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[lesterzeppelin]

[ An alternate world
all new rules to remember
get me outta here!!

Or at least out of his current government conspiracy-related mess... the guy on screen waves at the camera, suddenly a little nervous despite initiating the broadcast. ]

I know you guys get questions all the time, so I'll keep this brief. One, anyone know why most of my musical favorites went MIA? I was gonna jam out to my usual, but no. The song doesn't seem to exist, let alone the band. Ditto for Youtube and Spotify - what's that about? Surely this world's got some sense of taste.

Oh, and second, I've been here maybe less than a day and I'm already way past my job. I'd get out of this assigned gig, except it turns out things like "money" and "food" are essential. [ . . . ] So do me a solid. Be somewhat better than the "American Idol" hopefuls I've seen this week, or you know, offer me something better than giving a bunch of kids music lessons.

[ Because there has to be better gigs out there, right....? ]

Comments

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[fehus]

That was a kind of high-handed way to ask for a job?

Um, to answer your question, alternate universe, alternate musical hits timeline. So like, the Beach Boys are now the Lakeside Ladies.

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[lesterzeppelin]

Oh. [ Right, mortals have a different way of asking for a job, don't they... What was that word again? Humility? ] I should've gone with the "I'm literally not supposed to be teaching music right now" approach, huh?

That... is oddly depressing, but thanks for the heads-up.

Video;

[pocketfulof]

Da--[Grinding halt. Nope. Nope. This may be his dad, but it is definitely still awkward to call him that when he was...Well, this mortal kid.]

Apollo [Not any better.] Uh...when did you get here?

Sorry about the job. The government kind of puts you where they think you'll fit best. I'm on a psychic hotline...

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[lesterzeppelin]

Will!!

[ Any worries, any fears about his gig and his impending doom have pretty much melted away with the all-too familiar sight. Lester grins. ]

Last night? This morning? Time kind of blurs together, and it's not like the job's your fault. I wouldn't have minded teaching you or anyone uh... [how should he put this... ] more musically-inclined.

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[heliophilic]

Why not go into the purse-saving business. You did such a great job last time.

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[lesterzeppelin]

That was a one-time only deal, and we both know it. [ Hmph. ] Unless you'd like music lessons, waffle-man.

video;

[ambasciatore]

Are you saying you, a mere mortal, are better then other mere mortals?

Apollo, your humility is astounding.

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[lesterzeppelin]

Well... [ Actually, yeah, when it comes to music, he is better than other mortals. ] Even you've gotta admit that I'm past beginner piano lessons.

Unless that was your not-so-subtle way of asking for them, and then the answer's always yes.

[yaaas_queen]

[Even with a network video she's still somehow glued to her phone and tapping as she chats]

We're talking missing in action and not "Paper Planes" MIA. Because I checked and those gunshot sounds are all coming up blank...

[lesterzeppelin]

[ Impressive. Lester raises both eyebrows at her, ]

Gods, I wish they'd all just taken a cue from M.I.A. It'd make more sense than say, trying to "Schmoogle" Shut Up and Dance and finding nada.

text

[4thdimensional]

The musical history of this world is...shall I say very out of sync with the Earth I came from. Disco has lasted far longer, and rock and roll faded into obscurity.

My first assignment was at a disco, actually, and it was terrible. I left it for freelance repair work, then teaching. You're free to move to any occupation you like, or even move to a city with industry that suits you better---but it's more complicated if you didn't register.

text

[lesterzeppelin]

Really? Disco's deader than dead where I'm from. Not that I particularly mind. :/

[ some things should stay buried in a time capsule, bro. ]

Well, hey! That gives me hope that I'm not stuck in this store forever. And let me guess, complicated since the government can't keep tabs on you? I got that impression just from the initial speech.

voice

[killtime]

A kid called "Apollo." Teaching music. They didn't even try to be subtle, did they.

voice

[lesterzeppelin]

My legal name's - [ he groans, ] Lester, but yeah. The government's gotta love irony.

video

[curiosityvoyage]

It's an alternate universe. Its tastes aren't the same as your world's.

[For someone who's only been in a brave new world for a month, Dustin seems very cool with the whole thing. But he pauses a little, and has to ask:] What's Spotify? And "American Idol"?

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[lesterzeppelin]

Yeah, I'm starting to figure that out.

