14. Miser-cheese Loves Company (topped with 3 kinds of cheese)

[continuousgroaning]

[Tina decides to do this post in text; otherwise it'd be hard to hide how torn she still is about this idea.]

Mom and I are going to be moving to Heropa soon.

not right away, we need time to pack and find a house and everything, but maurtia falls isn't safe for me any more

I still like it there but i can't defend myself well, and I can't have people around me to protect me 24 hours a day, so it feels like the longer i'm there the more likely it is that something bad's going to happen

so be prepared!! the Tina tornado is going to take heropa by storm!!! and the linda... lightning bolt??

let me know what's good there as far as shopping and entertainment and stuff too

Comments

[symphonyinme]

Ha! How 'bout a Mind Your Beesiness Burger, with honey. And maybe some extra toothpicks.

[But talking about puns- oof, it does hit home. Bobby and even Louise's revised, dirty version of them. She's going to tear up here, too. So she gives a full body shake- rattling Tina along with her- and carries on.]

But why there, anyway? I'm happy where you wanna go. Just wanna know.

[continuousgroaning]

Or... or... Pico Suave. With pico de gallo on top. It'll be a hit.

[Tina patiently allows her mom to shake her, before just resting against her, closing her eyes.]

I'm happy right where we are. I have you, I have good friends, I have a boyfriend who adores me. But it's not safe for us here any more, either. I don't want something bad to happen to you. ... or to me, come to think of it.

[symphonyinme]

Aw, sweetie. That's- it's really mature. Thinking about what could happen instead of just what you want to. I'm so proud- you've just grown so much-

Oh, my Tiny Tina's all Tall now.

[Crushing hug begins now.]

[continuousgroaning]

[And Tina lets her mom do so. She knows that, no matter what, she is so lucky to have a mom who loves her and is here for her.]

... I kinda miss being Teeny Tina, though. It's weird to think about how much I've grown lately.

[symphonyinme]

Don't worry, you'll always be Teeny to me. Even when you've got your own Tinier Tinas. That's the deal.

[And one that will only matter back home, she's learned. Not that she wants Tina to grow too old here, without the rest of the family.]

But, ugh! Okay! Just gonna be you and me for once, huh? In our new place?

[continuousgroaning]

And I'm sure you're going to love being a grandma. My future kids are going to be spoiled absolutely rotten.

[The future kids she'd been so sure she was going to have with Jimmy Jr., Tina thinks. But she doesn't feel a pang of sadness like she might have, once upon a time. Was she really over him? It's a thought she'll have to table and unpack later.]

Uh-huh. If we take one of the government-provided houses they might give us housemates, but... it'll be the two of us at first. We can make everything how we want it, and watch whatever we want on TV... it's going to be nice.

[symphonyinme]

Oh! We can watch that romance island thing. That bachelor boy has a beauty booty.

[Not as good as Poe's on TV, sure, but it's better when she doesn't actually know the guy. Makes it more fun instead of creeping.]

We can do a whole marathon while unpacking.

[continuousgroaning]

Mmmm...

[Tina might be daydreaming about butts briefly. She hasn't done so in forever.]

Just be sure we have some tissues on hand. I always end up crying, especially when it gets close to the end.

[symphonyinme]

That's because you've got my romantic heart, honey. All those gals in love that gotta be let go. They should get to give him a good punch at the end!

[Reasons why Linda shouldn't run reality TV shows- or really should. Every one would be a Bachelor/American Gladiator crossover.]

[continuousgroaning]

[Tina laughs aloud at that.]

Or they should get to, like, push him into the fountain or something. Just a succession of the rejected ones pushing him in like it's a big dunk tank.

[symphonyinme]

Ooooh, they could make it a real one! Throw a ball and dunk him in some pee-pee. Or a nest of angry bees. Bee-bee!

[What were they talking about, again? Linda is too lost in cackling at this amazing new TV show they are developing. She might write a TV studio a letter to let them host it.]

[continuousgroaning]

That sounds more like a horror show. But it would be an unexpected twist. And I'm sure it would make the rejected contestants feel better. I mean, I know I would, at least.

[symphonyinme]

Yeah, that's what it's about, hun. Winners feel good all the time. It's the people that miss out we gotta help.

[continuousgroaning]

[Feeling a sudden wave of affection for her mother at those words, Tina leans against her and cuddles in as best she can.]

... I love you, Mom. I'm glad you're back.