maskormods: (⒌)
[personal profile] maskormods
THE MAJORITY REPORT: APRIL 20TH, 2017
WAKEY WAKEY,
FOR HEAVENS SAKEY!

GOTT JUSTICE?
As seen televised on local and national news:
April 30th
Import Dr. Hermann Gottlieb-Geiszler was taken into custody late on April 23rd on charges of willful breach of government security. Details are classified, but it's a blow for the small, yet devout following of fans shocked by the news and arguing on behalf of the newly married doctor. But not only has Dr. Gottlieb pled guilty during his trial, he's offered no defense and shown little remorse for his alleged actions. Whether he's unaware of or simply disinterested in his staunchest fans is unclear.

Deemed guilty by the courts, Dr. Gottlieb is facing a two month sentence in medium-security prison, with the possibility of an early probational release on review. Officials say the De Chima-based imPort has been cooperative, but has threatened legal action against the local police department, citing violations of the ADA and criticizing the lack of official guidelines for the detainment of physically impaired suspects. So far, only a formal complaint has been filed.

"It could have been worse," Officer Reiman says. "We didn't expect to find [the suspect]. His file lists a teleportation ability and could have prompted an international manhunt. He'd had plenty of warning too-- had to get the cruiser buzzed in. Almost seems like he wanted to be arrested."

Meanwhile, imPort critics say that Dr. Gottlieb only let himself be arrested because of the unfair sentencing policies that favor cases like his. Typically, cyber crime has resulted in 2-5 year sentences for the non-imPort population. But whatever his motivations, there's no way to know for sure.

Dr. Gottlieb's evaluation is expected to take place on May 24th. His husband, Dr. Newton Gottlieb-Geiszler, could not be reached for comment.

BURNIN' DOWN THE HOUSE
As seen in HOT HOT BEAT, TMI Magazine, IMPORTED GOSSIP, and national news:
Fans of the hot yoga show "BODY HEAT!" were shocked this past week to discover the show's popular imPort host, Mick Rory, was arrested for arson. Rory admitted to setting his government-assigned house in Heropa on fire on the 13th of April, just before the holiday weekend. Rory has been sentenced to two months parole and community service, but has not given any public explanation for his actions.

Speculation is running rampant, with many pointing out that Rory had been known to offer his services to various Fire Departments in the Porter Cities, and had only just a few weeks ago had run a charity drive for the Heropa General's burn ward. Some have called attention to his little-used but widely known alternate alias "Heat Wave", and a rumoured criminal past. Fans online are split between those expressing outrage and those arguing it was a simple mistake.

As for BODY HEAT!, the producers made a public statement that they are reviewing his contract for breach of its Moral Clauses, and have since officially retired Rory from the show.

A BET-TER WORLD
As seen in local Maurtia Falls advertisements:
All bets are ON! WHO will be the next imPort arrested for criminal activity? The handsome Sam Merlotte? The incredibly loud Count Dooku? The beautiful Bela Talbot? The coquettish Yuri Plisetsky? Rope in your financial manager and/or gambling broker and put down a name, you could win it big if fate favors your delinquent pick.

(Smart money is on imPorts who are often seen wearing black).

YOU KNOW NOTHING, SPRING SNOW
As seen on the Maurtia Falls weather channel:
Bad news for people who were enjoying the spring weather. An extreme cold front is sweeping the east coast this weekend, producing blizzard like conditions for the state of Pennsylvania. You can expect to see snowfalls of up to two feet with wind gusts of up to 45 MPH. Folks of Maurtia Falls should brace for impact on April 21st. Wind gusts and heavy snow could cause localized power outages and downed trees. The department of transportation has announced that they are armed and ready with plows to clear the roads, and travel should not be adversely affected for long, but advises that drivers stay off the road if it can be avoided.

Just when you thought you were in the clear, it seems that Winter Is Coming back again.

THE DOOK OF HAZARD
As heard online, on all the best podcast-supporting websites, and discussed in metahuman-related conspiracy blogs:
The newest episode of Count Dooku’s political podcast Counting Truths features The Doctor as a special guest star, interviewed by the Count for his take on recent dangerous incidents like the attack by armies of historical mirages that ruined the last weekend of March, and the blight of apple crops rumoured to have been caused by failed biogenetic testing.

