tooscience: (well you're stupid sideswipe)
[personal profile] tooscience
[H'ssssk is lounging about in some junk filled room, idly working away at sharpening his claws. Gaze and be jealous of how relaxed he is mammals!]

Mammals! Have you all killed each other yet? Can you hurry up and get it over with, it'll make saurian rule much easier if you get rid of yourselves. Saves me crystals too. Don't tell me the chaos stopped for your imbecilic holiday of hearts and candy? Stop with the flowers and fornication and get on with wiping your species out!
tooscience: (nick n-nick nick nick nickelodeon)
[personal profile] tooscience
[BEHOLD! It's the great Dr. Dinosaur leaning up against a rather large fifties styled countdown clock! Why is he doing that? The world would probably be better off not knowing.]

Behold, mammals! I have taken your countdown clock and will not be giving it back! Your security was no match for my genius, and was utterly lacking for such an important item! Your calendar year is now ruined! I laugh at your disgusting weeping offspring! You mammals weren't even using it right!

[He laughs, which is very much like raptor cawing from Jurassic Park. Shhhh, don't mention that.]

Try and celebrate your stupid mammalian new years festivities now!
thebestseller: (i need coffee)
[personal profile] thebestseller
[Castle is leaning back in an office chair, trying to balance pencils across the bridge of his nose. The We Are Hommens logo is visible behind his head, and the edge of a whiteboard is visible at the left side of the screen.]

You know, I'm thinking a career change might be in order for me. Writers aren't universal, and I'm not sure how to respond to some of the letters I get. "Dear editor, which brand of smokes is trendy this month?" "Mr. Castle, you recommended this vintage whiskey and I hated it, I want a refund!" "I don't care how famous you were back home, a nobody like you shouldn't have been editor right away!" And I've done more research on prostate health than I ever imagined I would have to.

Maybe I could work as a street performer. "Castle's Amazing Origami Creations". Of course, that would require me to master my powers first... darn.

I'll figure something out. It's not like I'm wanting for inspiration here after all.
swimpai: vuvuzela (Unease)
[personal profile] swimpai
((Text;))
hello everyone! this is aiichiro nitori again.
i didn't realize so many people talked on here until now, but i don't know if i would have said very much anyway. i feel like i have a ful schedual with school and a job, plus getting sick over break wasn't fun (๑-﹏-๑)
i've a pair of questions, however! one is that i need help with something, and another is advice.

1) is there anyone who's good with animals. see, my powers are that i turn into a duck, and i'm not sure how to do that yet, but i think i figured out how!
the problem is that... i'm worried that i might be more duck-like than person-like and might fly away or something. or event that it could take a while for me to turn back.
if there's anyone who doesn't mind watching over me for a little while, i can pay you a little as well!

2) how do you deal with homesickness?
i'm from japan originally, and not a very big city at that, so everything still feels very... overwhelming.
or is it just something you get over eventually? (′︿‵。) it feels like forever already.
walkingballpit: (36)
[personal profile] walkingballpit
[ Hello, again, fake world. Robbie is wearing a Santa hat with a bell instead of a pompom that jingles freely with every head movement. It's December and that's how he rolls. ]

What up, Heropa? Robbie B, back in the hizzy.

[ There's not a trace of irony. He believes he has enough street cred to pull that off. Straight outta Springdale. ]

So, the Porter is still working in both directions. I tried it out personally, just for you, my fellow imPorts. All systems are a go for getting ripped out of important life moments. I left a chili dog in the microwave there; I missed Cyber Monday here. Thanks, powers that be. I don't need food or cheap movies. That chili dog was a work of art though. It had the perfect chili -frank - bun ratio.

[ The tone is a mix of disappointment and laughter. He's managing to keep a straight face, but it's a struggle. ]

If anyone from home is curious, the new president is the guy from the Dos Equis commercial. It was a total landslide. Man, you shoulda heard his speeches. Truly a fascinating man.

So further questions welcome and so are instructions on how to decorate a palm tree in Christmas lights.