[ Lester sighs, folding his arms - this world's got some serious atoning to do, regarding its lack of taste. And pop culture. ]

Spotify's like a music streaming service. You download it onto your phone and BAM, music all day every day. Whereas American Idol's a TV show where people compete to... be the best singer? Or get an album? I don't know, that part's always been a little murky.

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[sanguinespell]

The music selection here is killing me. Is there even knockoff Spotify?

[She hasn't really had access to her jams for at least a couple of days back home, never mind the time since she got here but--]

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[lesterzeppelin]

If there is, I haven't found it yet. [ beat ] I have, however, uncovered the joy of what this world calls "Sulfur Mustard".

[ So he links the symphonic power metal, fully highlighting that yes, that IS Count Dooku frontlining them. ]

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[littlemissfutility]

[Dubious. So dubious. There's being confident, and then there's being cocky, and this guy's definitely hitting the latter. ]

That's the point of music lessons--if they were already perfect, they wouldn't need you.

video.

[lesterzeppelin]

[ If there's anything Lester loves, it's flattery (even the backhanded kind). He blinks back genuine surprise, ]

Really? Those sad people need my expertise?

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[pummelgranite]

[ lounging on a throne of flowers and animal bones, as one does during Important Selfie Time ]

I can always use more roadies. Can you lift 50 pounds?

VIDEO

[lesterzeppelin]

[ As flattered as he would have normally been, Lester is painfully aware of his shortcomings. He waves one very gangly, stick-thin arm to prove his point - ]

Lady, do I look like I can lift fifty pounds?

[ghoulking]

This world has a version of most things and people, but often with a different name. So perhaps they aren't MIA, simply misnamed.

And you are allowed to change jobs whenever you want. ImPorts have most of the job market at their feet, so anything that interests you might be easy to find.

[lesterzeppelin]

So... we command the job market because we were kidnapped?

[ Lester's heard of stranger things, but man, he's never going to understand mortals. Giving people fame for something that none of them chose. It would be like worshipping Lester because he crash-landed in a dumpster... ]

Thanks, I think. Where do most people start looking for jobs?

[beyourzoomer]

I don't know what Youtube and Spotify are, but if you don't like your job you could get up at 4 AM and deliver newspapers.

[lesterzeppelin]

Oh, hey! Mad Max! [ Lester grins, ] Youtube and Spotify are just music streaming services. You download them on your phone or device, or pull them up on your computer, and listen.

I think I'm gonna pass on the 4 am deliveries. But if you want music lessons, I'll offer 'em to you for free. No strings attached.

[plasticbow]

Let me guess. You like music.

Just not enough to teach it to little kids?

[lesterzeppelin]

More like I literally can't play an instrument. Swore on the Styx and everything.

Can't really teach a kid if I can't show them how the song's supposed to sound, right?

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[dejerate]

No idea which music was your favourite but. Yeah some things might be different here. Especially if you are from some different time. But some stuff might just have another name?

As for the jobs, depends what you want to do? No idea what that idol thing is but. Kids aren't so bad?

[Yuu gives a shrug. But then maybe he is kinda biased in his wanting to help look out for kids and do better by them than what he got with his childhood.

Which. Isn't that hard, really.]

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[lesterzeppelin]

Yeah, I just realized Youtube's now Bluetube. Going all opposite on us...

[ Not that he minds, if he's ready to jam to his favorites. ]

Oh, it's definitely not the kidlets, even if some of them are like, off-tune and off-key and off-pitch all at once. [ beat ] Which, by the way, should be impossible.

[ Video ]

[battysitter]

What's youtube? [ that's not just it ] And Spotify?

I'm not even going to ask about American Idol because it sounds dumb just from the name.

[ Video ]

[lesterzeppelin]

Wow, how many of you guys were deprived of sheer awesome?

[ Lester whistles softly, ] Youtube's a video streaming service. Spotify's a music streaming service. Think of Youtube like... like MTV on Demand, and Spotify as an infinite mixtape, and you've got the right idea.

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[specialise]

[ raven narrows her eyes in confusion. what the hell is a you doing on a tube? a spotify? ugh, people of the pre-apocalyptic shithole she comes from. their worries are so easy. ]

You expect people to give you a job without a list of your skillsets?

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[lesterzeppelin]

I don't know. I've never had to worry about a job before.

[ And he certainly doesn't plan on starting now! ]

But if you're curious, those skills would be music, medicine, poetry, truth, reason, and.... [ he mimics a drumroll, ] prophecy. Or well, it was prophecy before I got sucked in here.