The Doctor’s interview mostly involves a lot of rambling about the timeline, attempts to explain temporal paradoxes to the casual listener, and a little bit of grumping at the government for not letting people look at the Porter. Dooku has to get him back on track multiple times but, all in all, it’s a good interview. The most important thing is that the Doctor surmises that some of the problems, such as the historical mirage attack, might be caused by a temporal malfunction in the Porter. After all, the Porter is an impressive machine but it’s just a MACHINE. It’s entirely possible the Porter can’t juggle all these timelines and accidentally slipped up somewhere.

The Count closes this month’s episode by encouraging any listeners who are concerned about political issues to speak out by contacting the imPort community’s elected representatives with any questions or complaints. To this end, he has helpfully shared the following public contact information:

Lord Petyr Baelish, imPort Ambassador for Maurtia Falls
Queen Lucy Pevensie, imPort Ambassador for De Chima
Miles Naismith Vorkosigan, imPort Ambassador for Nonah
United States Senator Mitchell Hundred of Virginia

CODE SWITCH
The Homeland Security Advisory System has moved from OF THE HEART to INDIGO-GO because nothing shakes off the sleepies like an impromptu dance party.

WANT TO SUBMIT TO THE MAJORITY REPORT?
The Majority Report comes out the 10th and 20th of every month. You may find details and submit here. The cut-off time is 12:01 AM PST on the 9th and the 19th for the corresponding dates.
pyrogue: (suits are for squares)
[personal profile] pyrogue
[ On screen is a very shirtless Mick wearing nothing but a pair of tight black yoga pants with red stripes down the side with the letters "BODY HEAT" running up one side and a towel around his neck. He's gotten an assistant to hold the comm. He's feeling very cold right now, actually, so he speaks just a bit faster than he normally would to get this over with. ]

Dunno how many of you know who I am, but I'm Mick Rory. I do a workout show called "BODY HEAT!" as a yoga instructor -- [ He smiles wryly in a "yeah, I know" sort of way. ] -- and we're doing something special starting in a coupla days. We want some guest stars to come on board and film a few episodes with me.

No yoga experience required either. Think of it as a free lesson -- that you get paid for. Just make sure to bring water. Gotta keep hydrated 'cause it's gonna get pretty warm. But that ain't so bad in February, right?

[ Mick is fine with it all year round, but he's aware that not everybody's into it. ]

On top of that, it's being tied into a charity drive to raise money for the Heropa General Hospital's Burn Ward. And since September we've gotta whole lot of new folks who have fire-breathing on us, it kinda needs it.

[ And a particular pet cause of Mick's, considering his background. But he's not advertising that part. He smiles again. ]

Any imPort's free to sign up, unless their name is Leonard Snart.

((OOC: This is more of an informal thing but def let me know if your character would get involved and if so if you'd prefer to handwave or log something about it, I'm totally good either way.))

( text )

Feb. 10th, 2017 02:55 pm
quickasever: (094)
[personal profile] quickasever
[ Miraculously, Wally had managed to keep a relatively low profile since he had arrived in this strange world the other day. But with it looking more and more like his stay was going to be a potentially lengthy one, he decided it was finally time to address the network. ]

this is some world they have here. it wouldnt exactly be my first choice for where id want to spend an indefinite vacation, but i have been to worse parallel universes and dimensions before. though i could have done without the freaky tattoo and the creepy file. i also dont think im really qualified to be a time management consultant even if i do appreciate the humor behind it.

anyway, i was wondering if anyone could help a new guy out? like, is there any sights i need to see? any hip places i need to check out? anywhere i need to avoid at all costs? and, more importantly, who makes the best burger and iced mocha around here? if im going to be stuck in this world, then i might as well get the full experience.

also, i dont suppose anyone knows what a green lantern is? they are a pretty big deal where im from.

whatever help i could get would be great. thanks.

video;

Feb. 7th, 2017 07:53 pm
marriedmedium: (feather hat)
[personal profile] marriedmedium
[For those who know her, Sadie's natural sparkle is slightly dimmer as she appears on the network today, just a touch. For those who don't, it might well go unnoticed, as her smile is as broad as ever.]

