measuringdicks: (you can have everything you want)
richie "trashmouth" tozier ([personal profile] measuringdicks) wrote in [community profile] maskormenace 2020-01-08 11:27 am (UTC)

permanently private video; tw internalized homophobia

[A humorless laugh.] Not in Derry in 1989. Small-mindedness is alive and well.

[And being helped along by a killer clown in the sewers.]

You can’t. Tell. Anyone. Not about—not about that. [He leans in close to the camera, like he wants to reach out and grab Loki by the shirt, pull him down to his level.] You can tell people I pissed the bed till I was eight or some other shit like that, I won’t give a shit, but you can’t tell them that I’m—that I want the wrong people, okay? Especially not Eddie. Please.

[No one can know, but Eddie most of all cannot know. Richie wants to keep him as his friend, even knowing his hopes won’t ever come true, and if Eddie ever found out he would flip out so fucking hard. Sure, the future’s different, but the old fear is still there, its poisoned roots deep in Richie’s system.]

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