16 ⚜ Friday the 13th - Anonymous Post

[restingstitchface]

[The message blinks in obnoxious neon text, and anyone who cares to click on such obvious clickbait will find themselves watching a video.]

MEET NEW SINGLES IN YOUR AREA NOW! THEY'RE HOT AND READY FOR YOUR CHATS!!! ;* ;* ;*

Or...

ARE YOU A GENIUS? 1 SIMPLE TEST WILL PROVE YOUR IQ! CLICK HERE TO UNLOCK YOUR TRUE POTENTIAL!

Or...

LOCAL MAN DISCOVERS ORGANIC TRICK FOR A HEALTHY MIND! DOCTORS HATE HIM! WHAT'S HIS SECRET? DON'T BE A-FREUD AND CLICK TODAY!!! SAY NO TO BIG PHARMA!!!

[And cue feed! The person who appears on screen is unique to every viewer. The message appears to have been sent too early, mind. Their head - or noodly appendages if you're into that sort of thing - is turned from the camera. It seems they're rehersing what they're going to say.]

Hello.

I have been residing here for some days now. I do not know as many people here as I should, and I regret that my first interaction here must be to seek advice:

To that end. Is there anybody here who knows me back home? I would like to speak to you.

[OOC: This is a special anonymous post for Friday the 13th. All clickbait leads to a free feartrip, courtesy of Crane's hallucinogenic powers. Players can opt-out by NOT having their characters click the link; they can reply to the ad-bot and chat with Harley or Calendar Man instead. If characters watch the video, they will see someone they know and are afraid of. Please specify who's being hallucinated. Eg. Bel-Shamharoth. Mr. Jefferson. Merle Dixon. Lucifer. And please specify video or headline in headers in either case.

Lastly, it'd be lovely if you could fill these permissions. Thanks!]

Comments

[Video] CRANE'D - Ryotaro Dojima

[sleight_of_hand]

[ Adachi doesn't normally go for clickbait, mostly because he knows better, but... well, he's bored, and he can never resist the urge to prove how smart he is, especially when he wasn't going to get smacked for it. The resulting video, however? Thaaaaat he wasn't counting on. He had been half way to taking a swig from a beer when the familiar voice flooded over his cell phone thing, and needless to say whatever he did manage to get into his mouth went flying out. He flopped upright, staring at the familiar face in utter disbelief. ]

[ No way this could be real, right? Right? ]

D-Dojima-san!?

[restingstitchface]

[Crane had gone though a number of scenarios in his head when he'd caught onto what Harleen was doing. Murder being the most foul. His gaze first falls on her, outside of the camera, before it turns to Adachi. He's silent for a moment, mostly because he's preparing himself to act differently. Which is more difficult these days.

Still. He's used to having to adapt on the fly, so he picks to roll up his sleeves and get right into it.]

Adachi?! [Another pause. Hmm. Dojima'd be surprised to see his buddy cop, right?] I hope you haven't been causing trouble.

[Video] CRANE'D - Merle Dixon

[dirtyredneck]

[Daryl is still getting the hang of these comunicators. He'd managed to figure out the text vs voice that was more like the burner phones Merle used to get and toss his way for one off transactions or emergencies. But the rest of it was still a learning curve for him. He hadn't clicked on the ad because he was actually interested in meeting new singles. He'd clicked on it because he'd been trying to get rid of it.

The quick switch to a new video feed made him think he'd been successful. And he'd been about to turn it off, already having wasted enough time on the not-phone to deal with the advertisement, when recognition hit him. There were very few things that could made Daryl choose of his own accord to use the video option. His brother was one of them. Even if the way he was speaking was a little off, there was no denying that was his voice. And no denying that was the back of his head.]

Merle?

[Daryl's own voice was choked with emotion barely restrained. Surprise and hope and the pain of loss. He didn't care that everyone and anyone could see it on him, though he normally tried to hide this sort of thing. He'd lost his brother less than a year ago and now, in this place, he had the sudden bright spark of hope he'd get him back.]