Hello, darlings. For those of you who watch my show—and I'm sure it's many of you, as you all have such excellent taste—my producers have decided to do a special edition to celebrate Valentine's Day, celebrating the wonderful thing called love and ways we celebrate it through time and distance!

[Just for a moment, Sadie glances down to her wedding ring.]

Now, thanks to my vast experience speaking to ghosts, I have the time covered, but what about distance? I can't think of any distance greater than different worlds, so tell me, how do my dear fellow imPorts celebrate love?
viced: (Curiously)
[personal profile] viced
[ The camera seems to artfully be placed on the edge of a desk. Behind the guy on screen is both an American flag, and the Virginia state flag. On the desk, at an extreme angle is the words S. 2549 ]

I know it's a little behind -- it's been a long couple of weeks since the blackout, and I meant to address everyone earlier than this, but... you know how the Senate can be, particularly at the beginning of a new session. [ A half-grin. He knows it's bullshit, but... ]

Anyway, I wanted to ask most of you who were affected the most by the blackout -- what kind of government response would you have found the most useful?

Or to any crisis, really. This isn't the first, and it won't be the last, and I want to make sure we have a plan in place to properly utilize the resources we have to make sure we all get out of this safely. Even if it's something small, it'll help.

[ A pause, and then a slight gesture. ] Obviously, I'm working on a bill, so it would help me to field the people who seem the most impacted by these sorts of things, you know?

[ He reaches to shut it off, before -- ] Oh, and for those of you who are new, welcome to your new reality. If you need anything, you can always reach out. Just because I'm a Senator for Virginia doesn't mean I'm not available for imports as a whole. I'm the only voice we have in the Federal Government, you know?

text;

Feb. 5th, 2017 05:04 pm
picksthenames: (are you sure about this?)
[personal profile] picksthenames
at the risk of being That Guy, i gotta ask: whats the deal with the job assignments for new imports? are they all jokes or is the universe just messing with me?

either way, im definitely in the market for something better. the government wasnt helpful enough to kidnap me with a resume or references on hand, so i guess youll just have to take my word for it, but here goes:

names Cisco Ramon, techspert extraordinaire. masters in engineering, second best coder on my earth. app writer, gear inventor, whatever you need. i can weld, i can solder, i can sew (leather, which let me tell you, is a bitch to work with). new to this earth so help a brother out and tell me where to look, or just offer me a job, thatd be great either way. shacked up in heropa but commutings easy with these porter things right?

so yeah. call me. been a while since i had to look for a new job, but im pretty sure my interview game is still on point.

LLAP. 🖖
infomodder: actual murder messiah will graham (jesus was also a fisherman)
[personal profile] infomodder
[The video opens on Will, in his usual plaid, with a stupid fishing hat (REEL WOMEN FISH) sat atop his head. It's old and worn enough to show he favors it, wrapped about his head with a fishing hook tucked along the bill. He's propped against a stool with a line of fake bait and various fish-y bits and bobs behind him...and a sign that says NOW HIRING INQUIRE WITHIN hung just so it's easy to see from the window outside and inside as well.]

It's been brought to my attention some of you might've been getting unasked for messages. About fish, or the ocean...anything alone those lines. [ha ha ha like fishing lines o man] Should be fixed by now. If it keeps up, just...give it a few days and it should stop.

[He makes a "what can you do" face and then looks to the sign like he forgot it was there. A nudge of his elbow makes it a more prominent focus.]

Getting ready to retire. I'll still own the shop, but I won't be working here any more. Looking for some people who need a steady paycheck and don't mind bugs. ImPorts get priority. If you want something from time to time, that's doable, too. Just let me know.

[As he goes to sign off, a furry head comes into view and gives the screen a big, tongues-out smile. Fantastic.]
socialactivillain: (084)
[personal profile] socialactivillain
[ The video feed ticks on to Piper in what looks to be his bedroom. There's a sleepy grey chinchilla loafing on his bed in the background, and a large brown rat perched on his shoulder. For once, he doesn't look like he's ready to start a fight. In fact, his hair is down and he might even be wearing pajamas? He looks comfy, at any rate. ]

Ever since I was a kid, I've been obsessed with sound. All sound, really, but especially music. And now, here I am in a different universe, with people from all different worlds with all different histories, and it's only just occurred to me that I'd never asked this before, but I'm curious about music from other worlds.

