06 | video

[oceanthief]

[the feed is set to video, but Lapis seems only nominally interested in achieving a steady recording of her face. she's turned it on for another purpose, and the quality of everything else up until that point is really unimportant to her. at least gems don't have naturally shaky hands, even if the camera keeps trailing off into nothing now and then before she rights it, almost absent-mindedly.]

How long are you supposed to wait to be sure that someone's been ported out? I've seen people say stuff like 'a while', but humans and gems don't really seem to have the same idea of what a long time actually is.

I haven't seem someone who lives in this house with me for - [shit, fuck. Lapis' expression stutters into hesitance as she realizes that she has no idea how long she's been not seeing him, nor does she remember any useful earth calendar terms beyond month and year.] - I haven't really seen him lately. But he's kind of stupid and scared of me, so I don't know if that's on purpose or not.

[she gives a lopsided shrug, as if to say 'what can you do?' humans were a crazy weird little species, and she's given up trying to fix their misconceptions on a lot of things. if Hyunsoo wanted to think she was out to kill him, let him. he was the one looking dumb, not her.]

...I've got something else to ask, too.

[this is the reason that she'd switched the video on. Lapis' nose scrunches in a cross between disgust and bafflement before she swings the camera around to zero in on - the fridge?

without further ado, a little blue hand sneaks back into frame to swing the refrigerator door open. have you ever seen food left to its own devices for a little over a month, imPorts? if not, here's your prime chance to some front row seats because that is exactly what this fridge is full of.

clearly it's been a while since Hyunsoo was last here.]

Is food supposed to look like that?

Comments

[voicelessresistance]

No.

But it can make the experience worthwhile.

[oceanthief]

Only if they let you out.

[voicelessresistance]

[ there is a long delay before red answers.]

As someone who has lost absolutely everything, my people, my world, my music, my...

If you are as alone as you say, and this may be as close as you ever get to a second chance.

If you throw it away the only person holding you prisoner is you.

[oceanthief]

This isn't a second chance, this is a break. Whatever happens here, whoever I meet, it doesn't make a difference; in the end I still have to go back.

[she's not speaking of the seemingly inexorable call of the Porter here. Lapis refers to the silent promise she'd made to Steven to protect him, the maddening grip of Malachite she would have to return to in order to fulfill that vow.

there was no choice in the matter. Lapis' end had always been returning to her own world...no matter how attached she may grow to some of the people here.]

I build my own prisons now. I know what I can live with.

[voicelessresistance]

Your choice.

[oceanthief]

Not my choice. Not even close.

[voicelessresistance]

[Another delay before she answers.]

But it is!

You've decided that this life, that this world, is not worth your attention because it is transitory.
Eventually you'll have to leave.

Everything is transitory.
And eventually we all leave.
All we can do is enjoy what we have while we have it.

Or not, in your case.

[oceanthief]

I guess that's the way it works for humans, but gems don't die. We're always here.

The things you want me to care about will be gone before I can even start getting attached. Everything lasts even less in a world like this, where you can't even control whether you stay or not.

So maybe it's fine for a human to hang onto things that will just keep disappearing in a few seconds. I don't see the point in letting go that many times, over and over again.

[voicelessresistance]

So you're just going to be alone forever, then?

[oceanthief]

Not this time.

[Malachite was waiting for her at home, after all.]

[voicelessresistance]

While you're here then.

[oceanthief]

Not here, either.

[voicelessresistance]

So you have friends then?

[oceanthief]

I know people.

[she's far too guarded to tell a stranger just how fond she is of others. that was how people got hurt.]

[voicelessresistance]

Alright.
You don't know me, so I apologize for seeming so...forceful.

I just think it's a shame if someone takes what could be a bit of happiness and throws it away because of what will come later on.

That's all.

[oceanthief]

This wasn't really all that forceful.

[not compared to what she'd seen on Homeworld...hell, not even compared to Jasper's idea of coercion and duplicitous flattery. it had barely even registered in Lapis' radar as aggressive.]

It's not the case here, but sometimes it's better to let go of something like that because it'll only hurt you later. There's nothing more painful than holding onto memories of what you could have had more of but never will. It's like poison.

[voicelessresistance]

[There's a long, long delay before she answers.]

Yes. Yes it is.

But sometimes it's all you have. And you can work around it, but it's still there.

[oceanthief]

There's no point in hurting yourself just because that's all you can feel. All you're going to do is destroy who you were.

[voicelessresistance]

Not here, there isn't, I suppose.

[Red had been in the process of making an...unfortunate decisions...when she had been brought here.]

Being here has reminded me to be patient, at least.
And I've met a few people I care about.

[oceanthief]

That's good, I guess. Patience is useful for a lot more things than most people realize.

[voicelessresistance]

It is.
And gives you time to plan things out.

[ooc: these two should meet and talk in person sometime, I think. Well. 'Talk.' since Red...doesn't. Maybe over the network brain thing.]

[oceanthief]

That's only if you have that kind of forethought.

[ooc; haha, those pesky mutes. they totally should meet up sometime! it'll probably go about as well as this did rofl.]