Video

Oct. 14th, 2017 10:58 pm
secondplacescrow: (ah well she died with a good fart)
[personal profile] secondplacescrow
[ Video starts off with the image of the saddest looking, middle-aged man you can ever think of. He's already beginning to bald, and his beard is a thin, sad thing. Over all, he looks like a man who had seen some things.

He's also holding the camera upside down. ]


Is this how it works?

[ Someone off camera said, "Yeah, you had it turned on, so you can say anything now."

The man coughed. ]


'ullo. I'm Eddison Tollett. I'm from Westeros.

[ The other voice added, "hey, if you make mentions of your job from home . . . " and it became fainter, but the man named Edd seemed to understand his directions. He nodded in the way that one is still confused but managed to follow some of the logic. ]

Hash tag Night's Watch.

[ There's a pause. He looks up beyond the camera, confused. ]

So that makes it easier to find?

[ "No, you have to type it." Edd now looks a annoyed in a morose tone. ]

How in the seven hells do you people write anything with these tiny things? I can barely pick the fleas off my coat, never mind make tiny letters with tiny words.

[ The messages here are smaller than the scrolls on ravens, and that's something. ]

How do I type it?

[ The anonymous helper told him to press the button to end the recording. Instead, poor Edd sent it to the network instead. ]
d33tached: (✖ Under my feet ✖)
[personal profile] d33tached
I am seeking recommendations in the areas of literature, film, and musical selections.

Suggestions made in jest will be given no attention.


[Y'all know that ain't true.]

((Ooc: Quick reminder to check out this page under "music" to see how music has been affected in the MoM setting and what sorts of things would and would not exist here!))
versusseeker: (Eh...)
[personal profile] versusseeker
hey guys

[You might not be able to tell this from the text alone - but it's a nervous one. Red isn't used to talking much, even when it's not out loud - it's just plain hard for him. And that's made it pretty hard for him to make friends - and not just in this world. It's something that Red has always struggled with. Forming connections with Pokémon - animals, even? That's always been easy - even more so now that he can actually talk to them. The problem is is that he still can't talk to just regular old people.]

looking 4 frnds

[No, that's not enough. He knows that's not enough. He has to say more or they're not gonna get it - deep breaths, Red.

[Alright. Here it goes.]

i dnt tlk much
can b hard 2 make them
but i have pkmn


[Spell it out, Red.]

pokemon**
theyre cool if u wnt 2 see them

i thnk i am p nice
try 2 b


[With that, he lets the post go - but, a moment later, an edit appears:]

i don't have to type that way if you don't like it.
cigarbribery: (although we are miles apart)
[personal profile] cigarbribery
So, hi!

[The setting: an ice cream parlor, somewhere in Heropa. The scene: Foggy Nelson, eating ice cream, because somebody offered him free ice cream with toppings and he's broke. He gives the camera a little wave and a friendly grin.]

I'm Foggy Nelson—yeah, I know, not my idea, but I'm not changing it now—and I have some questions. Don't worry, I got the "welcome to another world, you have superpowers" speech, I just have some concerns it didn't address.

[Lots and lots of them, actually, but he'll just start with the most pressing.]

First of all, I'm a lawyer back at home. Got a law firm and a partner and even a sign for our office. [A pause, during which he looks quickly away from the camera and lets out a quiet, tired sigh like he's already missing it, then:] Of course, you don't have any reason to believe me, and I don't have any proof to back me up here. Which leads me to my first question: do my qualifications still carry over into an alternate universe? Because, man, being an insurance claim investigator is the only thing that's probably worse than being a lawyer. [He's both, so he gets to be funny about this.]

Second, I might need a crash course on imPort law. I'm pretty sure immigration law doesn't quite cover "forcibly dragged to another universe" that well, and I only got maybe a sketch of the benefits of registration when I tried to ask. [This whole registration thing honestly comes off as a little sketchy to Foggy, but he's going to keep his trap shut on that much.]

Third—does anyone here know what I mean when I say the Avengers? How about the Incident? I—just need to know.
d33tached: (✖ But your friends can't come ✖)
[personal profile] d33tached
I can't sleep.

[Normally D33 might have something a little more eloquent to say (or at least something a little more long-winded), but, then again, normally D33 would have also gotten more than a couple of hours of sleep in a week.

