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[hardedged]

[ hello, heroes. it's been a while since jessica jones popped up on the network. months, in fact. while she prefers to wallow in misery, an urgent need has compelled her presence tonight. namely booze. she's running out of cash, and she's too proud to beg for a drink. desperate times and all.

along with her post, there's an attachment with her phone number and directions to her address — a small, crapass apartment in maurtia falls. it's apt, if you know her. ]

Never been great at this PR shit, but here goes nothing.

Opened a business. While back. Alias Investigations.

Name's Jessica Jones. Private investigator. Reasonable rates. Damn good at what I do. Ask around if you want.

Trying to find a missing person? Or looking to catch a cheating asshole in the act? Come on in.

[ #nailedit ]

Comments

his comm ID has both his name and codename btw!

[shutterbugged]

Peter Parker?

We went to high school together? In my universe, anyway. We didn't talk much but I think you sat behind me in one of my classes...any of this ringing a bell?

[ He's saving the "also I was and technically still am on a super-team with your husband" part until he's figured out where on her timeline she is. ]

sounds good! i'm sorry for her, peter

[hardedged]

Yep. You're crazy.

[ no classmate from her world that fits that description. and well, the peter parker from her world is much younger, not to mention a stranger, while the spider-man there is a bit ahead of her time. ]

[shutterbugged]

[ Wow. Matt wasn't kidding when he said the Jessica of their universe had mellowed after switching from a mature to an all-ages book since she and Luke got together. ]

Okay, look. You're here, so you're familiar with the idea of alternate universes. A lot of imPorts here have home universes which are variants of each other, so...I guess in yours we haven't crossed paths yet. Or I live in Newark and we're never going to meet because who would willingly go to Newark who doesn't live there, anyway? Or my dad had a childhood accident with a backyard croquet set and I don't exist.

Do they have an Avengers, where you're from? Captain America, Iron Man, Hulk, all those guys? [ Those seem to be the names that come up most often. ] Or the names Luke Cage and Matt Murdock, do those ring a bell?

[hardedged]

[ yes, most of those names ring a bell, though she'd rather dismiss this conversation before it even begins. but ah, there peter goes, saying the magic words. ]

What about Luke?

[shutterbugged]

He's a mutual acquaintance. An old friend I haven't seen in way longer than I should've.

[ Almost six years! Dang. ]

[hardedged]

Doubt he'd hang out with a guy named after a bug.

[ what kind of crapass name is spider-man, anyway? ]

[shutterbugged]

Hey, I have it on good authority that he thinks I'm the man.
Lowercase the man, not The Man.
Well, maybe in most demographic respects, but that's not really the point I was trying to make...

Anyway, point is, yes we're friends, and in my universe so are me and you. Sorry if that weirds you out.

[ Uh, it's better than Jewel?? or Knightress??? ]

[hardedged]

[ #RUDE ]

Whatever. You're not the first asshole to tell me this shit. Just get one thing through your thick head now. I'm not the Jessica Jones you know.

[ for one, she doesn't have friends. gross. ]

[shutterbugged]

Believe me, Jess, I noticed.

[ Ooooh you made him mad--well, mildly testy. Still, an accomplishment! ]

[hardedged]

[ just as planned. ]

Good. So back off already.

[shutterbugged]

Since you asked so nicely.

If you change your mind and need some questions answered, you know where to find me.