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[adamantlyardent]

Here's my bit of charity to you, named and nameless collective of the stranded:
A theater class has issued the assignment to design and perform scenes of each student's own making, and, to no one's shock, many are deciding they're going to be making up bits based on imPorts. Rather, what they know or WANT to believe they know of them, and gods already know how dreadful an assessment PROFESSIONALLY published works are in that regard.

You're welcome to provide me with information of what you are...or are NOT, that I may, perhaps, educate or mitigate the onslaught of amateur theater to come in the following weeks. Doubtless you've seen rumors of yourself littering the shopping markets.

I'd lament that art is dead here, but I've been told washroom facilities are displayed as museum pieces here, so what would I even know about it. Humans are weird.

Comments

text;

[plentystrong]

i'm a great and fearsome warrior goddess who wins every fight she's in

[ Look this is like, her ONE CHANCE at a reputation of Ultimate Coolness mmkay. ]

[adamantlyardent]

Is that so. How strange to have never heard of such in all of the volumes of gossip and discussion on our community thusfar; perhaps you've been slacking on grand deeds of strength and a warrior's valor.

[plentystrong]

guess you missed my network video then

[ She attaches a lionk. ]

[adamantlyardent]

[................................................................................................................................................................................i'm sorry, what.]

[adamantlyardent]

Never knew goddesses shivered in the cold.

[plentystrong]

guess the porter stuck me in a mortal body or something

also can you not just broadcast that on the network!!!!

[adamantlyardent]

Unless I today discover a god of the winter winds who enjoys knocking warrior-sorts down a peg, I think you'll be fine.
Though I suppose I must now keep an eye on the girl who is oddly obsessed with cat memorabilia in my class; you may be a prime target for this assignment.

[VOICE]

[forgeabettertomorrow]

People seem to think I use my smithing hammer as a weapon and that it returns to me when I call it.

It doesn't even have a name.

It's literally just a hammer.

I have an actual sword, dammit! I don't just punch things and I've definitely never yelled "It's hammer time!"

[adamantlyardent]

To be fair, it does sound like something you would yell. Or have yelled in the past.

[forgeabettertomorrow]

I've definitely yelled 'It's time to temper your mood.' I can't get away from that one.

Let's see...

Oh, yeah, here's something I've seen. People seem to think my forge is like some mythical place. Which, I mean, it's flattering? But it's literally a converted warehouse in Nonah. People can just stop by. I'm not hammering away in the heart of a dying star or something like that.

I really want to know where people come up with this crap.

[adamantlyardent]

It's mythology. This world has old tales of gods who live and work in magic forges, crafting weapons for war gods and heroes and such.
I assume they'd rather associate you with something that's familiar despite being fantastical, rather than accept the mundane truths.

[forgeabettertomorrow]

...Hey, I'm not that mundane.

[adamantlyardent]

You can't have it both ways with these people, Darin: Either you're some legendary figure long foretold and revered or you're just some guy with weird clothes. Middle ground is very limited in the sensibilities of these people.

[youresovein]

But what if I WANT to see the rumors fly? Theatre doesn't need to be accurate!

[adamantlyardent]

Then by all means, let these kids' imaginations fly free with your image. I won't tell you NOT to, though I can't imagine being flattered by it at all myself.

[youresovein]

There's a saying that no publicity is bad publicity. I don't fully subscribe to that school of thought myself, but there's something quite satisfying about knowing I'm occupying space in people's thoughts.

[adamantlyardent]

It's kind of creepy. Especially if it's unsavory people -- why would I enjoy lingering in the thoughts of a lecher or a creep? Just the thought makes me shudder.

[youresovein]

Well, I hadn't considered that. I suppose there are people for whom that might be a concern...

[adamantlyardent]

I assume that means it's not at all for the sort of person you are? How fortunate for you.

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[pullsheavendown]

They're not making anything up based on me
Right

[adamantlyardent]

Not that I've heard.
But there's magazines that have that covered already, so it's perhaps just a matter of time. There was actually an unsettlingly lengthy opinion essay regarding your talents in conjuring sweets that was convinced you were intending to send local businesses into financial ruin.
I've known paranoid sorts before, but never have I read something so palpably unsteady.

[pullsheavendown]

Wait WHAT
How would that even work
My job is at an actual ice cream shop, I already sell ice cream
The extra is just stuff I give away to people I know

[adamantlyardent]

I'm far from an economist, and I assume the writer is, as well.
But since it was a dry economics piece, I doubt any of the others in my class will be scouring it for inspiration. You're probably safe unless someone with a camera gets paid to follow you around for a day.

[pullsheavendown]

I was going to say that sounds good until you added that last part
Why are they so interested in us anyway
We're not that exciting
We're just people

[adamantlyardent]

I can't prove it, but I BET it's the stink of this place. Something in the air addling the brains of the humans here, making them do the most peculiar things. Don't you think?