[ He holds up a peace sign, but does not say deuces. There was a moment where he considered it, but elects to turn the camera off. ]
forcowardice: art by Owen | please do not take ([human] HFFFF)
[personal profile] forcowardice
All right, so I'm going to be honest here. I haven't really ever seriously dated until now.

I know, real shocking. That-- that would be sarcasm. I mean, what with a four million year long war, that doesn't really cater to a life of romance for most of us. Anyway. I need a bit of advice.

I, uh. I really want to do my best to impress my boyfriend. He's sweet and friendly and really, really incredible and I want to make this work. I really don't want to screw this up, so hopefully a few of you have had some experience in dating.

Like, I dunno. Date suggestions? Methods to impress said boyfriend? I'm not sure I could really do this the Decepticon way. He kinda might take offense.

002 | text

Nov. 2nd, 2014 08:40 am
5055034455: 3x02 (that guy from tv)
[personal profile] 5055034455
Ladies, gentlemen, friends, Romans, countrymen:

Pleased to announce that the fruits of my and various folks' labor will be coming to a TV near you very soon. Stay tuned for more details as we move closer to the premiere, which should be sometime mid-month. Just in time for sweeps! ;)

AUDIO;

Oct. 29th, 2014 08:05 am
forcowardice: (WAIT WHY'D YOU GET BORED...)
[personal profile] forcowardice
I'm super ready to quit this place.

I know it's not possible but I don't think I can quite focus on how done I am. I can't stay in my real body and there are people after us and the government is-- is stupid and I'm so sick of accidentally making things or p-people explode and I just...!

How the hell do any of you manage?

[Video]

Oct. 15th, 2014 10:50 am
weapabilities: (Holoform - Ha!)
[personal profile] weapabilities
Hello again. Drift here! In light of a lot of upsetting talk, I was wondering if anyone would like to go for a run with me or maybe a good sparring match? Just because this isn't my real body doesn't give me an excuse to not be in shape.

Also, would someone be willing to offer a lesson or two in cooking? I'm starting to suspect I cannot survive on frozen waffles and canned soup forever.

Thanks in advance!

AUDIO;

Oct. 14th, 2014 07:21 pm
forcowardice: (let's face it we're all tron fans)
[personal profile] forcowardice
All this talk of oh no what if there'll be a war. Super cheerful, isn't it? Real inspiring.

So let's say these [don't say meatbags] unevolved primitives [nailed it] do end up breaking out into a full on war with each other. Would you stay and fight?

If you do, I can only wonder why.
nadezda: (& / plunge)
[personal profile] nadezda
[ The bright posters of Nauru island resorts and beachside scenes in Tuvalu on the wall behind her stand in stark contrast to Elizabeth's gray blouse and tired eyes. Ambiguous messages and leaked encryptions that may or may not be a trap don't exactly call for restful nights for people like her; A Soviet spy in the guise of a stressed housewife cum travel agent who clears her throat as she moves back from the camera to take her seat in front of it. ]

Hi-- I'm Elizabeth, your state tourism agent, here to make sure that you, our heroes, have the opportunity to rest and relax between the often perilous yet essential missions assigned to you.

[ Her smile is taut, clearly unaccustomed to speaking to a machine like it's human, and she swallows nervously. ]

As you know, the holiday season is still some months away but that also means we can offer great low-season prices. Our latest promotion is for trips to the beautiful Micronesia: 25% discount for one-week holiday packages to the lovely Nauru island, 30% off for Tuvalu and, get this, 50% off for tickets to the amazing Gilbert islands.

This offer won't last forever, so stop by the counter soon or give me a call.

[ A pause as she considers what else she's supposed to say in this instance, before-- ] Thank you.

video;

Oct. 11th, 2014 10:16 am
reptiledysfunction: (frowny talking)
[personal profile] reptiledysfunction
[ for one of the few times in his life, Connors is actually using the video function. And, he's sitting in a nice little lab with a small smile on his face. ]

Pretty nice, huh? I finally got up the courage to ask about a promotion. You're looking at an actual research biologist now--no 'assistant' attached.