What do you like to listen to? What kind of music is popular where and when you're from? Do you play any instruments yourself? Do you play music professionally here, or even just for fun?
airshow: (Wear something slutty to my funeral.)
[personal profile] airshow
[Scene: a shaky too-close video of one James Jesse's obnoxiously grinning face. He's addressing the network in a loud stage whisper and a genuinely terrible accent that's either going for the Crocodile Hunter or David Attenborough — it's anyone's guess, because it's just the worst.]

What you're about to witness here today is truly a rare sight. Two hardened men — grizzled, some might say — in their natural habitat. Here, behind closed doors... they gussy up their plumage. Behold!

[Will Graham stands near a bed with a few dark skirts tossed over it, wearing a dark skirt himself. Fear not. He’s still got the usual plaid on top, so it’s not too obscene. He’s looking down at his bare shins as though seeing them for the first time.]

I see why you have skirts. Kinda tempting to walk home like this.

[He wouldn’t, of course. But still…]

Tend to wear them with pants.

[Case in point, the jeans - on the skinny side - he’s wearing right now. He’s not one to show much skin. He’s very much one for wearing skirts whenever he feels like it though, hence the selection on the bed.]

You gotta find the right fishy socks to go with this.

[Will cuts Len a sharp look — the sort that isn’t truly offended because he’s doing his best not to laugh. Or, like, chuckle a little. Which James figures is his cue to cut in.]

I've got about a dozen stripey pairs, if you're into that kind of thing. Ooh, or the ones with little capes on the back? Or there's always fishnet.

[Will’s eyes go wide in response, more to the camera than James. But what’s done is done. No hiding it now. He crosses his arms and looks down at his bared legs again before looking over to Len and asking:]

What do you think? Yes or no fishnets?

[Len keeps a steady gaze on Will’s legs as he considers, finally lifting his shoulders in a shrug. If being filmed bothers him it doesn’t show, he always looks like he’s posing anyway.]

Only with heels.

Then man, are you in luck.
nastygram: (C:\lenna)
[personal profile] nastygram
[The below posts to the mirror network around 3am on the morning of November 26th, the election of the Heropa ambassador.]

Greetings, fellow imPorts.

As you turn out to vote today for our ambassador of Heropa, our single sole voice of representation in this great nation, we urge you to ask yourselves: who is your neighbor?

Your vote is a empty gesture. A gesture designed to help keep us complacent, to make us feel that we have a part in a body, in a nation, that has nothing to do with us. These elections are coordinated by a government who does not care about you. These elections put into place the newest figurehead, in a series of figureheads, whose power is rendered meaningless by the very fact that we who live here have no rights. No control. We are brought here and we are taken out again.

So trust your neighbor, imPorts. They are the closest you have to a constant.

But we suggest that you trust your neighbor only if you know your neighbor.

Your candidates show one face. We show you now, LIVE, FROM HEROPA, some OTHER faces of 3 of the finest, to teach you, imPOrts, to be wary, and beware. Be wary of the rich who give from guilt, the men of means who claim to care. Beware the criminals who got off easy and now ask YOU to behave. Be wary of the cronies, the vote-buyers, the campaigners who seek not to enrich your lives but to profit, to increase their means and their research, to increase their bottom line off your backs. Beware the institutions, Big Med and Big Industry and Big Brother. Beware those who would see us as tools. Beware the socialists who would join the democratic machine. To enter into that game is to succumb to it.

To the candidates: we urge you to LISTEN TO YOURSELVES. Heed your own words and take your own advice. If you must participate in this dog and pony show that the government has constructed as a distracton, then participate by our rules, the rules of the imPorts. You should tear this fabric. You should not worry about playing the corrupt game. You should worry for your fellow imPOrts, and worry about us. We have the power.

