Not at all. I'm talking the kind of hobbies people try to be passably okay at, because training for any of them implies a poor sense of time and effort management. Karaoke. Mini-golf. Bumper lane bowling. A great SAT score that would make people realize you're smarter than you let yourself appear to be, thus making it harder to take advantage of their expectations...

Incidentally, the first three are perfect venues for casual dating because it sets a low bar.

[Is that a suggestive hint? It could or could not be a hint.]

You need to find something you would enjoy being bad at. Something that doesn't trigger your need to put 100% of your glistening muscles behind it. And you'll want to let other people watch you do it, to talk about it and learn to loosen up.

[Also if that means she gets to see him flexing his, uh, emotional muscles, she could count that as part of her job]