maskormenace | 001

[There's the sound of some fumbling with the communicator as someone struggles to get the thing oriented and recording. For a moment, there's a flash of one giant, emerald green eye close up to the lens as the owner inspects the device.]

Is this...is this thing on? Is it recording...? Gods dammit...how the hell...

[More fumbling. Then another voice offscreen can be heard: 'Hey boss, you want me to show you how to--']

No. Look, I got this. Go over there and finish checking the inventory and let me--

[Finally, he manages to get the comm aligned and recording. The blue haired newcomer looks absolutely exasperated.]

Okay, I think I've got it. Anyway, I'm not sure who all can see this? But I'm having some issues here. Now, I, for one, am glad that I was provided employment upon working here. I kinda wish it was more in my field, but hey, beggars can't be choosers, am I right? I've run a shop before. I know business. I know how to sell. I can sell a full set of plate mail to an eighty year old wind mage. My point? I can do this job. Here's the problem:

[Darin tilts his comm to show his store, namely the Thot Topic in Nonah that he has been given management of. The store is in great shape and people are shopping and being helped by the staff. But over by the entrance there stands three seemingly disaffected teens. Two girls and a guy, and they are all taptaptapping away at their phones.]

Can someone explain to me what the hell is happening here? They've been here for hours. They're here every other day, it seems. They don't talk. The best part? Hang on.

[Okay, looks like we're moving now. Darin walks over to the group and not-so-discreetly circles them while holding his comm aloft. Maybe some eagle-eyed viewers might catch one of them texting 'omg, the old blue haired guy is back guys lmao' before Darin walks back to his original position towards the back of the store.]

Did you catch that? Did you? They're sending those messages to each other. They're talking to each other! Through their little devices! Instead of using words! Culture shock my ass, is there a priest or something out there? Because I think these kids are possessed and I do not deal with ghosts. Seriously, if anyone can offer me any insight into what the hell is wrong here, I will give you ten percent off of whatever the hell you want from my store. Hell, make it twenty percent.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

Yeah, that was the first thing I did when I took over. That's practically beginner's guide to business. I recognized one of the logos on their shirts and tried to show them what I had in stock to match. Know what I got in return?

Picture a deer staring at you. Except, instead of being wide-eyed and alert, it's like they were stuck in a perpetual state of 'just waking up.'

I even offered them free rewards cards. You know, keep 'em coming back. Now they come back but they just...shamble.

Is my store cursed? Because when I was their age I was personally fitting half of the royal guard for replacement pauldrons.

Yeah, we're kind of in this weird place now where kids don't have to start working early on to help support their families. They're encouraged to be kids for as long as they can. Whatever that means.

But I think I know one sure-fire way to chase them off. You've given me some inspiration. Try asking them if they want a job.

[Darin looks skeptical for a second, then holds up a finger.]

One second.

[He makes his way over to the group of teens. He can be seen offering them his business card, then motioning over towards the register.]

[And just like that, the entire group scatters and leaves.]

[Dumbfounded, he walks back.]

I seriously cannot believe that worked.

If that hadn't of worked you would have never gotten rid of them. But I was pretty sure it would.

Congrats on becoming teenager repellent. I'm sure they'll spread the word to their friends.

I don't want to be a repellent. I'd prefer t just be acknowledged.

Either way, thanks for the help. You deal with teenagers often, stranger?

Good luck with that.

[He thinks of Jenny for a brief moment and shakes his head.]

Not anymore. I've been traveling in adult only circles for awhile now.

Yeah? What do you do?

[He pauses.]

Oh, hey...geez. Sorry, I should introduce myself.

I'm Darin Altway, Master Blacksmith. S'nice to meet you.

A little this. A little that.

I'm Nonah News' Weatherman by morning and a waiter at re:Cafe for the remaining hours of most days. You should come in sometime if you're ever in the neighborhood.

I'm Andrew Pulaski. It's good to meet you too.

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