[restingstitchface]

[Crane isn't sure what to do in this case.

This guy is new. They haven't talked much; he had experienced a far higher number of conversations with Adachi and other members of the community. But the way Daryl had responded was fascinating. Surprise and hope and the pain of loss, yes. And what would happen once he lost that spark of hope?

He can probably guess the guy's way of speaking, though. Rough like this one if they're that close. Sturdy. No bullshit. He even snorts a little.]

Well, looks like you've survived at any rate. [Can you feel the brotherly love?] You going to tell me what the hell's going on or what, Daryl?

[Video] Crane'd like a loser - Tana Moon

[tactile_telekinesis]

[So it was an obvious clickbait ad, and it was completely accidental that he hit anything really. He'd meant to scroll away from the link when his finger pressed instead of flicked upwards.

And oh. Oh this was just cruel. He didn't have to see her face to recognise her voice. Right now there's all kinds of emotions running through his head that it's hard to really pinpoint what exactly he's feeling. But whatever it is, his heart is beating hard in his chest with anticipation. Hoping it is, and hoping it isn't her.]

Tan-Tana? That you?

[restingstitchface]

[Crane doesn't say anything for a long while. He doesn't move, except to tuck his chin against his chest. There's a small smile on his face, barely visible before he conceals it. He wonders what it might be interpreted as.]

Yeah.

[Does anything else need saying? He's not sure.]

[Video] Crane'd: Bel-Shamharoth

[wizzardly]

[Rincewind has been taking free computer classes at the Nonah library. Today it's pretty much just him and a couple in their seventies who keep sending him dirty looks for asking questions. The class, unfortunately, has yet to cover the topic of click-bait, and the wizard has to wonder: why do doctors hate this man?

Oh, but there's a video? Well that's unexpect -

...Those... Those are tentacles. A great, writhing mass of them. Rincewind's mouth is already moving in silent horror as the shape (enormous, it doesn't fit on the screen, he can't imagine the height the camera must be at to capture even this much of the eldritch monstrosity) turns to make itself known. The wizard behold a multitude of mouths, whole chasms of teeth.

But there is only one gigantic eye.

No, no, no, it's impossible, not one of the Dark Gods, stop thinking it, stop even picturing it, don't you even think its name.

Naturally, Rincewind does all of these things at once, his panicked mind gibbering the titles the Dungeon Dimension creature has amassed over the centuries: The Soul Eater, The Sender of Eight, The Soul Render, Bel-Shamharoth - !

Rincewind claps a hand over his mouth to muffle his scream - he is, after all, in a library.]

[restingstitchface]

[Ah. One of his favorite subjects.

His most favorite patients manage to get Crane all excited. He inhales in satisfaction, his lips curling into a smile. If that comes out as any sight at all, it's probably a mass of tentacles writing or something.

Either way, Bel-Shamharoth mutters something; it goes against nature and everything Rincewind likely knows. But It's meant to be unfathomable, right?]

You are not an attractive single.

[Lonely eldrich abomination seeks partner for corrupting the innocent psa. Pls no timewasters.]

Video | Keicho Nijimura

[unbreaker]

[Josuke's not at all interested in Heropa's hot singles, but in an attempt to scroll past the obnoxiously bright colored and flashing link on the screen it appears as though he's clicked it instead! Just great. He expects some equally obnoxious popups as a result of his finger slip...but instead, the link disappears as if his attempt to be rid of it had been a success.

And in its place? Plays a video posted by a man he never thought he'd see again. Okuyasu's older brother. The one who had brought to Morioh the bow and arrow that had started everything and caused so much pain and trouble.]

Keicho.

[Josuke's voice is firm...but within it is a note of hesitation. How much will Keicho remember? Will he have the bow and arrow with him now? Will he still consider Josuke an enemy?]

