★ 001 | Video

[unbreaker]

[When the broadcast begins, the young man onscreen (sporting a perfect pompadour with not a single strand of hair out of place) tucks away a comb and reclines upon the front step of one of the government houses, presumably the one he's been assigned. He seems to consider for half a second more what he's going to say, one eyebrow cocking upwards, a strong indication that there's a question brewing, while his lips pucker in a vague showing of frustration.]

Alright...

[Here we go.]

So, I'm digging all the free stuff that people seem to wanna hand out in exchange for photographs with us and whatever, and the hoverboards are really, really awesome. That said, I might actually like these new phones even better, though? They're pretty great! Slim, stylish, lightweight...pocket size. Anyway, all that's nice, but something's been bothering me and I've gotta ask...

What the actual fuck is up with these glow-in-the-dark tattoos?

[His jaw sets stubbornly, blue eyes fixating on something that lies out of view of the camera. Probably the tattoo in question.]

I mean I know what they're for, or what we're being told they're for, but like...

Shit, is this even legal?

[Actually, he's a hell of a lot more concerned with the fact that he wasn't even asked if something could be done to his body, especially as he can't fix it. Talk about invasive. Makes a guy wonder what else was done without his knowing.]

And on that note...I'm kind of curious about this whole registration deal! Anyone got a solid argument for it or against it? 'Cause right now I'm right in the middle and uh...from what I hear, that means my roommates can put me out?

What kind of asshole would do that, though?

Anyway, that's it. That's all I gotta say!

[He reaches forward as if to turn the device off but stops.]

Oh, and the name's Josuke! [Best to get it out now so he's not repeating it a hundred times later.] Josuke Higashikata!

[Click!]

Comments

totally video

[seesthestars]

[well she COULD be helpful and answer his questions about registration (seems sketchy) and give her opinion on tattoos (way sketchy, but the part where it glows is objectively cool) and the like, but instead she's just gonna stare at the screen...]

Jo...!

[and then yell really loud, ready]

Josuke!! No way! Holy crap, you're the last person I expected to see here!

video

[unbreaker]

[Why are you yelling! Quit that, Jolyne!]

Not so loud, not so loud...! What the hell?

[He rubs at one ear with the palm of his hand while studying the face on the display screen of his phone. Whoever this girl is, she seems to know him. Josuke can't seem to place her face, though. It's not unfamiliar, but he's definitely never met this girl before, so how does she...?]

What d'ya mean the last person!

video BRB MAKING SHIT UP

[seesthestars]

[fuck you, she's excited!]

What do you mean?! I haven't seen you in ages! It's been-

[A really long time, actually. Years even. and she was much younger, and he... well... he might have been a little older, now that she really looks.]

[Now the excitement is giving way to a vague desperation, and she points to herself.]

C'mon, you remember, right? It's me. Jolyne.

video

[unbreaker]

[Ages?

TMW you're trying not to make one of those stupid faces people make when someone they don't recognize comes up to them all OMG HI HOW ARE YOU IT'S BEEN SO LONG and you've got no fucking clue who they are but you don't wanna be rude so you're like OMG YEAH IT'S YOU I'M GREAT YEAH HOW'S THE THING...? YOU KNOW...THE ONE I MEAN.......

And it's obviously not going over well because you're as transparent as wet tissue paper.]

...Jolyne?

[Until that name drops.]

Jolyne!

[HEY IT'S JOLYNE! It's Jotaro's DAUGHTER Jolyne! ...wow she's kind of adorable, Jolyne. Jolyne who's given his dad a hard time and is his GREAT NIECE oh shit this is kind of fucking awesome.

Josuke doesn't KNOW her, at least he doesn't think he does, but he knows ABOUT her! He can do this, he's played this game with Joseph already.]

Hey! How are you?

video

[seesthestars]

[So unsure about that response right now. It's what she wants to hear, sure, but... everything else...]

Yeah, I'd look kinda different by now, wouldn't I? After all this time, I mean... but you haven't changed at all.

