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[snarkbot]

[ Skeets is holding his communicator in one of his little robot claws, mostly so he can let himself be seen on video. Which is to say that he's a small, gold robot with wing flaps. ]

Greetings, network. I seem to have lost my photogenic companion Booster Gold, so I’ll just introduce myself. I am Skeets, a BX9 security robot 2.0 and artificial intelligence.

[ He pauses before adding an addendum with some robotic smugness:] Professor Skeets, actually. I’m pleased to make all of your acquaintances.

[ A local bystander comes up with a phone. "Are you a real robot? You’re an imPort, right?" ]

Yes, ma’am, but I’m in the middle of something –-

[ "Can I take your picture? Oh, you’re so cute!" ]

…If you’ll excuse me, ma’am.

[ And Skeets flies up to rooftop height before continuing his post as if there hadn’t been any interruption. ]

I’d also like some assistance. It appears that the Porter granted me the ability to assume a human form. For the record, Porter, this is unnecessary. I’m a proud, independent robot who needs no limbs.

That aside, I’m having difficulties with my balance and if anyone has any tips for walking on two legs, I’d appreciate it. There aren’t any tutorials on how to be a human on wikiHow. Shocking, I know.

Comments

[snarkbot]

You're too kind, Mr. Reyes. Luckily I do not require much. [ Pause. ] But I may need to find someone who is capable of repairing me if necessary. Though Mr. Kord may be able to.

[khajidont]

I think Ted's probably your best bet there. I mean, there are a bunch of other technological geniuses around, but I bet you trust him the most for something like that, right? If he's not around...

[He frowns.]

I mean, the Scarab could probably guide me through it, in a pinch. You don't have any reason to need repairs right now, though, right? You're looking...

[Good? How can he tell? He looks like a robot. Something could be misfiring in there and he'd be none the wiser.]

...shiny.

[Nailed it.]

[snarkbot]

Thank you for noticing, sir. I do indeed have a clean bill of health; I am only taking into account the possibilities.

While I would go to Mr. Kord first, it may be worth noting who these other technological geniuses are. Are there any you trust, sir?

[khajidont]

Most of the people I can think of have been ported out. Let's cross that bridge when we get to it okay?

Besides maybe if you get damaged you can go into human form and it won't be. Unless you think it would like manifest with no legs or something? I don't know how this stuff works.

[snarkbot]

I am not entirely sure either, sir. We can table subject for now. It is not entirely pleasant to think about, either.

[khajidont]

If anything happens I promise me and Ted will have your back and we'll work it out. That's the best we can do I think. In the meantime you just gotta focus on figuring out how to be human if you even want to.

I suggest eating, by the way. I think it's everyone's favourite part of being human

[snarkbot]

[ There are several criticisms one could make about Booster Gold, but as far as Skeets was concerned he always made sure to get him working again. It was touching how the beetles stepped into that role.

He shouldn't be getting emotional like this, he should be programmed to react like that. Not that his emotions were in any way obvious. ]

Thank you, sir.

Do you have any restaurants or dishes you would suggest?

[khajidont]

Depending on where you are, yeah. I kinda scoped out the best places [cheap places] in every city by now. But... you know, if you wanna head over this way someday, you can always just try homemade instead.

[snarkbot]

Are you inviting me to dinner, sir?

[khajidont]

Well, yeah, I am. Why not?

[snarkbot]

[ Well, it's a first. ]

I would be delighted, Mr. Reyes.

[khajidont]

Awesome! Just let me know when you wanna come by, and I'll make sure there's something good for you. Do you... have any idea what you'd want to eat? Like, have you ever seen Booster eat something and think, man, I wish I had taste receptors?

[snarkbot]

[ Incredulously: ] You think watching Booster eat anything made me want to try it myself?

[khajidont]

Is he a really messy eater or something?

[snarkbot]

Two words, sir: kale milkshake.

[khajidont]

You poor robot.

We'll show you some real food, I promise.

[snarkbot]

I suffer with dignity, sir.

I may yet take you up on it, thank you.

[khajidont]

You just let me know. In the meantime, I'll let you get back to the whole dealing with being human thing. Good luck with your classes!