[restingstitchface]

[ Crane's good mood from the past subjects he's encountered doing this doesn't make him receptive to the fact it's Josuke. He doesn't like being patronized. Coddled. Made to feel weak. Truth be told, it makes him rather venomous. His nails tap against the sides of his arms as he keeps it cool and polite.]

Oh. It's you.

[Rational. Calm. Merciless. Methodical. The traits are already there.]

Josuke.

video; private; The Darkness

[angelfire]

[ Crane hadn't been wrong. This was a message that he absolutely had to pick up, and it was because of his fear that he immediately responded by flipping to private. He wished he could make it more private than that, truly, but at the same time he wanted to be as far away from her as he possibly could be.

Maybe the other side of the known universe. Yes, that sounded like a grand idea.

Lucifer wanted to destroy humanity--she wanted to erase it. Humanity and everything else. And he thought: this is Dean's fault. He'd brought the Mark here, and now here she was, following it.

And Lucifer. Was. Afraid. Afraid of her, afraid of what she could do. He was going to kill Crane when he found out what was really being done to him. Maybe not kill him. Maybe torture him for a few millennia. But for now-- ]

I thought I'd feel you, when you escaped.

permaprivate

[restingstitchface]

[ It was rather cocky of Crane, to lure Lucifer in like this. But it was a curiosity on his part; he wanted to know. What Lucifer was scared of. What he would run from. What made him human. Weak and pitiful and everything else. He was older now. Nobody needed to goad him to action, because he could take it by himself.

And what sort of power made the Devil afraid? God's. Maybe he doesn't know enough at this moment, but he appreciates the irony, given how better he is than everyone else.]

My power functions much better when I don't have to flaunt it. I thought you'd know that more than anyone.

[There's familiarity on Lucifer's part. But the lesson of exerting power without beating someone or saying a word - being quiet - that's something he's learned from both Ra's and his great-grandmother, and learned for himself.]

video; Yellow Diamond

[oceanthief]

[it's almost unfair how easily Lapis falls for the trick. the technology of the communicator may be primitive by her standards, but the internet is a vast unexplored territory; with the point of cat videos having only recently been explained to her, what chance did she have of understanding what clickbait was?

so of course she taps it, with the same muted curiosity she explores everything on this device. and her entire body freezes as soon as the video starts - Lapis doesn't even need to see the other gem turn around to recognize that awful silhouette, that commanding presence that demanded perfect loyalty simply through existence.]

...Yellow Diamond.

[it's halfway between a whisper and the beginnings of a scream, the gears of Lapis' mind screeching against each other as they attempt to process the situation.

she knew that it was inevitable for other gems to come through someday: she wasn't lucky enough to be left alone for any significant length of time. but this was...this was the absolute worst possible way things could have unfolded. this earth was doomed, and so was she.]

[restingstitchface]

[ Fascinating. It's thrilling to see someone so frightened, so unable to control themselves. He turns up his nose. Lapis really ought to be more careful. Anyone could pick up those shattered pieces and manipulate her in any way.

He's silent for a little while. Then he asks, quietly.]

Oh. You're here.

Why are you talking to me?

Video; Maryann Forrester

[shifting]

- Jesus fucking Christ.

[Sam's free hand digs into the arm of his office chair, staring wide-eyed down at the video on his phone. Someone at the vineyard sent him some stupid internet link to a video of otters or cats or god knows what, and one wrong click has sent him here. To a video of her, looking way too goddamned alive for Sam's tastes. Especially considering that the last time he saw her, he crushed that black, shriveled organ she called a heart with his bare hand.

It had seemed only right, considering she'd stabbed him through his.

But Sam has to calm past his racing heart enough to speak - to ask. Because he's already run into someone wearing the face of a person from back home, and he needs to know before he goes off on the wrong woman (immortal, maenad):]

Maryann?

[restingstitchface]

[Safer not to answer this one till he's had a quick diversion to familiarize himself. He doesn't manage to find much, but at least he's caught a name. At the moment it's the only thing he has, but names have their uses. He keeps his tone calm and inoffensive enough.]

Sam?