[Not this one. He's been up for a solid seventy-two now at least, and that's only if you're counting the brief two to three hours of tossing and turning in between. With mild hallucinations starting to set in, D33 is beginning to get desperate.

[Despite the increasing paranoia, he is willing to try just about anything at this point.]

I am in need of advice. Leave suggestions below.

Please.
magnitudes: ((☞゚ヮ゚)☞)
[personal profile] magnitudes
( Folks, it’s Sarissa. She’s posting about five am, and the hazy grey early morning light is all she has to work with. There’s hay in her hair. On the bale behind her slumbers a piglet. She’s got another in her lap.

Surprise, she’s in the barn. )


G’day g’day, tuning with an important philosophical question for all you good people of the network. I was gonna ask Saroula, but she locked me outta the house for making shitty jokes, and then I think she fell asleep before remembering to unlock the door.

( Is this the slight madness of not-enough-sleep, or is it regular Sarissa? It’s hard to say. )

So, okay, back to business. If a snail doesn’t have its shell is it…

( She plays a gentle drum roll on the sleepy piglet’s belly, and it makes a sleepy sound, moving to get comfy again. )

a) Naked
b) Homeless
or
c) Minimalist?

Important question, right? Feel free to slug it out as you enlighten me with your gastropodical opinions. And if someone can bring me a clean shirt and some coffee that’d be great. I could be out here a while.

voice |||

Jun. 30th, 2017 03:14 pm
uncledad: (41)
[personal profile] uncledad
In my country, we are ruled by a king. His subjects need not vote for him because he came by the crown in some way or another. The king selects his Hand, his Small Council, holds his court, does all the business of ruling. Household positions are filled by stewards. Lords and ladies swear fealty to the crown. Trade goes on.

Without popular elections, what we are truly free of is a great deal of pointless speech-making. Is the position of ambassador truly so coveted that everyone must spend so much breath on it?

I mean nothing against those brave men and women competing for the title, of course, nor the fine speeches that have been made over this network. Conveniently, we can go back and listen to them anytime we wish... if anyone has ever wished for such a thing.

[Oh, wait, an afterthought:] And nothing against any of our current ambassadors either, I suppose. Will they begin to make speeches to compete with the speeches made before them? It's a horrible thought.

Unfamiliar as I am with such elections, I wonder how long we must suffer this process. Another fortnight? A year?

» video

Jun. 9th, 2017 04:58 am
golder: DNT (pic#11475443)
[personal profile] golder
( When her image appears, she may immediately be recognizable to some. She is young, with healthy colour in her cheeks and a brightness in her eyes where not long ago there had been neither. )

Where I come from, there was an entire epoch in history where great heroes walked the land. One of my forebears, Durran Godsgrief took to wife the daughter of two deities of wind and sea. They rained down such a tempest upon the wedding party that Durran's family and guests all died.

One after the next, he built successfully larger castles to weather their grief. Until finally the seventh, built with the aid of either the Children of the Forest or Bran the Builder finally survived and withstood the gods' rage. He was known as Godsgrief ever after, for having caused them such a bother.

( She is wise enough now not to speak of Lann the Clever instead, as she assumes her secret must ever remain precisely that. Her green eyes hold the camera, as she tilts her head, effecting a thoughtful façade. )

The word 'hero' carries a different sort of weight here than what I am familiar with. Is it simply this world, or others? ( She wonders if hers is merely an anomaly. ) Is the definition of heroism someone with godlike powers in the songs and stories of your realm, or are some ordinary people who manage to accomplish great things?

( Myrcella is, for now, putting on the impression of wide-eyed curiosity to stem her panic at having not only been resurrected, but with the ability to maim others if this file is correct. Her features soften apurpose, and she gives a sweet smile to her audience. )

Thank you.
infomodder: feelin like a freight train in need of a haircut (it's just one of those days)
[personal profile] infomodder
Why don't fish like basketball? They're afraid of the net.
What fish can perform operations? A sTurgeon.
What do you get when you cross a banker with a fish? A loan shark.
What do sea monsters eat? Fish and ships.
What is the difference between a piano and a fish? You can tune a piano but you cannot tuna fish.
What's the best way to catch a fish? Have some one throw it at you.
Did you know the octopus is the only fish that can squirt ink? Just squidding.
Why don't fish pass their exams? Because they work below C-Level.
Why did the octopus cross the road? To get to the other tide.
How do shellfish get to the hospital? In a clambulance.
Did you hear about the goldfish who went bankrupt? Now he's a bronze fish.
Did you hear about the fight in the kitchen? A fish got battered.
What do you call a fish with two knees? A tunee fish.
What fish goes up the river at 100mph? A motor pike.
What is the best way to communicate with a fish? Drop it a line.
Why did the fish go to Hollywood? He wanted to be a starfish.


