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[He's not so thrilled about the latest revolving door port out, just like everyone else, but Pete's also got a question that's been bugging him ever since he ported back in. Especially with all the weird, subtle changes to the place ~~though frankly he's thrilled he no longer has to hide a tattoo that says 'Vigilante'~~]

Hey, so, weird question given all the...well, everything lately.

[Enjoy those wide, sweeping gestures at nothing in particular- the boy talks with his hands, and he's pretty sure people can figure out exactly what he's talking about. Given how most of the other imPorts are just as weirded out this month.]

How exactly do birthdays work here? I don't mean like parties or customs or anything, I mean for, you know, government stuff. Because when I ported in, I was only a couple months away from mine, but here I was already a few months past it, and with all the weird changes lately I'm not sure if any of the locals'd believe me and

Look, I just wanna know if I have to be sixteen for a whole 'nother year. Plus, I figure some people could use a normal, non-creepy question about how this place works right about now.

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[ At first all you can see is a fuzzy black butt before Bart carefully removes the kitten from his device. ] Behave, you. [ The kitten purrs loud enough to be picked up on the microphone even as it settles into the crook of his elbow. ]

I think this place considers me seventeen since it's been over a year now since I got here, but I actually don't know how old I am anymore. It's been hard to keep track, because I'm not sure what really counts.

Besides, it's still annoying that Kon's legally adult here and I'm pretty sure I'm still older by two years.

Personally I've resorted to counting days individually, then add them to the known point on the calendar back home accordingly. And I also factor in leap years, but that's also based on when they'd occur back home, not here. Just in case that's different.

[Leave it to this particular nerd to pick the most meticulous and time-consuming option possible. For something that really wasn't a big deal, no less.]

Maybe they factor in maturity, and not just chronology?

I spent two years reading in a library one evening, subjectively speaking. How would you count that? And that's just one example of the strangeness of speedster lives.

Also, I'd have to have seen a chronometer of some kind before each timeskip because it seems like you never arrive in the hour you left, and do you count local planetary days, or does everything have to be corrected to a twenty-four hour cycle? And does the time when I'm in more than one place count twice?

[Oh boy, talk about a question that had been hard to navigate for David when he'd first arrived.]

That's one of the more complicated parts of our lives here. I arrived just after and just before my own birthday. I was able [though mostly through a lot of questionably legal methods] to be recognized as older.

But I've definitely helped other Peter Parkers get promoted a grade level, if you want.

I'll keep that in mind. Mostly just in case I get tired of school, but so far it's been a nice refresher. Plus with only so much time in the day and different syllabi involved, there's still some new stuff here and there!

[He'll politely avoid the subject of any other Parkers getting tired of school and wanting to bounce up a level. Or two? More? Not that he wasn't curious, but because he knew it was best to avoid looking into anything that would frustrate him about alterna-Petes without the luxury of being able to argue with them in person.]

Kinda miss the extracurriculars though. Interning with Doctor Connors was a blast- well, up until I blew it, anyway. Still, I don't think I realized how unusual it was to let interns help with genetic experiments until coming here. When I asked about it, I'm not sure if my bio prof was horrified or convinced I was punking him!

[Considering it was that Doc Connors, hard not to see why.]

[It was more that the Peter he knew here had already been in that grade level twice because of complications of his world.]

There are people you can get internships with, scientists. I could help you look into biologists. I mostly know roboticists and physicists.

Whoa, that's a good question. My birthday's not even on the same calendar! If you figure it out let me know though, some guy told me I can't be a bouncer professionally until I'm 18.

Man that would complicate things.

How compatible's your world's calendar and timekeeping with this one? If it's simple enough, we could always try to convert it.

[Peter no]

Edited 2020-10-30 00:22 (UTC)

This world's got twelve months a year too, right? My birthday's the first of Blue Sea Moon, that's the seventh month in Fodlan.

[Jane stares for a long while.]

I forgot my own birthday. Back in June. July?

[Oh dear god, she is a theoretical astrophysicist, weird reality stuff is what she does, why can't she answer this question?]

I would say ... consider yourself seventeen now? There's no need to repeat an age year and there's not too much difference between sixteen and seventeen anyways.

[Leave it to the science-y crowd to be tripped up with all the various implications tied to an otherwise simple question. Especially the ones from a place where the multiverse isn't a thing- at least not a known thing.]

I mean, I do, but I meant more along the lines of how to go about getting official documents to reflect that. Because even though I know it's true, as far as I know they've got access to about as much proof backing it up as they would if I said I was Napoleon.

[Wait, he hasn't checked that either.]

This universe did have Napoleon, right? Short guy, funny hat, liked keeping one hand tucked in?

[Oh, yeah. Even if Jane went back home and was able to keep her memories, good luck being able to prove anything.]

Huh. You might just have to check what paperwork they have on you and then recalculate your age from today's date. Like me for example—

[Wait.

...

Jane.exe has stopped working.]

... okay, I get what you mean completely. Am I 39 or am I 32? Still, maybe subtract your birthdate from 2020 and go from there?

[How did she miss this basic question???]

But yeah, my world did have Napoleon. I don't know about this one. I haven't looked up any French history.

I think different people do different shit for their birthdays. You should do something cool to celebrate the birthday you missed and say you're 17. Or just tell the locals you're from a world where people age different and you're 170. They'll think it's cool.

[There's certainly been enough days he felt like he was 170...]

They're not really a big thing for me. Back home any party'd only be like five people, tops. And that's counting my aunt and Gwen's dad, if he could make it.

Little stuff like trying to figure out how I'd go about proving I'm as old as I know I am to government officials in an alternate universe with no way of verifying my claims, though? They're fun little thought experiments good for passing the time.

You don't need a lot of people for it to be a good time. My birthday was last month and it was just me and Richie and it was perfect. [He'd had so much fun that he'd hadn't been missing his other friends.].

Like I.D. and shit? That's true. None of us can call home for our birth certificates. Or any important shit. This place has a lot of problems like that. We can't even get our medical records and doctors gotta have that.

You could just pick whatever number you want. I don't think anyone would argue.

Edited 2020-10-24 22:56 (UTC)

[Talking blue orb. That's interesting. Run/Bounce away while you can Rimuru or he'll start asking questions with absolutely no easy answer.]

Thaaaat's... defeating the whole point of trying to prove it, though.

Also, no offense but: How are you talking?

[Too late.]

I was in high school when I got here, and honestly? I just lied. Figuring out timelines with places like these are all kinds of hinky, so as long as you're not going around telling people you're twenty-one, they'll generally be okay just rolling with it. It's obvious you aren't just doing it to buy booze, and it's not so far off from the age you look, so it works. It's sorta the least of the government's problems when they've got so many non-humans that age at completely different rates from us.

From what I've studied the 'year' here and the 'annual' from home are close enough in terms of span of time that I can roughly translate the two calendars, and I'm using home's.

It's not that different from converting local time on the Outer Rim to Core Basic as occasionally you run into systems that use a different measure of time along with a different language than Basic.

That um. Probably doesn't help you...

I don't know exactly, either. Technically, after spending so many months here, I'd be over 19 by now, but my birthday is in December so... maybe I'm still 18.

Maybe people will just accept whatever you tell them?

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