[Video] Crane'd - Grant Ward

[morethan084]

[Daisy wasn't falling for those spam links, which is why she was quick to exit out. Only she accidentally clicked the link before doing so.]

Shit.

[She was about to exit out when a familiar face popped up on the screen, and she nearly dropped the communicator.]

Ward?

[Duh. Daisy remembered a while ago Jesse telling her that Ward had been here before, and then disappeared. Usually that meant going back home, but clearly that wasn't the case here. Or maybe he had come back and this was the first she was finding out about it.

Either way, this wasn't good. Especially when he was now capable of having powers, ones that she was sure would be dangerous ones.]

What the hell are you doing here?

[restingstitchface]

[Crane clears his throat. He doesn't know who Ward is, he'll have to read about him later, spy on some posts, but Daisy is somebody he's met before. He can very much control this situation.]

Fate brought me here. [Look at this smug fucker.] It's not what I was expecting but I'm going to make a real go of it. Though I should say Fate brought you here too?

[text] Clickbait Chat - Don't be A-Freud!

[dirtyredneck]

[Sometime after he'd managed to shake the vision of his brother off, another ad popped up. Two in one day was more than pushing his patience. So this time he decided instead of trying to close it, he'd tell whoever was sending this shit to fuck off.]

Fuck off.

[Short and to the point.]

[text]; permanon

[itistolaugh]

[ Oh heck, someone actually answered the damn thing. Alright, Harley, time to shine! ]

Unlock the key to your own health! TOTALLY FREE! Take control of your life TODAY!!

video; CRANE'D - Tatsuki Kaito

[hasitsthorns]

[ It's a slip of her fingers that causes Rose to click the unsuspecting spam link. She'd meant to scroll right on past, but here she is staring at the man who ruined her entire life. No. No, not him. He's dead. Rose made sure of that herself, yet... The resemblance his son had to his father was always striking.

Tatsuki Kaito, current CEO of the Hiromistsu corporation (too young to have taken over if his father hadn't been brutally murdered by her doing). The organization that seems legitimate and charitable on the surface, but it's ugly underbelly is a youkai fighting ring. Bored businessmen give themselves a thrill by watching 'creatures' (her kind, her years ago) fight one another to the death.

Her lips thin into a tight frown. The last time she'd seen Tatsuki, he'd shot a hole through Charlie's heart. He then wasted no time stabbing a poison dagger in hers and kicking her out the window of a Tokyo high rise. He looks just as calm and collected as always, asking casually for advice from these poor, unsuspecting people. ]

The last time we had words, you left me with quite a bit of heartache. [ Ha. Haha. Ha. Joking about it all is the only way she can keep herself together at the moment. ]

[restingstitchface]

[ Well, he's netted a new person. That's progress.

There's always something good about new blood for increasing one's amount of ideas. Controlled chaos, he liked to call it. The Joker would have words to say about that. Fortunately, he's not here. He slides his hands between his thighs and leans forward, a gentle smile on his face. Young and without suspicion, indeed. ]

Well, what can I say? It was business. The heart was made to be broken. Isn't that how the saying goes?

[watching video; voice reply] CRANE'D: The Portrait of Dorian Gray, brought to life by Toby's love

[hisheartsdesire]

[Toby's fallen for the clickbait before, and this probably won't be the last he falls for something like it. Because he's always been such a curious fellow and is still catching up with the times.

He's startled, of course, when he sees the old man. The old and decrepit Dorian Gray, with all the evils of his lover's sins etched upon him. It's not so much the Portrait's deeds that frighten him, nor the Portrait itself so much as what it stands for. Because the memory of that incident between the Portrait, Dorian, and him still haunts Toby to this day.

Dorian had to stop the Portrait, and the only way to do so was to break Toby's heart. And the things that Dorian said to Toby, the lies he'd told so Toby wouldn't love him and life would leave the Portrait... Toby doesn't think he could take it anymore.]