[Yep. That's the post. Just a bunch of awful fishy jokes that are absolutely anonymous and no one can prove otherwise. However, his pool is limited...time to reach out.]

Your turn. Share your favorites, imPorts.

[Whether he means favorite fish jokes or favorite bad jokes is a mystery. Do your best worst, chums.]

video.

Mar. 5th, 2017 12:36 am
compensates: (012.)
[personal profile] compensates
[ Tyrion tends to prefer voice simply because video at first deeply unnerved him, but even though it has taken him weeks he has finally grown used enough to the devices to be confident in their use, and he has decided therefore to send his own message out. His face, as it appears, is twisted and scarred beneath the explosion of dark beard, at odds with his tousled blond curls — but, truly the best thing about this sort of communication, his height is not apparent. ]

Good evening.

[ A pause as he considers if that was foolish: it may be evening for him now, but might not be when others watch the video ... nevertheless he perseveres. ]

I've been learning a little about the civics of this world. I must say, it makes a great deal more sense to me than simply allowing a man to rule by the mandate of his birth. And yet I cannot help but wonder if this "democratic process" works quite as well in reality as it does on paper. What is to stop one man simply rising through duplicity? By all accounts the position of an imPort Ambassadorship is effectively for life.

[ Not naming any names! Just something to consider!! It's not like there are any elections on right now, he's simply a concerned citizen.

Anyway, he seems to realize he monologued a bit and smiles ruefully.
]

It's very easy to get carried away speaking to these things, isn't it? I will keep my second inquiry brief: were I interested in aquiring the services of someone to safeguard my person or property, where would I best start? I would prefer someone familiar with this world's "technology" as well as skilled in combat.

[ Because he is bad. As demonstrated by the fact that he forgets to turn the video off and there is another five minutes of him quietly reading a book and sipping wine before the message ends. ]
infomodder: actual murder messiah will graham (jesus was also a fisherman)
[personal profile] infomodder
[The video opens on Will, in his usual plaid, with a stupid fishing hat (REEL WOMEN FISH) sat atop his head. It's old and worn enough to show he favors it, wrapped about his head with a fishing hook tucked along the bill. He's propped against a stool with a line of fake bait and various fish-y bits and bobs behind him...and a sign that says NOW HIRING INQUIRE WITHIN hung just so it's easy to see from the window outside and inside as well.]

It's been brought to my attention some of you might've been getting unasked for messages. About fish, or the ocean...anything alone those lines. [ha ha ha like fishing lines o man] Should be fixed by now. If it keeps up, just...give it a few days and it should stop.

[He makes a "what can you do" face and then looks to the sign like he forgot it was there. A nudge of his elbow makes it a more prominent focus.]

Getting ready to retire. I'll still own the shop, but I won't be working here any more. Looking for some people who need a steady paycheck and don't mind bugs. ImPorts get priority. If you want something from time to time, that's doable, too. Just let me know.

[As he goes to sign off, a furry head comes into view and gives the screen a big, tongues-out smile. Fantastic.]

004 {video}

Jan. 3rd, 2017 01:24 am
wordaday: (r165: Fffuuuuuuuuuuuuuu-)
[personal profile] wordaday
This is the worst thing I've ever seen. It's uglier than sin.

[There's no Sookie on camera, only a brightly colored tshirt with some godawful chevron details. It's got a stylized picture of Sookie's face, next to the words "Oh bless your heart!"

She didn't even buy the damn thing. She'd been so mad she stomped out of the store with it.]


I found this shopping at the Y'all-Mart. Is this legal? This can't be legal. Who do I yell at for this?