And remember: it is in our hands to decide. Not just today, fellow imPorts, but every day. IT IS IN ALL OF OUR HANDS. You must pay attention. Don't make us pay attention for you.



[Following the text is a series of links and soundbytes, reposting the above for emphasis.]

heropadebate.wav
guiltygiving
socialistmenofmeans
gooddogbadlawyer
cronyismisaliveandwell
heneversaidno
candidateoftheinsitution
wearetheirtools
compromisedmorals

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Nov. 21st, 2016 06:55 pm
wizzardly: I think it's called being human or something. (Been completely at a loss my whole life)
[personal profile] wizzardly
Right, so it's been brought to my attention that those bloody awful reports have been floating certain rumors around about me, and I'd rather just end those before they even get going all right?

[because even Rincewind's starved sense of self-respect has to draw the line at people thinking he fancies dishware.]

So, to be clear: I'm pansexual.

[which is an admittedly backwards linguistic for declaring one's lack of attraction to tea cups and related sundry, but there's just no accounting for etymological taste.]

There? [he arches a pointed brow.] Shall I assume that just about does it? All questions answered? Jolly good.

[honestly, the people in this place really will believe anything, won't they? Lucky that Snart fellow pointed this out when he did - things really could have gotten out of hand.]

( audio )

Nov. 14th, 2016 07:23 pm
curled: (04)
[personal profile] curled
[ Greetings good folks of the network! This one is coming to you during the evening hours but not too terribly late at night. A nice time of night. And he won't be taking up a lot of time, but Dorian does have a burning question that needs answering! So, he turns on his device and his voice is playful, curious. ]

Hello and good evening! Now, I have another fun, distracting sort question for you all.

[ Are you guys ready for this? This is so serious!!! ]

What would you say, in your opinion, is the quintessential date activity?

[ Because someone's just learned what "dates" are and, surprisingly it's not a fruit. ]

[Video]

Nov. 12th, 2016 01:30 pm
plasthmatic: (It's GRRRRRRRRRRRREAT)
[personal profile] plasthmatic
[Meet Abigail Fowler. Subsequently try to avoid her? Profit, maybe.

She's sitting in her new residence in Heropa, only visible in the frame from the shoulders up, and that's plenty. She doesn't look happy - but then again, her face is usually some variant of irritated or "fight me".]


Let's do a recap: Kidnapped. Given the world's shittiest superpower. Not cured of illnesses. Put to work in a bar.

[A grin spreads across her face and she brings a hand into frame to show a thumbs-up.

This is the sort of person who might spit in drinks.]


So basically, nothing has changed for me except location, location, location. Good times.

[That hand now scrubs her face, runs back through her mass of hair, then drops to her lap. She sighs heavily, signaling a change in pace for the conversation.]

Does anyone know if and where there's a blood bank in this swampy hellscape?

video

Nov. 7th, 2016 06:41 pm
airshow: (I robbed the continental breakfast.)
[personal profile] airshow
OH MY GOD STOP WHATEVER YOU’RE DOING I HAVE WHACK-A-MOLE.

[ And now that he has your attention, he flips the camera back onto himself. Trickster is wearing a light-up bowtie over a dark blue button-up shirt, as that is what passes for finery to him. Behind him loom several bright, loud arcade games, a dart board, a plastic singing fish spraypainted gold, and — oh god, is that fake? — the taxidermied head of a crocodile wearing giant novelty sunglasses. ]

Goooood evening, my fellow Americans! Before we get too into the touchy-feely family-friendly parts of this holiday season, I have an announcement to make! The Frisky Nickel is (almost) open for business right here in our very own beautiful, muggy Heropa. But what is that, you ask? Well, that’s a darn good question! On top of obviously being a testament to the American spirit of unfettered, devil-may-care, perhaps even reckless entrepreneurship, it’s also a barcade. That’s half-bar, half-arcade, for those of you who aren’t naturally gifted at the whole smashing words together thing. It's okay, it's an art, I know.

Kids, young adults, and those of you without fake IDs: you’re allowed in the non-glug-glug-glug side of the establishment ‘til ten PM. After that things might get a little weird and I’m gonna have to kick you out. No hard feelings, I connect deeply with the emotionally immature, but that’s just the way the cookie crumbles. I’m not saying I’d consider letting you in with a fake mustache, but I might.

