01 - video

[lovestoys]

[Okay so this tech? Rad as all hell. He has no idea how it works, how it's so slim lined and tiny, where the batteries go or why he even has it but it's so bitching, he's not even gonna protest it. His now. No backsies. Ever.

He doesn't quite get what's happening and he doesn't quite care so mostly, he's just looking to reach out. Communicate. Make friends. Maybe even a love connection cause, you know, yolo. Stranger things have happened. The video is on him and yes, he's rocking an awful outfit of blue and yellow and yes, he doesn't pull it off at all. Does he care? Naaaah. He grins an obnoxious grin that will kind of make you want to punch his little gremlin face in.

He decides to go with a time tested and flawless way to both express his interest in all these glorious people, all at once, and convey the right depth and emotions required for a first intro.]

Wazzzzzzzzup?!

[Nailed it, yo.]

This place is so dope! This is the Trickster comin' atcha and I am delighted to be here. How are you beautiful people?

Comments

[lovestoys]

It's a pet name, girl. It's cute. [You should dig it. Isn't it flattering? Isn't the dumpster gremlin the coolest and smoothest??]

Party. You know, get doooown.

[mostlysunny]

Ew. [It's a whisper, but it's not a quiet enough whisper that it won't get picked up.]

Okay, I think the answer is no. That seems like the safe answer. Yeah, no. I'm not. No. Is that...really how you try to pick up girls? Give them nicknames they don't want and asking if they're down to party? How's that working out?

[lovestoys]

It always works for me. [It doesn't. It really doesn't. He will officially die alone.] Are you not into partying? That's cool, babe. I get it. Not everyone is up for getting down and that's your deal, y'know? I get it. You want something a little more quiet.

Intimate. [Suggestive look.] I can so do that.

[mostlysunny]

Wow. [The gross relentless determination and confidence. It's almost? Cute? In a badly-trained puppy way? But it's also really gross. Mostly it's that second one. It might be morbid curiosity keeping her going now.

And a smidge of the kindhearted nature that makes Ms. Grant despair of her assistant ever achieving true cutthroat status. She does like puppies, after all.]

So do you get hit a lot, or do most people just sort of walk away?

[lovestoys]

I get all kinds of girls, they love my style. You know? Ladies love a bit of the Ax-man.

[Ladies do not. Ladies never have. But if he admits he strikes out every time a girl so much as comes near him, how would that ever help him pull? He has to look cool, in control and skilled.]

How about you?

[mostlysunny]

Okay.

[As neutral as possible. Because really, wow. But then there's a glimmer of hope, there's a question. Which she answers automatically, and it probably isn't at all what he meant.]

Oh, I get hit all the time, but I'm usually the one walking away. ...er, or, um. How about me what?

[lovestoys]

Do you love a bit of the Ax-man?

[Of course he was going there. Of course he was asking that. It wasn't incredibly inappropriate, awkward and unpleasant at all.]

I bet you get hit on all the time, you're like model hot.

[mostlysunny]

Nnnnnn—ugh.

[There was a glimmer of hope and then it was snuffed out by the unavoidable reality. No, no no no, this cannot go on, the light she gives off apparently turns red when she's embarrassed and blushing and that isn't a discovery she'd wanted to make, time to go bye.]

I should. Go. Good luck with... [Vague gestures at all of him. Good luck with whatever that is.] Nice meeting you bye!

[And the screen goes dark before either of them can continue this train wreck. It's for the best, okay.]