big mission thing going on but... I mean someone's got to have figured something out so far, right?

[ Ugh, hello Megan! This many superheroes in one place? If they had, I probably wouldn't even be here in the first place! ]

Oh! Or the Justice League. Martian Manhunter would be a big help, right about now... Thanks! Miss M out!

[ She's so always wanted to try that. ]
lyingheart: anonsanta, let me know who to credit! (ask | where innocence is burned in flame)
[personal profile] lyingheart
Either I have a new roommate who moved in and hid everything but my underclothes somewhere else in this house where I can't find them or I've had my entire wardrobe stolen between yesterday morning and right now.

Has this happened to anyone else? I'm open to alternate explanations. Or wringing the neck of the one(s) responsible.

[ private to Shinjiro | so hackable it's laughable; ]

I'll be late. I have to find something acceptable to wear.
sniptuck: (pic#8145651)
[personal profile] sniptuck
[ when the video starts, you're greeted to a girl! she is swinging two pairs of scissors around her pointer fingers, which is probably in the top ten of things you shouldn't do with scissors, and there's a bright smile on her face. ]

Hello, heroes and baddies, I'm Hajime! I work at the arts and craft store. You should all visit if you have free time. We're currently having a sale on yarn. [ because yarn is exciting. ]

Oh, but actually, I have a question. What do you think makes someone a hero? Or a super one? It's a riddle I need to solve! Thank you for your help, and please buy our yarn.

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maskormenace

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