006 ♍ voice

[glowsferatu]

[ kanaya knows she has to make this confession, not that she's particularly looking forward to it. but now that they've put her in solitary, nothing about this punishment has been satisfying. she needs something better.

everyone needs to know, but she doesn't want their pity, and doesn't deserve their sympathy. so. she kind of goes a little too far in the other direction, there. ]

I've been quiet the past few days. I say this not as an apology, because I don't particularly give a shit, but as an explanation. For those who don't know me, my name is Kanaya Maryam, an for the past few months I've been moonlighting as a costumed thug. One might even go so far as to say I was a supervillain.

Shocking, isn't it? I was a bit surprised, myself. [ not that she's going to explain that one. ]

As Hobgoblin, I committed numerous crimes, whether disrupting traffic, harassing the costumed set, playing ghost in a haunted house, other, more serious infractions. Kidnapping. Stalking. And...worse than that. [ her flippant tone cracks, her voice falling low and shaky. ] I've-- I've hurt people. People who didn't deserve it. Innocents.

[ there's a fury brimming in that last word, a self-loathing and shame. she can feel her hands shaking, her knuckles going white as she balls her fists. but they won't see that, it's important that they don't. if they recognize any remorse, it will defeat the whole purpose.

she takes a deep breath, letting it out slowly as she collects herself again. ]

For all of these things, the most the local authorities have seen fit to do is stick me in a room alone without my powers. Which is really great, I must say. Wonderful to know that we feed and house our criminals when law-abiding residents have no such amenities, especially when they aren't registered! I must say this world's punitive measures are deeply impressive, it truly overwhelms me with compunction, how much softer-handed it is than I expected when I turned myself in. I suppose I shouldn't be really surprised, when the approach to everything is such a joke, such a limp attitude toward justice is at least consistent.

But it isn't real justice. It's a mockery. [ she thinks of terezi, and wonders if she'd be more embarrassed by the meagerness of it, or that kanaya submitted herself willingly. terezi would know what to do here. ]

I'm sure many of you could do better, someone who really believes in the subject, unless you're too stuck in all the nonsense moralizing humans too often preoccupy themselves with. You're heroes. I'm a villain. That seems simple enough to me.

If you want to see real justice done, I'm not going anywhere.

Comments

[khajidont]

I just can't help but wonder why someone would take you down and let you go.

[glowsferatu]

[ with any other question, she could waver between which green goblin she was talking about. but she can't really save face by saying that one beat her by losing. but the other just beat her, and then tossed her aside like a broken toy. ]

i dont know
humiliation perhaps
a show of power and a flex of muscle

[khajidont]

Doesn't sound like the sort of guy I'd like. Or girl.

[He's learned his lesson about assuming genders. If he hadn't been focused on finding a man who could teleport...]

[glowsferatu]

i should hope not
there are certain types of people no one should like
no matter their differing positions on a moral divide

[khajidont]

So why not name him? Give people a heads up about who around here is trying to show off how strong they are?

[glowsferatu]

what so the heroes can eat their own
that would be nothing but an act of spite on my part
if he turns out dangerous to the rest of you as well what do i gain by warning you about her

[ she's inconsistent with the pronouns on purpose, if only because he keeps settling on "he". ]

[khajidont]

[Damn. He was hoping that by settling on one, she'd either correct him or settle for 'he'. There goes that plan.]

You're the one who made this big speech about justice.

[glowsferatu]

[ sorry jaime she is a shit like that. ]

did i say anything to imply her actions were unjust

[khajidont]

There was that part about beating people up to humiliate them.

[glowsferatu]

not people
me
is it really so terrible for him to do a heros job when encountering a villain

[khajidont]

Our job isn't to go around beating people up. No matter who they are, not unless that's the only option they've got.

And afterwards they don't just let them go.

[glowsferatu]

just because i was beaten doesnt mean i was captured
you cant catch a manipulator of space unless she allows you to

[khajidont]

Yeah, I know you can teleport. But you and I must have some pretty different definitions of being beaten.

[glowsferatu]

well there is the fact that you need armor to protect you
i just have the terrible habit of getting back up
one would have to do plenty more than crush my body to beat me

[ a physical beating, she can press through the pain, know that the damage will repair itself. as long as she has the will to keep fighting, she'll never have the need to stop.

but crush that will, and it's another matter entirely. ]

[khajidont]

It's impossible to knock you out?

[glowsferatu]

i wouldnt say impossible
but certainly not easy

[khajidont]

So when you say he beat you, you meant you stopped getting back up.

[glowsferatu]

youre thinking too literally
not all weakpoints will be physical

[khajidont]

Whoever beat you knew who you really are.

[It's a shot in the dark. She means emotionally, right? Who'd be able to do that besides someone who knows her? Jaime certainly wouldn't have been able to do it.

(He wouldn't have been able to do it even if he did know her.)]

[glowsferatu]

[ she hesitates, wondering whether she should answer in the positive. ultimately she decides that it does fit her story. it's as good a reason as any. ]

my identity had been compromised yes
thats what made its future unviable

[khajidont]

What you were scared he'd out you before you could out yourself?

[glowsferatu]

there was the possibility she could do that yes

[khajidont]

Right.

[That's all he can ask her now. He'll come later, he thinks to himself, to ask her a couple more questions in person.]

Good luck, Kanaya.

[glowsferatu]

im beyond luck now

[ of course, he couldn't know that fortune is the domain of her goddess girlfriend, the same one she just put in the hospital. it hasn't really worked out for either of them. ]

but maybe it will show you better favor