[ yaaaay still smiling. And then...that smile falters for just a moment as Connors pauses, regains his strength, and then starts talking again. ]

That's not the only reason I'm making this post, though. There's something that I need to tell people. It's...been a long time coming and honestly, I should have done this earlier. But, I'm telling everybody this now, while- [ while he's still got the courage ] while it's relatively quiet.

I know I've been a bit cagey about what my power is, and here's the reason why. Many years back, I tried to regrow my arm by injecting myself with a reptile DNA based experimental formula, designed to help stimulate cellular regrowth. Obviously, it didn't work. In fact, I'd say it made things worse. [ pause, take a small breath, continue on. ]

My power is that occasionally, in times of stress or high anxiety or simply even surprise, I change into this...this monstrous lizard thing. And I'm not myself. The way I understand it is my mind lies dormant--but it can be reached. Spider-Man's managed to save me by reminding me of my wife and son before. Anyway, it's dangerous. If I transform into that, I'm dangerous. The Lizard...it's killed people. And if you're a human, or what it thinks of as a "mammal," there's a high probability that it would try to kill you. So if I transform again, you've got to take me down before anybody gets hurt.

[ There's a pause where Curt scratches at the back of his neck for a moment. ] So that's...that. Not exactly a fun topic of conversation. [ said with a small chuckle, look at him trying to lighten the mood a bit. ] But it's something that needs to be done.

02 | Voice

Sep. 24th, 2014 12:36 pm
[personal profile] outlawrain
Hey, y'know, I've been thinkin' about this for a while. I've been workin' with dogs for a while and I was kinda curious here who owns 'em and who likes 'em.

Cause I was thinkin'! What if we had a group where we met up each month to spend time with the canines? So long as they're well trained! We could get treats and toys to share... that'd be cool, right? I think so!

And if y'needed help trainin' them, look no further! I'm the best there is! Love the guys more than anythin' else!

[Video]

Sep. 22nd, 2014 03:56 am
daintylegs: (pic#8081605)
[personal profile] daintylegs
You know, it just occurred to me!

I'm over six million years old.

And organics don't live very long.

And I bet the others like me aren't quite that old either. So.

That makes me the oldest living thing here! Right?

I'm your elder. Everyone's elder.

Fear me!

[This important message brought to you by old-as-fuck Tailgate.]

text (02)

Sep. 20th, 2014 04:33 pm
glitterateur: sugarplums (MY NAME IS KYYYYYYLE!)
[personal profile] glitterateur
SUMMERWEEN SALE!!!


HEY EVERYBODY the candy store in heropa is having a HUGE SALE this weekend!! we're clearing out a bunch of inventory to make room for the stuff next month so there are AWESOME deals!! you could buy a ton of suckers or gummy worms for like no money right now, how cool is that?? and imports get extra percent off!

PLUS!! if you mention that MABEL sent you (me, mabel pines!) or that you're a friend of WADDLES then you also get a neat free gift! and also if enough people say my name then i might get a bonus which would super help me afford the giant hamster ball i want

so please come to heropa and buy candy

thank you ♥!!
tooscience: (mammal trickery)
[personal profile] tooscience
[See a dinosaur in a vest. See a dinosaur in a vest talking. Just a normal day.]

PRIMITIVE MEAT PESTS ON THIS SORRY EXCUSE FOR A VINE/TWITTER ABOMINATION! I REQUIRE YOU BRING TO ME ALL OF YOUR CRYSTALS!

[Yelling. Definitely yelling and not talking.]

I AM NEW AND CLEARLY IN NEED OF AID!

[He pauses a moment to glance at some papers before looking back up at the camera.]

Mime? MIME IS NOT A JOB! MIMES DON'T DO SCIENCE! Have you mammals changed your mammaly words again?! Is this some hipster thing?!

I DEMAND SOMEONE TRADE WITH ME!

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