1st Trick - Video

[vengefulshades]

[Here we have an exceedingly dapper individual-- a slick-looking fellow in a snappy red suit, sunglasses, and ridiculously tall blond hair. He is fiddling around with his communicator, testing out the buttons and functions, though he seems to already have the hang of it. He smirks as he notices the video function working, and addresses whatever masses are out there.]

At first I thought this might be the afterlife. But no such luck, am I right? Right.

Then I thought it might be Purgatory. Somewhere to work off one's sins, you know? But then there was suddenly an agent of the government offering me paperwork and asking if I wanted to work for them.

So it's definitely Hell.

[His voice is light, with the merest hint of amusement in it.]

So now I'm guessing this is more like a party. A real exclusive party that you've got to be lucky to get invited to. And if there's one thing that I am, it's lucky.

[He pushes his sunglasses up further onto his face.]

Were they lying, though? About having a job and a house if I put in the hours? That's the only important part to me.

And I don't trust any G-man to give me a straight answer, either.

Comments

[foreshadower]

And I'm very good with flowers.

However... [ He shrugged.

Obviously he wasn't all that invested, at least not so much that he'd just keep trying to figure that out. At least not by asking him. He was something of a gentleman, after all. ]

I'm certain being good with computers is a bit more useful these days, yes?

[vengefulshades]

It's a living. I don't know how useful it will be for heroics, but that's not really my scene, I don't think.

[foreshadower]

Well, is it for most of us? Hardly.

I find there's very little that's good for heroics.

[vengefulshades]

I guess not.

It's all about the little heroes, though, isn't it? The guy bagging groceries, or the lady who makes your coffee, or your friendly neighborhood sys admin.

[foreshadower]

For some, yes, I suppose it is.

I don't get mired in little niceties like that. I'm only interested in the larger than life.

[vengefulshades]

Sorry to burst your bubble then, buddy. I'm definitely ordinary.

[That's what he'll tell himself as long as he's here, for as long as he can.]

Just your average everyday computer programmer. That's me.

[foreshadower]

Well, not anymore, whether you like it or not. Now you're beyond ordinary, you're an import.

[vengefulshades]

The most ordinary import there ever was.

[Definitely not a walking corpse with horrific cosmic powers. Nope.]

[foreshadower]

I have not met an ordinary import as of yet.

Now, I'm not unwilling to be proven wrong, but -- [ He leans forward, something of a smile on his face. ]

I rarely am.

[vengefulshades]

[Officially creeping him out now.]

I suppose nobody's really ordinary.

[foreshadower]

Very few, yes.

[ He leaned back. Don't worry, he's too lazy to be creepy, he just likes talking. Bored immortals, and all that. ]

Besides, there's always a story in there, somewhere. That's what interests me. Even if it's just your world.

[vengefulshades]

My world?

[He just shrugs.]

It's not all that different from this place, really. Really kind of boring.

[foreshadower]

I find my world boring, and we have superheroes.

It's all about perspective, really. I'm mostly interested in what happens -- the differences between one and another. Good tales, if you will.

[vengefulshades]

Good tales?

Hm. Well... I guess there's always the story of the "Secret Rendezvous." It was big news back home.

[foreshadower]

Oh? Color me curious. What happened?

[vengefulshades]

There was a popular rock band giving a live special on TV. It was the broadcast event of the year, and most of the country was going to be at home watching the concert.

Right at the most exciting part of the show, they were going to sing their number one hit, "Secret Rendezvous." And that's when it happened.

[foreshadower]

That's when it happened?

[ He leaned forward. ]

Do tell. I can't imagine a band gaining the interest of everyone in the country, it's impressive.

[vengefulshades]

Well, they were a very popular band. Especially with teenage girls. The singer had that bad boy thing going for him.

Anyway, the singer went up to start singing "Secret Rendezvous"... but all the lyrics were wrong.

He was singing top-secret government secrets. Shady deals, bribes, cover-ups, all the dirtiest, nastiest secrets of the country's government.

[foreshadower]

Oh!

[ God, he's such an ass, he's literally reaching over to pull a teacup from offscreen.

He's seriously into this now. ]

I'm sure that didn't make them very popular with the government, did it? How did they get all of that information?

[vengefulshades]

That's just it. It was impossible.

[He cracks a smug little grin.]

It was very embarrassing for the government, of course. They arrested the singer, but he had no explanation for it at all. He had absolutely no way of knowing any of those things.

It's a complete mystery.

[foreshadower]

Was it? Curiouser and curiouser, then?

Imagine some nobody suddenly knowing all those secrets.

Perhaps he was told?

[vengefulshades]

He didn't know a thing about what happened afterwards. He couldn't even repeat any of the secrets he'd sang. And they investigated everyone he knew... there was really no way he could have known.

Isn't that a fun story?

[foreshadower]

It is.

There must be some explanation for it, shouldn't there? I can think of a few, of course, but that's only guesses.

Fascinating that odd mysteries happen like that, from time to time, in different worlds, isn't it?

[vengefulshades]

I do enjoy a good mystery.

Out of curiosity, what are your guesses?

[foreshadower]

It could be a few things, couldn't it?

Perhaps he's a sleeper agent, and when certain signals, or codes are produced, it awakens the locked part of his brain, just at the right moment, such as when on camera.

Or perhaps he's only a puppet for something greater. Gods, other beings, someone used him as a mouthpiece.

He could have not been human at all, or he may even be an astounding actor.