Actually a job might be useful. I can do whatever. My resume doesn't exist but I'm quick on the uptake.
[a few minutes of silence, and then;]
-- Introductions, sure. I'm Magnus Chase. I used to live in a hotel and next to dumpsters before that. I'm from Boston and I don't love nicknames. My favourite colours are black and beige and I know ASL/ASL. I love pina coladas and getting caught in the rain. Whoops, now this sounds like a weird dating profile, so I think I'm done.
I'm like, barely 50% kidding about the falafel/Netflix support. Not kidding at all about the job. So call me maybe.
[another voice in the background rips into a modern classic, with Magnus going aw, come on -- don't worry about it]