maskormenace

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[Getaway doesn't bother with any "hi how is everyone" or anything particularly charming for his "first" post. He's been here before, and he has a lot of of mixed feelings about being back. He's about to talk about those feelings, because he's in a bit of a weird mood right now. That kind of mood where he's between wanting to talk and connect to people, and wanting to violently murder the next fool who so much as looks at him.

Right now he's leaning towards talking. He's got absolutely nothing else, so he'll talk.]

Ever had the weird experience where one moment you're very, very dead in your own reality, and suddenly you wake up here, fully alive? And you're like, sure. I'm alive. That's a good thing to be, yes? Great, even! But now you've got to live with the memory of how and why you've died and things just go really, really badly from there.

And now you're here! Someplace else from everyone you've ever known, and that's not even necessarily a bad thing? Because you're alive! Great! Fantastic!

[His voice is cheery. Almost overly so. His expression is blank, but that might be the case no matter what for some people, as he doesn't really have a face, his only ability to express himself is in his eyes and body language. Neither of them show a whole lot in a video. Someone with a good sense of people might get the sense that this cybertronian was on the edge of a breakdown.]

Alive!

With nothing!

But in the grand scheme of things, it's better to be alive with nothing than to be dead with nothing, yes? That might mean that someone out there, somewhere out there, wants to keep you around for their own purposes. Interesting thought, eh?

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Too many of us have had that experience.

[She studies him for a moment]

Really, really badly like you can't stop thinking about your death, you have nightmares and flashbacks? Or something worse?

[Another pause as she tries to guess at how much is sarcasm.]

Being alive's got to be better than the alternative. Even with the bad memories. It's not like we have nothing here. We can go outside, have jobs, make friends.

But that's a creepy thought. I don't want to be used for anyone else's purposes anymore.

I haven't gotten to the nightmares yet, but I'll get there.

[Getaway says brightly.]

Mostly because I haven't slept yet since I died. Not sure I'm going to either. Died pretty gruesomely, I did.

Why should anyone have to live with memories of your death? Seems a bit out of the order of things to me.

Maybe you'll get lucky and not have them.

If you do have them, I find it helps to have reminders of this life around. Pictures of the friends I've made here, my pets, stuff like that. So when I wake up, I can see it.

Do you not need sleep? I can't stay up more than a few nights without falling asleep.

I have to live with what happened to me because I don't have a choice. Just like you have to live with the memories of what happened to you. It sucks. I can help. I have a healing power.

We need rest as much as anyone does.

And there's... no one I valued enough in life that I have any momentos of them in death. Well, I guess that's not true. One is dead and one is somewhere else. Hopefully better off than where I left him.

[He speaks vaguely, as though everything is out of focus to him.]

Thanks for the offer, I'll keep that in mind. May I ask how you died? Or is that too personal?

I meant mementos of your life here. The people and things you know in this world. The ones that here now.

[She glances away for a moment.]

My throat was cut.

[She looks back to him.]

Were you murdered?

I was.

[He's not going to go into details because this is public and he doesn't really want Riptide to know, just yet, how he died.]

But not by anyone I was expecting. Surprise deaths are the worst.

And I had no idea getting your throat cut was fatal to humans. The more you know.

Was it someone that loved you?

[Oops. Maybe she shouldn't have shared that information. She shrugs.]

It can be. It wasn't fatal the first time I had my throat cut.

I sorta have that too...cause of shit I remember a previous life, so technically 'dying'.

[Getaway seems genuinely curious.]

"Previous life"?

How does one feel about death when you've lived more than one life?

You all right there?

Of course!

[He says with an almost convincing air of cheer.]

Why wouldn't I be?

I only died after all. Death isn't a huge deal apparently.

I'm fine!

[He's very clearly not fine.]

...right. [Totally not believing you, totally not going to call you out right in public. You seem to have others perfectly willing to do that for you.] Well, I know some people do struggle with the concept. A near-death experience does tend to change one's perspective.

Well, isn't that an exciting adventure.

[The words come out with a small amount of bitter sarcasm.]

I would ask questions like "what does life even mean anymore?" but I wouldn't expect a human to have figured that out. No offence.

Sounds like it's not an easy question for anyone to answer, [Markus response with just enough cheek to be obvious.]

The price of being a sapient being in this vast and terrible universe.

So what are your thoughts on it, human?

[ew] Android. [Like, understandable mistake, but still] And I think it is a huge deal. Death is the final, unconquerable foe that any sapient being must face. There's a reason why we're all afraid of it.