N-no... No, you can't be here... [What was it that brought the Portrait back to life again? It sounded so stupid at the time, what was it, some kind of stone...] You can't be real, you can't be alive...

[restingstitchface]

[ Exaggerated expressions. Stutters in his speech, when he's normally calm and collected. Cool. Casual to the point of being offensive. Too attached to Dorian to be able to focus properly on himself; with a constant fear of losing the relationship he has; or having it be betrayed.

It wouldn't at all be hard to guess that everything in Toby's life revolves around Dorian. His life begins and ends there. ]

Unfortunately, I am. Did you think I wouldn't exist here forever?

crane'd - charles augustus magnussen

[acclimatized]

[ sometimes, painstakingly typing a text message can result in the advertisement being accidentally clicked by a stray thumb. john's surprised the hot chatty singles have moved onto the network until a familiar face pops up on the feed and his blood runs cold. ]

You can't be serious.

[ john's aghast. it can't be him -- it can't be the man who gloated about tearing his entire life down in a few minutes and was gleeful over the fact. who put him in a fire for leverage. who had already ruined god knows how many other people's lives before sherlock put a bullet in his brain on christmas day. ]

[restingstitchface]

Ah. Dr Watson, I presume?

[Ok, that was a bad literary joke. But he had to do it.

Regardless, there's a calm, polite look on his face that's mirrored by his tone. He leans back against his chair, as far as it will take him, and steeples his fingers. Here John is, the bully who'd mocked him, utterly aghast. It warms his muscles and his bones and an utterly gleeful smile appears on his face.]

How are you doing these days?

[superposition]

[Qubit, of course, knows way better than to click on that bullshit, and normally he'd just ignore it. But normally, there's no spam or ads on this network, and given that you can access it with your brain... you just know some idiot is going to go and give themselves a computer virus. Better to shut this down ASAP.

Of course, since he's not on the network 24/7, this happens after it's already been up for a few hours. What can ya do.

Anyway, whatever's posting these spam links, it suddenly gets inundated with requests from an automated script trying to figure out whose device it's coming from. Get out here, Man Person Behind The Curtain.]

WHOOPS I FORGOT I WAS PART OF THIS POST

[itistolaugh]

[ Okay well.

1) that's just rude
2) like SUPER RUDE
3) he'll find multiple devices involved in this post, including
4) this one. hello. she is very innocent. ]

video; CRANE'D: freshly shot Carl Grimes w/ fellow undead behind him

[112ounces]

[ Unlike most people here, Carl knows that ads on the network are highly unusual and doesn't try to accidentally swipe it away. In fact, he doesn't recall anything of the sort being posted on the network since . . . well, since he first arrived. However, despite the longevity of his time here, he sometimes forgets the dangers of ads in one's device.

So he's one of the curious fools who actually pressed the ad, to see what happens -

- he sees himself. Dark hair turn darker with sweat, wet strands clinging to his neck like little thin claws. The hat is tilted upward: a dark, black halo, splattered in blood specks. Blood from the wound from Carl's face; a black hole of gore and bone, a cavern where a clear blue eye used to be. Lips blue, skin bone white: it's a dying corpse, a walker-to-be. Behind this dying Carl, there is the walking dead. They shamble around, sometimes they go out of view, and others come in. Enid. Daryl. Dad. Others, as well: Kaneda, Tetuso, Tex, as well as Lucifer and Peter Pan and Crane. Others Carl recognize, many others he does not.

His fingers are cold, he notices. His stomach churns. His throat dry. All signs he is still alive. ]

What are you?

[ Hushed voice. A voice in hiding. ]

[restingstitchface]

[Crane's lips open slightly. Tinged blue, unable to express themselves on one side. He then shakes his head, putting his opinions out in the open. Carl has so much running around inside his head.

... Shambling, really. He knows what somebody from that world would fear to see. Their own deaths. The deaths of their friends. Their enemies. Those monsters that shuffle around, pursuing the living relentlessly.]

You tell me.

You know what you see, Carl.