THE MAJORITY REPORT: SEPTEMBER 20TH, 2018

[maskormods]

THE MAJORITY REPORT: SEPTEMBER 20TH, 2018Have you looked up recently?

DISCOUNTED SENIOR CITIZEN
As seen in the human interest section of Maurtia Falls's city paper:
Recent reports of a mysterious helper are popping up all over Maurtia Falls. One woman reported that a mysterious wanderer offered her an umbrella during a freak storm, but she found that the umbrella happened to get caught in the wind -- when she called us from outside the county lines. Another reported that he'd been given a free drink -- but later he found himself getting into a fight, that he won; although we received his report from jail, where he's serving time for aggravated assault. More reports of the Wanderer both helping and harming seem to be cropping up all over the city. Although when asked what he looked like, nobody seemed to be able to offer much of a description, beyond "kind of old".

Have you had an encounter with this mysterious Wanderer? Please contact the Maurtia Falls Register for more information...

GET THE AEGIST
As seen in official press release picked up by all major news outlets:
PRESS RELEASE FROM AEGIS FORCE: An explanation has been found for the tragic events of the Shimmer event that struck De Chima this July. ImPort heroes, including Aegis agent Lucina and Justice League member Laurie Collins, have identified scientists from the research company Pandora R&D as the culprits, acting as a splinter cell from the Otherworld Technologies Organization (OTO). The scientists illegally constructed a replica Porter powered by an artifact from the entity known as Atropos, with the intent of using it to send imPorts away from this universe. Instead, their experiment went out of control, causing the reality-distortions and mutations known as the Shimmer, leaving six hundred dead. The Pandora scientists did not survive the event.

Aegis Force remains committed to preventing further such tragedies from being inflicted on imPorts and natives alike, and continues to actively investigate Atropos and the OTO. If you or anyone you know would like to contact Aegis Force with questions or information, the team can be reached at this hotline.

TOTAL ECLIPSE OF THE CHARTS
As seen in TMI, both the online blog and their print publication:
Have you heard the new hit from hip hop artist Bunny? A vicious slam against Nonah Ambassador Galla in her single, Ain't No Galla Back Girl has rocketed Bunny's name through the zenith of Bwitter trends. Critics have sprouted praise over the blood-and-gore R-rated video featuring Nonah in a post-apocalyptic, anarchistic solarpunk setting:

"A stunning work!"
"Provocative!"
"Truly the greatest music video of 2018!"
"Downright daring."

Not all critics come singing praises, however. A few notable voices have criticized Bunny's blatant targeting of an imPort authority, claiming she will provoke a new kind of wrath. Needless to say, Bunny's audience awaits with baited breath.

CODE SWITCH
The Homeland Security Advisory System has moved from THAT'S WHAT SHE RED to A BIG PIZZA PIE because that's amore.

WANT TO SUBMIT TO THE MAJORITY REPORT?
The Majority Report comes out the 10th and 20th of every month. You may find details and submit here. The cut-off time is 12:01 AM PST on the 9th and the 19th for the corresponding dates.