A-ny-who, I might need a couple hands around here, if anyone’s interested in gainful employment. Good at mixing drinks? Got fun ideas for what to do with sacks and sacks of quarters? Have some kind of mysterious other skill you think I should give you money for? Talk to me. I’ll put my job interviewin’ hat on for ya and everything. I don’t actually have a job interviewin’ hat, but I can make out out of balloons if the situation requires it. Just one of my many talents.

Anyway! Stop on by this Friday for the official grand opening! I’ll be handing out free tokens like candy, and handing out deep-fried Skittles, which are actual candy. Kind of.

002. video

Oct. 2nd, 2016 01:23 pm
hunksmash: (040)
[personal profile] hunksmash
[ One benefit of Hunk's moving to a mostly-empty house had been the mostly-empty garage. That's where he is now, sitting cross-legged in front of a still Yellow Lion with a rag and a can of compressed air in his hands. He's just doing some cleaning, mostly because it's something to do, and he works while the feed runs, propped up on a nearby tool box.

Well, wait. He gives a little wave, first, then it's back to work. ]
You know, I... I should've figured out what I was going to say before I came on here to say it. What I want to ask about is hard to put into words.

I, uh-- I've only been here, like, two months, and I've already had a couple of people I know up and disappear. So that's kinda a bummer, especially 'cause one of 'em's somebody from my world. [ No. Wait a second. ] Well. Somebody from my universe. Or from my dimension? Anyway! You get what I mean. She's kind of important, and a main driving force behind what we're supposed to be doing, and--

I don't know. I feel bad. Well, obviously, I'd feel kinda cruddy about that, but it's more than that. I'm torn, I guess? I wanted to enjoy all of the time of Earth I could get, but I also can't quite get my mind off of the fact that we're supposed to be halting an alien empire. Then there's the fact that this Earth isn't quite right, that the locale isn't exactly mine, and-- I dunno'. Pointless discontent, right? What can you do?

Okay. Sorry. I'm rambling. Uuuh... So. What am I looking for, here? Like... Pick-me-ups? Advice? Suggestions?

What's the best thing on Earth? To you. To do, to eat, to see... All that stuff.

And does anybody need a spare mechanic? The Elvis thing is starting to get taxing.
pyrogue: (suits are for squares)
[personal profile] pyrogue
[Before Mick starts the video, he links a few photographs of a very cute schipperke. Then he clicks on the video. He's in his house, wearing a black turtleneck and has a very different dog happily on his lap.]

Has anyone seen this dog? I call him Charcoal. He hangs around Heropa and likes playing with Matches here. [He scratches the dalmatian's ears. At least he's consistent about the theme naming?]

I thought he was a stray but he seems well-fed, clean and doesn’t look like he's got other problems a stray would've. But he's got no collar or ID or nothing. If he does have an owner, they sure do let him run around on his own a lot.

If anyone has any info, lemme know. Don’t want to accidentally steal somebody’s dog.

[He smiles before snapping his fingers, just remembering something.]

Oh! Should ask while I'm here -- any movies out right now you'd recommend?

text;

Sep. 16th, 2016 02:22 pm
garrick: (pic#9813498)
[personal profile] garrick
Quick and easy one for you guys.

Who here is from or knows of Central City? And if you are one of those two options, how?

Bonus points if you can say which version you're from.

I think at some point we're going to need a list.
socialactivillain: (i almost cut my hair)
[personal profile] socialactivillain
[ It's a mild, sunny day in a park in Heropa, and the network feed switches on to show a long row of whipped cream pies on a picnic table, complete with checkered red table cloth. Standing behind the table are M and Piper, and a few non-imPorts who look to be ranging between nervous and excited to be appearing on the imPort network. ]

Hello, everyone. We're here today supporting the Helping Hands, Open Hearts charity in Heropa, raising money for the construction of a new homeless shelter.

[M picks up one of the pies and holds it up for the camera.]

And because apparently the only way to do raise money these days is to do something stupid to someone “famous,” they’ve roped us into a fundraiser: imPie the imPort.