[Well that's. A little true. But hey, two can play at this game.]

It's gotta be more of this time anomaly stuff, right? Isn't that crazy? You see someone you know here and they're way older or younger than you expect them to be! But you know, that doesn't mean we can't hang out again, and catch up. Talk about all those fun times we had together!

Speaking of which, how's your girlfriend?

video

[unbreaker]

Yeah! You're... [She'd be taller than when he saw her last, right? If he'd seen her at all. Which he hasn't. So not great. Stupid foot in mouth syndrome.] You're, you know! Bigger!

[Wait. ASDDFdfgfDFGdsdsadfksDJGSH]

I MEAN NOT BIG AS IN FAT OR ANYTHING BUT LIKE, NOT SHORT! TALL! TALLER THAN I REMEMBER! YOU'VE GOT MORE HAIR!

[He gestures with his hands in the air, but drops them back into his lap a second later. Better that than dragging them down his face and groaning, because oh my god this is painful.

Laughing. AHAHA. HAHAHA. HAH. Look at him, he's innocent here. So believable.]

This time thing's a bitch, huh? [AIN'T THAT THE TRUTH. BUT...he's got this. He can use that.] It'll make bouncing stories back and forth a bit hard, but...I can try! I'd love to hear about...

[Sorry. What did she just say? HE HAS A WHAT...?!]

I DON'T--! I MEAN SHE'S--! WHY'RE YOU--!? WHAT??

video

[seesthestars]

[....yeah okay that definitely confirms it. How could you do this to her, Josuke. How. As if she didn't have enough disappointing men in her life.]

[Time to lay it on thick.]

Yeah, totally! I mean I only met her once, but she was sooo sweet. I remember now, she was talking about you guys getting married and honeymooning in Indonesia or something. You know, where they have those big komodo dragons?

I guess it's kinda late to admit this, but I was really jealous when she said that. I wanted you to take me there instead. Hey, do you think we could still go...?

video | the real reason josuke doesn't register: to avoid taking jolyne to indonesia

[unbreaker]

Bull...bullshit.

[No girlfriend turned sudden fiancee would ever ask him to honeymoon where there are giant freaking reptiles everywhere, and he sure as shit wouldn't propose the idea himself.

HE'S CALLING YOUR BULLSHIT, JOLYNE!

Which means...

Aw, crap.]

You know, don't you? [STUPID question. Stupid!] Just to be clear...it's not like I don't roughly know who you are?

I WASN'T LYING!

video | take her to the zoo as a compromise, josuke

[seesthestars]

[Behold how unconcerned she is that he called her bluff. Mostly because she's clearly unhappy about having to call his. All the fake cheerfulness has officially evaporated.]

Good, 'cause you're a shitty liar. You know, you can just tell me if you don't remember me instead of trying to get my hopes up. I'm not an idiot. It was a long time ago anyway. I just thought...

[...no, no. not doing this. She takes a deep breath, and says a little more softly-]

If you were anyone else, I'd be tempted to break your nose for that.

[...]

So. Who am I? Since you roughly know.

video | takes her to the butterfly habitat

[unbreaker]

I wasn't...I mean, you already sounded hopeful to start with, you know?

[And he felt bad having to be the one to put a damper on that. Which is a really lame excuse. LAME. And he knows it, but it's also the truth.]

Look, I'm sorry. If I'm being honest, I don't really know you. I've heard about you from a couple people, but only after arriving here.

[He sighs, cheeks puffing outwards briefly.]

I know you're Jotaro's daughter and...my great niece.

video | yes! and the reptile house

[seesthestars]

Yeah, well, I should've known better. I'll live even if you've never heard of me before now. It's not the first time someone didn't recognize me here, either.

[At least he was up front about it... though it's hard to say if that's better actually. It brings up some complicated feelings so she's JUST GOING TO IGNORE IT FOR NOW and focus on what he's saying.]

[And then, after a moment...]

...Uncle Josuke.

