★ 008 | Text

[unbreaker]

[Josuke's first strictly text broadcast to the network. The occasion? Well, if he's honest, human hearts weren't meant for tug-of-wars and Josuke's is exhausted from the seemingly endless pull on his at the moment. Things are much simpler if people can't see or hear his distress.

Never mind that it might be identifiable to those who know already his texting patterns, which are markedly...different from what follows on screen a moment later. For one, he rarely uses caps, and for another, the number of abbreviations that would appear if he were feeling better would be too numerous to count.]

For those who're interested, PAINTBALL is still on for tomorrow. So pay attention if you wanna play! This is what you need to know.

1. You need to be in Maurtia Falls by 7 PM at a place called All Star Parking - it's an out-of-use parking garage near the east end of town that you can't miss.


2. The game is played solo, in pairs, or in teams - it's up to you. Just remember, there'll be only one winner by the end of it.


3. Hisoka (my partner) and I got some protective gear for you, but it's first come-first serve, so you might wanna bring your own padding if you don't wanna get a little banged up.


4. Powers are allowed, but anyone caught pulling lethal stunts is gonna need a ride straight to the emergency room when I'm finished with them...I guarantee that.


5. It's 1 round played until there's only 1 person left 'standing'. You're out if you get shot 3 times - which should still be a challenge 'cause of peoples' powers.


6. Sorry, there's no prize, just the glory - but that's all a real champ needs, right?

I guess that's about it. If you're a new face around these parts and you're feeling up to playing hard with the big boys, you're more than welcome to join in. Don't expect anybody to go easy on you, though.

[In any case, that's appears to be all he has to say today about...well, anything. There's nothing to signify he's been following the network posts (even though he has been) or that he cares what's going on (he does) and that he's bothered by certain events (an understatement). In sum, his post might as well read: IT'S PLAYTIME BITCHES, GET YOUR GAME FACE ON AND PREPARE TO LOSE! ...even if he feels a lot more like calling the whole thing off and calling up his biffle for a cheesy movie night.]

Comments

text;

[unbreaker]

[...]

Oh.

[Um.]

You didn't say "Your next line is..." though?

text;

[friendshiprocks]

I thought you knew how the routine went!

[unbreaker]

Hey, I can say the same for you!

[She's not your old man, Josuke...]

[friendshiprocks]

Let's do this again. I'll say my bit, then you reply 'why do you ask,' then I'll hit you with the punchline, okay?

[unbreaker]

Again?

Sure, alright!

[friendshiprocks]

[ aaaand then she puts that grin back on her face. ]

Hey Josuke, when we play paintball, you better be hungry!

[unbreaker]

But Hime! Why would you ask me that?!

[Isn't this such great acting?]

[friendshiprocks]

Because you're going to eat my dust!

[ a comedy team for the ages. ]

[unbreaker]

Damn! I walked right into that one!

[...]

But seriously, how do you know I don't got something special cooking for you?

[friendshiprocks]

I wouldn't know, Josuke! Do you have something special cooking for me?

[ she is hoping that he's got a fun comeback otherwise this comedy routine is gonna fall flat pretty fast ]

[unbreaker]

YEAH! I'm gonna make you EAT your own WORDS!

[friendshiprocks]

Ba dum tssssh!

[ yes, she just made a rimshot noise with her mouth ]

[unbreaker]

Seriously, though! If you're not out of the game too early, we should grab a bite to eat after! Wanna?

[friendshiprocks]

Yeah, definitely! Where d'you want to go—I'm up for pretty much anything!

[unbreaker]

Well, Chrollo's treating people to a free meal at his diner! So I'm inviting everyone there after the game. Wanna meet up there?

[friendshiprocks]

Yep!

Although...does his diner have ice cream?

[unbreaker]

you know! i'm not actually sure. i mean it probably does, what kind of place serves burgers without ice cream? not a good one! and chrollo seems like a guy with good taste, so i bet it has awesome ice cream.

[friendshiprocks]

If he doesn't, we should make him serve ice cream! File a customer complaint or something like that!

[unbreaker]

whoa whoa i don't think we need to go that far, chrollo's a pretty reasonable guy he'd probably just appreciate a friendly suggestion!

[friendshiprocks]

[ you underestimate just how much she wants ice cream. ]

I'm taking your word on this—I don't think I've ever met the guy.