bookkeeper: ❝ THATASS ❞ (pic#11633268)
[personal profile] bookkeeper
WHICH ONE OF YOU DID THIS
THIS ISNT FUNMY
I MEAN IT
WHAT THE CRAP
IS THIS PAYBACK FOR NOT PUTTING A SOCK ON THE DOOR???


[ This was MEANT to be a private message sent to the folks living with him in Heropa #005, all of three or four others, but Nathan Drake and some bits of technology don't tend to mix very well. Especially when he's both furious and freaked out, his hands shaky as he types - god bless autocorrect.

This ends up going out to everyone on the network, however. All those lines. Mostly all caps.
]


(ooc: there ended up being a MoM IT version left in the DVD player, though Nate doesn't show it on the feed because that would involve reliving the horror, this scene in particular— warning: clown + blood effects — 90s Pennywise PRINCE ALBERT IN A CAN?? )
continuousgroaning: (no.)
[personal profile] continuousgroaning
the school year's barely begun and i've already landed in detention

i mean it is kinda my fault and at least the guidance counselor here is better than Mr. Frond was


[some time later, she adds:]

And i just got 2 days tacked on for being caught on my device

so I guess my point is I'm full of all this frustration and aggression & I'm not used to feeling this way so how do i try and burn it off?

video

Sep. 4th, 2017 07:24 pm
musclemothers: (LAYDEEZ)
[personal profile] musclemothers
A-hem, if I could have everyone's attention please! I've recently come to note that there's something of a... deficit in the imPort community. Sure, sure, you could try dating outside of our little community, but in light of all of this vandalism nonsense, do you really want to take that risk? After all, you may not figure out their ulterior motives until it's too late! Or they might just be a glory hound. Either/or.

[ Rusty himself has no problems with gloryhounds, but... that's not part of his pitch! ]

Anyhoo! To that end, I've designed an imPort-only dating app, accessible only from our very own communicators to make sure that no looky-loos get onto the system. All you do is upload a couple of the more flattering pictures you can take of yourself - and no dick pics, all you nasty horndogs out there, that'll be deleted automatically; if you like someone, you can do them the dignity of showing off your dick in-person, thank you very much - put up a brief blurb, and voila, love might be right around the corner!

[ He winks. It's not great. ]

And for next week, and next week only, I've made a deal with a few choice date locations as sponsors who will be willing to fund your romantic endeavors - just sign up, and our algorithm will do the rest. All you'll have to do is show up at the right place and time.

Ta-ta!

[ ... ]

Oh, fuck, and it's called imPress. Don't know how I missed that part...

[ ooc : if you want to sign up for randomized dates or if you just want your character to have a dating app on their profile you can use for future hook-ups, please direct your attention to THIS POST! thanks, and have fun! ]
wouldificould: (pic#11702253)
[personal profile] wouldificould
[ The audio function on this is remarkably similar to her show, with just a more limited audience. But this is Trish's element. This is where she shines. ]

Those of you who didn't have powers before coming here -- is it something that you dreamed of back home? Did... [ She pauses to find the right word. ] ..."gifted" people exist where you're from? I always tried to convince my best friend that she should put on a costume and save others. I guess I was trying to live vicariously through her that way.

There's something that happened. We call it "The Incident" because, well... "The Day Aliens Poured Out of the Sky" is a bit of a mouthful. A good portion of New York was destroyed and a lot of lives were lost, but it could have been worse. Unimaginably worse. But there were people who stepped in. Stepped up.

Do you think those who have the power should use it for the betterment of society? Share your thoughts.

( video )

Sep. 3rd, 2017 08:54 pm
youresovein: (get ready for a grape in the eye bro.)
[personal profile] youresovein
Well! What a group we all make.