[Getaway's demeanor changes in a slight, subtle way. He knows better than to be openly hateful in public, but the idea that he's been talking to an AI this entire time fills him with disgust. Especially one who doesn't even have the decency to have its own design. Human AI's? Please.

His tone is as casual as it was before, and nothing obvious changes in their interaction besides a two second pause before Getaway speaks again.]

It never occured to me that an AI could be afraid of death.

[Because AI aren't alive in the first place. Everyone knows that.]

I always imagined they'd have, oh I don't know, backup systems or whatever. That you have some self-actualization is... quaint and charming. I like it.

[Ninety percent sure that was supposed to sound as insulting as it actually did.]

Luckily for me, my existence doesn't depend on your opinion of it.

What what now?

[Getaway exclaims, as though startled by Markus' sudden hostility. He continues on, his tone genuine.]

I believe I said that your kind is quaint and charming. In my culture, that's a positive! I have nothing against you, I promise. My, such an overreaction says that you must be fairly new, am I right? A decade or so old, perhaps?

I wasn't born yesterday, at least. [This is some of the most soft-spoken hostility Getaway will ever receive]

[Oh no.

Getaway has gotten all kinds of hostility over the past few years.

This is nothing.]

You might as well have been.

Well, it's been nice talking to you AI, but I'm afraid I have to go. Cheerio and all that. Let's talk again sometime.

[He gives a small wave and then swiftly terminates the connection.]

[UGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH]

Nah, mate. I think it's better you're dead with nothing. That's hilarious. Was it slow? I hope it was slow. Oh, you stupid bastard. This made my day, thanks.

I hate you.

[He says without any feeling at all.]

Awww. Not gonna tell me I'm in hell with you? That's too bad.

So who got you? Was it Star Sabre? I bet it was.

You know what the worst part of this?

I am actually stuck here with you. I literally have no choice but to exist alongside you and I think that's pretty hellish. I can't believe you're the one thing, the only thing, I have from home.

At least you don't have to think of things like that. The three individual sparks in your brain are probably never together long enough for that.

[riptide laughs loudly, obnoxiously and definitely cruelly.]

Ohhh, yeah. Did you see Tailgate is gone too? That's too bad. Just really awful. The one guy who might sorta-care about you. Guess it was a pretty stupid end for you to be this mad. You trip into the oil reservoir or somethin'?

Edited 2018-08-15 21:31 (UTC)

As bad as this is for me, I'm just glad you didn't survive either.

[He hisses irritably.]

Poor Riptide, dying like he lived:

Stupidly.

You've got no home to go back to either.

Aww. You poor dumbass. You gotta copy my ideas to try and make me feel bad.

[he snorts.]

Bold to assume that's enough to rattle me, Get-a-stupid.

[You ever come across someone who is literally too stupid to threaten? It's frustrating as fuck and Getaway has lost all of his patience.]

There are so many things I can say to you Riptide, but none of them will get through your thick cranium. Bottom line is that there's no good end for any of our race and everyone we've ever known is probably going to die. That's my understanding of it anyway.

It's probably an end they all deserve.

Ramping it up, huh? Cute.

Heh.

I'll let you think on it.

[He says right before he cuts connection.]

Yes. Only I didn't wake here, it was somewhere else.

If you don't mind keeping a secret... those thoughts never truly go away.

[And yes, Roland is fully aware this is public.]

I'm sure they will eventually. We're a very long-lived species.

[Maybe in a million years he'll have forgotten all about this. Assuming he exists in this place that long and a thousand other variables.]

How do humans handle such things? You're such a short-lived species that, to me, you barely have a chance to live before you're gone again. It's quite tragic, really.

[Err... considering he appears to be speaking with a giant robot, Roland has no doubt this person would indeed live a long life.]

We attempt to live each day to the fullest. Of course, some days "the fullest" is simply sitting on the couch and accomplishing nothing of value, but there's something to be said for charging one's mental battery.

[Look, sometimes a man just wants to veg on the couch watching Netflix. Don't judge.]

Our lifespan is adequate for our needs.

That sounds...

[He pauses to think about it. To be quite honest he's never put any serious thought in human lifespans beyond the vague pity that their lives are too short.]

Nice.

So how does a human know when they've lived their lives to the fullest?

I'd like to think that most of us try on a regular basis, but the only time we truly know is when our time is up.

[Roland forces himself to take a breath. It might not be true for everyone, but he can say without a doubt it was true for him.]

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