Yeah, that was it. You know, I think I was too young to really think about what that meant. It's just what I called you. I didn't know our family was so...

[...]

What was that? Did you say great niece?

video | ...no he's afraid he'll have a harry potter moment and the snake will get him

[unbreaker]

[Aw shit. Josuke just nods and rubs at the back of his neck awkwardly.

Here it comes.]

Yeah, uh...it's exactly what it sounds like.

[What else can he say? Trying to beat around the question and change the subject will just piss her off more, and to be honest, he really doesn't wanna have a pissed off niece.]

video | he'll never be able to defeat voldemort with that attitude

[seesthestars]

[She's doing some mental calculations, working off what she knows now and remembers from before. You can watch it happen! Then comes the confusion, the annoyance...]

That doesn't make any sense.

[It sounds rather accusing towards Josuke, but it's not really. It's more of a who fucked up here, and she wants to confirm the answer.]

video | he doesn't wanna you do it jolyne you have the reptile exp

[unbreaker]

It makes perfect sense if you're willing to draw the lines.

[Look, he doesn't think anybody is proud of how it came to be, but it is what it is and he's not sorry he was born, so he just spits it out.]

Joseph's my old man.

video | god it's just a malevolent snake wizard don't be such a baby

[seesthestars]

[She's really on the verge of saying but you're Japanese, but doesn't because that's stupid. Of course he knows he's Japanese. And of course she knows what he's saying, but it's just left of what she remembers, herself.]

What the hell... nobody ever mentioned that part! I mean, sure, I was like eight, so maybe it wasn't important. But that's still so annoying! Dammit.

[She appears to kick something near her foot, offscreen, displaying how much she's matured since then.]

...Sorry, I guess that one isn't really your fault. I just didn't realize, this whole time...

video | nope, extreme levels of CAN'T EVEN with that

[unbreaker]

You were young. [He shrugs.] Nobody told you, just like I didn't know anything until a bit before I got here.

[Of course, in his old man's defense (although it's not a strong defense) even Joseph didn't know anything until it'd come time to start planning inheritances. Josuke's gotten used to the idea of it by now, but it's still not comfortable having to recall when it means having to fill other people in on the matter and watching them get all disappointed and irate. Actually...he's starting to feel a bit bad for his old man because of it, even if Joseph brought (or will bring) it upon himself.]

For what it's worth...it really is nice meeting you.

video | jeez she has to do everything around here

[seesthestars]

Hey, hey, c'mon. Don't say it like that, it feels weird when I've already met you. Just say, "hey Jolyne! Good to see you!" I won't even be mad this time.

[Since she already schooled him and everything. Besides... it's hard to stay mad at him. Look at him.]

Well, I guess it'll be weird no matter what. But it's good to see you, too. ...did you really not know about it, either?

[standsproud]

...that was pretty clever.

[seesthestars]

[all the cool points she may have accumulated during that bluff are now evaporating in past-dad's presence]

Ah! ...thanks.

He does make it pretty easy, though. Like I said, he sucks at lying.

[standsproud]

Yeah. Must run in the family.

[seesthestars]

Does it really?

[...not sure if that's good or bad actually...]

Hey... you didn't know about Josuke either, right? He'd be too young for that.

[standsproud]

The old man's no good at it, either.

[He shakes his head.] Never met the kid. He'd be older than you, right?

[seesthestars]

Don't tell me he tries to pull that crap too. I can't believe him.

[god, joseph you suck today]

Anyway, you're right. I think he was about 17 or so when I met him, and that was when I was still a kid, so... ...wait. Shit, that means he's younger than me now, too! What the hell?

[standsproud]

A guy like that, it's easy to tell what he's thinking.

This place doesn't give a shit about how time's supposed to go. Better get used to it.

[seesthestars]

...Thanks.

[such curt advice! but what was she expecting really]

[sigh]

No, you're right. It's still weird, though. It makes me feel like I'm old. It's not a bad payoff for getting to see everyone, though.