[Baby's first unlicensed merchandise. How sweet.]

video;

Dec. 31st, 2016 11:45 am
helpline: (OH MY FUCKING GOD HUMANS)
[personal profile] helpline
[ The Doctor flips on the camera. Anyone who knows him really well can tell that he seems older, though he doesn't look it. He's older in that way that someone who's experienced some sadness is older despite the fact that they still look exactly the same. Of course, he's not going to talk about that, instead talking about something completely different because hahaha, acknowledging your problems is stupid! ]

I think this universe is contagious.

[ just said 100% seriously before continuing. ] I pop back home, accidentally mind you, and what do I deal with? Superheroes! Actual superheroes, just like you lot! Well, a actual superhero and probably not entirely like you lot, you're the ones who've got stupid universes where you get weird powers in weird ways and not by sensible methods like swallowing a space rock. [ because that is entirely sensible. ]

He had a mask and a secret identity and everything. And a baby, but I don't think babies are essential to the job. So, network, question! Who else has had weird contagious cross-universe bleed-over because I'd hate to be an outlier. I'm always the outlier.

Also! Who do I talk to in order to get the names changed? You can call me Doctor Mysterio now. [ said with the right inflection of ham and finger wiggles. Then there's a pause, before, ] Maybe not, let's just stick with the Doctor. Doctor Mysterio's good but it's a bit too long, how're you going to get all that out in time? By the time you've finished saying 'oh no, it's the Daleks, help us out Doctor Mysterio' then they've gone and vaporized you.
ohmyclara: (dropping glasses just to hear them break)
[personal profile] ohmyclara
I have a question about nanites.

[Said casually, but with a certain amount of self-importance. Clara Oswald opens conversations as though they were great doors to be flung.]

They're what bring us back when we die, yeah? They repair what's malfunctioned, like... like a pit team. [She thinks that's what they're called, at least.] But what if nothing's there to fix? That's what I want to know. If there's no body left, there are no nanites left, so the Porter just... rematerializes you? Plops down a backup file? If there's too much damage to fix, what exactly happens?

[It's all asked in a very matter-of-fact, academic tone. Clara could maybe use a lecture on morbidity from her past self.]

video; 001

Dec. 1st, 2016 11:36 pm
flayjoy: (pic#10294179)
[personal profile] flayjoy
[ The video begins with a deep sigh as a somewhat disheveled Theon Greyjoy. He's gotten himself all angry and frustrated just by struggling with the device. He's responded to others, but never had to record his own message. Now that he's gotten it figured all out, he's angrier than he normally would be and his voice comes out in a hiss. ]

Would someone care to tell me what I'm supposed to do with this?

[ He slams an open hand against the wall behind him, perhaps with a little too much vigor. When he lifts his hand, the image of a fearsome golden kraken is emblazoned onto the wall. He looks annoyed. Clearly, he has not yet seen its full potential. Merchandising, Theon. Merchandising. ]

It's the sigil my House, House Greyjoy. The rulers of the Iron Islands. Great seafarers and archers, and once great kings. [ The typical spiel, but definitely the cliff's notes version. ] Every time I touch something with too much force, the same thing happens.

[ He slaps another kraken onto the wall, just to prove his point. As proud as he is and as willing as he is to fluff up his House's reputation a bit, this is ridiculous. ]

What point is there to this? What use is it to me?
ohmyclara: (a chest filled with diamonds and gold)
[personal profile] ohmyclara
[The feed clicks on, and the voice that follows is astoundingly cheery in comparison to the subject matter.]

So. How would you go about celebrating a birthday and a deathday at the same time, without involving cake or alcohol?

[A beat.]

Asking for a friend.
anxiogenic: (Disgust)
[personal profile] anxiogenic
My "therapist" implied I do not seek meaningful connection and so here is a meaningful survey:

[He eyeballs the camera and barely constrains the frown eating at the bottom corner of his lip. He's sitting straight in an armchair in a vintage room. Anyone getting a good look at him might notice he's too old. Unable to hide his true face, but it doesn't matter.]

Are our lives worlds of actions and reactions, behaviours and reinforcements?

Do we live without freedom or meaning?

Is existence defined through external activity?

Are human personalities nothing but the sum of human behavioral patterns?

[His gaze wanders in the ceiling.]

Or, for the modern generation; what is personality? [¯\_(ツ)_/¯ the education system.] Let's hear you pose entirely different models of what a human being is, and then argue from there.

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