[Judging by his expression, M clearly didn’t pick the name. Piper, for his part, seems amused.]

Regardless, we've both volunteered to be hit in the face with a pie, live on camera, for every $50 raised. We're asking for your donations, and for more volunteers to come join us. There are also non-face-related pies for sale, graciously donated by United Cakes of America, all proceeds of which will also go to Helping Hands, Open Hearts.

[Putting the pie down, M smirks.]

Let’s be honest, I’m sure there’s at least a few of you watching who want to pie one or both of us in the face. Why not help out a good cause in the process? After all, We all need to do our part to help Hartley here live up to his name-- Pie-d Piper.

[Bad pun? Bad pun. Not that M cares, but Piper is covering his face and groaning.]

And if you don’t hate us--which I’m finding hard to believe after going through the trouble to make that horrible pun--you should try to convince someone you do hate to come down and volunteer. You know, for charity. Surely not for the pie-ing them in the face part.




((the video will continue to livestream throughout the event, but action tags are definitely welcome for this post!))
devoutish: (038)
[personal profile] devoutish
[There's the sound of fumbling and a little bit of unintelligible muttering before any real words are spoken - the communicator isn't hard to figure out, but it still takes some practice to get the hang of.]

-- this button here, and then-- oh, there we go. Have I got it? Hello.

[Alfie's voice is deep and rumbly, and very Cockney. He switches on the video next. It's zoomed in too close on him to give any real clues to his surroundings - there's just the back of a couch and a blank wall visible behind him - but his clothes are clearly old-fashioned.]

Fucking fantastic, these things. Looking at your little images on the screen, it's like you're really there. Yeah, wonderful picture quality. I'm very impressed. But I suppose I shouldn't be surprised, should I - bigger and bolder seems like something of a trend here. I discovered one of your supermarkets earlier this morning. Fucking hell, the size of that place. Entire aisles set aside for nothing but ketchup; for ice cream. Hats off to the future, eh?

[And since he's actually wearing a top hat, he goes ahead and tips it.

But despite his conversational tone, his eyes are deadly serious. He narrows them a little, as he peers closer at the screen. He seems calm and affable, sure - but if you look behind that front, it's clear that he is very much not happy with how his day is going.]


Right. How many people am I speaking to, right now? Is it just those who've been brought here like me, or do I also have the pleasure of the army's company?

[Because he would like to have words.]
catchacold: :) (netflix and chill)
[personal profile] catchacold
I was going to report a crime.

[The voice of Leonard Snart comes on, distinctive as ever. He looks into the camera, apparently leaning against a wall in a dimly lit room with pounding music and some flashing light. In his free hand he holds a beer, on his head he wears a pointy head that says 'Wizzard' on it, which might be familiar to some.]

But I'm not even sure what's going on here.

[That said he turns the camera to show Axel Walker, who - as usual - is a sight to behold.]

Make it rain! Oh yeah baby, just like that -- oh oh you are so fine.

[Axel is throwing what little money he stole because, you know, strip clubs aren't the best place to steal from, right back at the strippers. It's noble, you know. Like Robin Hood. He steals from the ugly old owners and gives to the sexy girls in need. Honestly, it's like charity, he's doing a good thing here. How could anyone want to put an end to this? Sliding some ones into girls' thongs, he turns to Leonard. While he's not entirely sure why he's being filmed, he assumes good reasons? He grins at the camera and tries his best to look cool, his body language changing to a sort of obnoxious swagger.]

Hey, yo, it's the Trickster once again and if you wanna get a little wiggle in your lap, come on down. I'm gonna be throwing singles at these honeys all night. No one is gonna stop me neither.

[He smirks cockily and turns back to the stripper, throwing a load of money at her.

Not to worry, children and concerned citizens, in spite of them obviously being at a strip club, Leonard takes care not to show anything that could entirely rob one's innocence.

He brings the camera back around to his face, just about smiling and clearly more amused than horrified.]


Help? I need a hero.



[ooc: Plotting post can be found here if you want to figure something out, otherwise just go for it. Commenting to each other and threadjacking are both HIGHLY encouraged! Action, voice, video or text, everything goes!]

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