maskormenace | first bite ☣ video

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first bite ☣ video

[Hello imPorts, there's a little girl on your feed today. She looks a bit scrawny and grungy, as if she hasn't had a decent meal in a very long time and only just gotten acquainted with the concept of running water.]

Hey, soooo. Hypothetical question for you guys. Say a bunch of space aliens landed on this planet like, tomorrow, and you had to convince them not to blow it up into a million pieces by showing them all the cool shit they'd be wrecking. Where would you start?

[Hypothetically. It's just a thought experiment and the aliens are totally not supposed to be a metaphor for her feeling totally lost and overwhelmed in this place and how much it has, when she’s used to so very little. She's way too subtle for that, obviously.]

Lists are acceptable and highly encouraged. It's um….for a school project. Yeah.

[She looks totally convincing. Even as she scrunches up her nose a little at the thought of school. Totally.]

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Hi, I'm a space alien. Let's try this now. Convince me not to blow up this planet.

[riptide won't mention he's been here for ages, nor does he have the means or desire to blow it up.]

[ Look, hypothetical or not, Kanan still has a lot of questions about this. So, uh, hi, have a guy with a mask covering half his face not actually looking at you because he's blind. ]

I assume you mean non-humans, but there are already quite a few of them here and... why would they want to blow up this planet?

Edited (stupid phone) 2017-11-06 21:53 (UTC)

pkmn

Umm... can the aliens eat?

[ Important questions. ]

[Hey, have an only slightly less grungy (though definitely less post-apocalyptic) child.]

You mean, like, this planet? [Yes, Mike. This one, not the one you're from, which means no Star Wars trilogy.] I mean, I guess everyone having superpowers is pretty cool. Unless the aliens already have those.

[ There is some sputtering on the other end as she tries to even guess as to what exactly they were teaching at school nowadays. She hadn't dropped out that long ago, had she? ]

Why is that a school project?

I don't know. I'd be tempted to show them something in nature, like a beautiful forest. But maybe it would be better to show them something we built?

That's an interesting project. Good that you're working on it. Are things going okay, outside of school?

That's one hell of a specific question.

Don't think any aliens I know would be impressed with the "cool shit" we have. [He laughs, obviously having a bit of fun with this.] But I hear the food is always a good place to start--win 'em over with our delicacies, or kill them with incompatibility I guess...

I'd probably be partial to showing 'em a beach myself though.

How'd you land that for a school project?

[That's, uh. Okay, that's kind of a weird question, but hey, she's willing to play along. It's not hard to see something of Carl in the girl, even if it's only age and general filthiness--her hypothetical reminds Beth more of her brother-in-law than anyone else.]

Am I still in North Carolina, or can I take them anywhere? [She's still thinking about it, biting into her lower lip.] Because there's a lot of cool stuff in Atlanta.

An art museum, obviously.

[...]

[Not as planned.]

Edited 2017-11-07 05:00 (UTC)

...Holy shit.

[THIS IS REALLY FUCKING COOL? BUT ALSO TERRIFYING. please don't blow up the planet she'd feel very bad about that.]

Well, first of all, no fair turning my question back on me. I only just got here, dude.

[...]

I guess I'd go with the food, though. I mean, why would you blow up deep fryers, am I right?

I dunno, probably an animal shelter or something. We totally deserve to get wrecked but they should at least give the puppies and kittens a shot.

[She tries not to stare overly much at the mask; it's kind of cool, but also weird. What's the deal with that, guy. (She hasn't even realized he's blind; it's not something you see a lot of, in the quarantine zones, where even children can be thrown out if they're not useful enough.)]

Uh. I dunno, isn't that just kind of a Thing? Aliens coming to a planet and taking it over or blowing it up or whatever? There was this one comic I used to read like that, anyway.

[She just sort of assumed that all alien fiction from before the outbreak was like that. It's not like she has had access to much of it.]

Edited 2017-11-07 06:00 (UTC)

[...okay, give her. a moment to figure out how to even text.]

pkmn? what's that?

[ Kanan scratches his chin thoughtfully. ]

Closest I've ever seen was some humans trying to blow up a moon for thorilide. ...Though, to be fair, the guy behind it wasn't so much human anymore as... a cyborg. As much droid as human. Not that that had anything to do with it.

Yes, absolutely.

[Give her all the food recs. All of them.]

Yeah, this planet.

[If aliens came after her planet, she's not so sure there's anything left worth offering them.]

The superpowers are pretty fucking badass, but let's say the aliens already have them.

[...ooookay, she wasn't expecting this person to sound so scandalized.]

Uhm.

We're supposed to...come up with theeeee....things that make the city what it is. The uh, culture and shit?

[That sounds vaguely legit, she thinks.]

Y'know, the stuff that'd...be lost if aliens were to uh, blow it up.

[Nah, things are not okay. She isn't okay. But she doesn't know how to begin to talk about any of it, so she just....doesn't.]

I'm fine. But yeah, that'd be better. We can definitely assume the aliens have forests.

Wait, seriously? You know aliens? That's so cool.

[Even if the aliens aren't the point of this hypothetical. But whatever.]

So, tell me, what're your planet-saving food recs?

[She shrugs.]

Teacher's way into scifi, I guess.

[answer her questionnnnnn]

Hmmm. Let's say you don't have a lot of time to go places before the kaboom, so you have to stick with the cities with teleporters.

[Which is still fucking surreal to say out loud, honestly. It's like being in a comic book.]

Huh. Why's that?

[It doesn't sound like she's disagreeing, exactly, but she's also never really been in a museum--other than a few minutes wading through the ruined husk of one while escaping Clickers. Tell her the wonders of museums, Yusuke.]

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