[ Get a load of this guy. Leather jacket. Violet sunglasses. Touch of a French accent. He's not blending in at all, but it's clear that he's not particularly interested in trying to. He's lounging with feline grace (read: like he owns the place) in a corner booth at an all night pancake house, one arm draped casually over the back of the seat, the other holding the communicator. He gives the camera a smile and an elegant little wave. ]

Hi. Lestat here. Author. Rock star. Creature of the night. I introduce myself this way not to be egotistical — although I am, enormously — but because I've been told that it accounts for some of my eccentricities. I'll let you judge that for yourselves.

Now, I could go on about myself all night, and I gladly will if anyone cares to ask, but I have a question! There's no wrong answer. There may not be a right one, either. The question is in regards to a story, and the gist of the story, although significantly and brutally abridged, is this:

The protagonist of this tale isn't a heroic man, or even a particularly good man. Actually, he's mostly awful, when you get right down to it. And he had, quite some time ago, found himself down on his luck for a whole host of reasons, most of which he most certainly deserved. But one day, something changed. The particulars of that change don't matter right now, only that he knew that he, too, had to change; had to undergo what a generous author might call character development. And so this man made a grand if somewhat disastrous gesture of honesty, of love, and perhaps of repentance. Things didn't go as planned, because of course they never do in a good story, do they? Ah, but in any case: rising action, climax, denouement. All the parts were there, and the ending even hints at another volume.

And then— [ Here he waves his hand, as if to indicate the whole of everything: himself, the pancake house, the endless night outside the window where a vinyl poster advertises all you can eat waffles. ] This. And so my question is: what lesson, what kind of meaning do you think our protagonist should take from a plot twist like this? I find myself at a loss, my dear viewers, and it's too farfetched of a sequel hook for my tastes. I wonder whether—

[ He pauses here, something offscreen catching his attention, along with a weary, irritable-sounding customer service voice. ]

—ah! My lovely waitress Ethel is asking whether I intend to sit here vlogging all night or if I'm going to order something. Say bonsoir, Ethel.

[ He turns the camera; the surly waitress does not look amused. Back to Lestat, then. ]

Well, it seems even my charm has its limits. For now, then!

[ And with another wave, he signs off. ]
crofts: (pic#8377602)
[personal profile] crofts
Good evening.

( Said with all the politeness of someone raised with impeccable manners, rather than because there is anything remotely pleasant about the evening. She's not bothered to clean up very much from her arrival; still messy and smoky and bloody, though the smears would suggest she has at least attempted to make herself less alarming for the purpose of this message. )

My name is Lara Croft, of the Endurance. We were recently shipwrecked on the lost island of Yamatai. ( Simple, matter of fact. This was not so simple as keeping a diary in the hopes that someone would find it on her body, if she failed and if there was a body to be found. This was more like blogging, and when that occurs to her she's briefly at a loss for how to continue.

What would Sam do? )


I... appreciate that you must get a good many of these message broadcast so soon after arrivals come in, but it is imperative that I find my friends. A number of them were taken captive by a— madman called Mathias, acting as a figurehead for a cult who call themselves the Solarii. If any other survivors are here, I must find them. ( Lara's voice become a little quieter, more pensive, more like she's speaking to herself even as she continues to address the camera. ) They— try to burn women as a test for some sort of ritual, but I don't know what it all means, yet.


( She shakes her head, and her tone becomes more matter of fact. )

And I don't know what this means, either. Becoming open to the possibility that my father's fascination with myths and the mystical wasn't utter foolishness was onething, but.... this place is enough to make me wonder. Was something as bizarre as this the goal of the Solarii? Or perhaps I've finally lost my mind from exposure or blunt-force trauma, and this is simply the delusion that will make my demise a little less grim. Certainly it's a bit different from all those things people say about seeing you life flash before your eyes.

( There is a moment of quiet self-awareness, a very slight smile. ) If everything we see and hear is to be believed, I imagine that's a line of thought you're all rather familiar with, as well.

( The moment of softness is whisked away. )

Samantha Nishimura, Conrad Roth, Joslin Reyes, Jonah Maiava, Alex Weiss, and James Whitman. If those names are familiar to you, please advise me immediately.

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