FUUUUUUCK YOOOOOOOU

[redwarhawk]

[Image via Text App: A scowling, redheaded woman in cutoff shorts, sleeveless button-down flannel and biker boots crouched next to a motorcycle with a significant dent in one of the chromed panels. She is wearing dark mirrored sunglasses and flipping double birds.

Most of the sign for Red's Roadkill Grill is visible behind her.]

Caption: WHOEVER YOU ARE, YOU PARK LIKE AN ASSHOLE,. I WILL FIND YOU AND I WILL GUY YOU LIKE A FISH.

Comments

text; un: Julian Delphiki | Bean

[justlittle]

Maybe park further away next time.

Re: text; un: Julian Delphiki | Bean

[redwarhawk]

[Aw, fuck. She can't yell at a kid that's fucked up, also, well...]

Pretty sure your alibi is something like "Fortunately, I was in bed, asleep. And 12."

So butt out, shortstack.

[justlittle]

Nine, actually. [ He pauses, thinks. ] Maybe ten by now.

[ The problems of not knowing your own birthday. ]

And yeah, that's a pretty good alibi. Can't do that kind of damage with a hoverbike.

[redwarhawk]

Not with that attitude, you can't, but I'm pretty sure it was a car door, regardless.

[Who the fuck let this child in here and... wait. No. This child was brought here into a pseudomilitary organization. Who would fucking dare--?!]

How the hell did you score a hover bike anyway?

[Text]

[sleight_of_hand]

* Gut you like a fish

fixed it for you

Re: [Text]

[redwarhawk]

ducking autocorrect

[Text]

[sleight_of_hand]

(*≧▽≦)ﾉｼ))

you can turn that off you know

Re: [Text]

[redwarhawk]

That's quitter talk.

text; un: TK-622

[loyal_soldier]

[This isn't what he normally sees when he logs on to check his messages. But if this is the biggest thing that happens this week, he'll be grateful.]

You should report it to the local police. This is technically a hit-and-run on the part of the other driver, and it's illegal in this jurisdiction.

Re: text; un: TK-622

[redwarhawk]

So there's jurisdiction where it is legal then.

[loyal_soldier]

Maybe. I only have a limited familiarity with local law here. It's all regional, nothing planetary. Too much to keep track of.

[Even the stuff they called "international" usually wasn't signed onto by everyone. That just seemed like a recipe for trouble.]

[redwarhawk]

Huh. Well, that ought to make things easier.

[After all, there were whole planets where kneecapping someone was not only legal but expected business practice! There's probably places like that here, too!

Probably not going to crack the missing driver's knees with a prybar, that's overkill, but it's good information for future jobs. And a good threat.]

permavid b/c typing is HARD

[killtime]

[ Dryly: ]

Well, that's a shame.

Re: permavid b/c typing is HARD

[redwarhawk]

[[FUCK WRONG PERSON] Tho probably in character for later things]
[Where's the video function on this thing? HA THERE!]

[Equally dry, looking over the tops of her glasses.]: Yes, that would be why I am screaming into the void of this fuckforsaken holonet or whatever it's called.

[killtime]

[ LMFAO THAT'S OKAY because honestly, Andy is more or less attached to that man by the hip, though the only thing keeping her company right now is a dwindling cigarette, which she smokes rather placidly. ]

Feel better yet?

[redwarhawk]

[She snorts and smiles crookedly, getting the impression she's being made fun of for her temper tantrum, as she well she should be, but on the other hand...]

My bike still has a dent in it, and I still don't have an ass to kick, but it could be worse.

[This one has an attitude and manner she recognizes, the lazy calm of a predator at rest. Another soldier of some kind, given that she looks fit as all hell despite the slightly flat killer's eyes.]

[Text]

[prophesiedone]

Maybe you should pick a better establishment?

Re: [Text]

[redwarhawk]

Fuck that, this womptrap has the best hot wings I've found anywhere but fuckin Mandalore.

[Text]

[prophesiedone]

[He has the best luck.]

Don't tell me you're a Mandalorian?

text;

[mycrosstobear]

Shame. It's a nice bike.

Re: text;

[redwarhawk]

[She snorts at the screen, muttering "If you say so, bur'cya" to herself.]

It's uglier than a Hosnian hangover and sounds like a congested vractyl, but it's big, fast, and easy to maintain. It's kinda growing on me.

[[That said, originally she was going to have a garbage name-brand junker but I am absolutely down for it turning out to be the government issued envy of the Hell's Angels if you are :D Aesthetic(TM) is important for a hero, after all, and she very well just have no idea what makes an awesome motorcycle when she's used to speeders and jetpacks.]]

text;

[mycrosstobear]

Sounds like it's got the most important stuff covered, then.

Hope you can find the asshole who did that.

[[Wolfwood's priority in a bike is mostly "how much can I put it through without it losing the power I want," so feel free to assume anything beyond that!]]

text;

[storyseeker]

Kind of an extreme reaction, don't you think?
Not that I can't relate to the feeling.

Re: text;

[redwarhawk]

Yeah, but it's the kinda reaction I only need to have once, y'know?

text;

[storyseeker]

Alas, there are many asshole parkers out there. Especially in Heropa. It's a Florida thing.