004; audio

[bestever]

Fucking-- Fuck! The goddam closet? What does a guy have to do to get a little respect around here?

[a few seconds of wordless, irritable grunting.] Okay, fine. Fine!

Either there's something really wrong with my internal clock, or somebody has some fucking explaining to do. Mostly about what the hell happened while I was pulled. [wait, right. that might not have context.] Deactivated. Uninstalled. Whatever!

[the next pause is short, there's a quiet shuffle and a slightly louder grunt that mean that he's crossing his arms and huffing irritably. in other words, the default church response to anything.]

I'm waiting, Private Tucker.

Comments

video

[glitterateur]

[Thinking. Thinkiiiing.]

.....Tucker put you in a closet?

video;

[ursawhiner]

At least it's better than a laser face?

permavoice;

[bestever]

No, Wash put me in a closet. Tucker just put me back, I guess. The jerk.

permavoice;

[bestever]

... I'm sorry, what part of laser face sounds like a drawback to you?

permavoice;

[worstever]

Wait, Tucker did what?

[ursawhiner]

The part where you're only a face!

[bestever]

Did you miss the part with the laser that comes out of my eye??

[ursawhiner]

I have a laser and it's not that cool!

same;

[bestever]

Oh, sure! Play dumb! Like this wasn't your fucking idea!

[worstever]

When did you get another laser?!

[worstever]

What? You lost me.

[bestever]

Another!?

[worstever]

I only knew about one shaped like a camera!

permavoice

[bestsword]

[Christ, he figured Epsilon would eventually come back, and somewhere in the back of his mind he knew he'd be blamed but.

Yeah he wasn't ready.]

I didn't do anything!

[bestever]

Right, 'cause I just shorted out all on my own, or something. God, you two are both such pieces of shit, you know that?

[worstever]

What possible reason would Tucker and I have had to coordinate pulling you?

[bestever]

I don't know! You tell me, mister 'here's some free food for totally no reason, but Epsilon has to sit at the little kids' table while we eat it'! [the Slowly Mounting Shrillness is strong tonight.]

ayep;

[bestever]

Oh, tell it to the judge, jerkoff!

[bestsword]

Why would I have done that in the middle of a paintball fight?! We got our asses kicked!

[ursawhiner]

I... kind of also have a forehead laser?

[bestever]

I don't know! Because you're a stubborn prick who can't accept help? 'Cause that'd make you real original around here. [it's that flavor of Church Angry where he's just hissing and spitting and getting in the hits that he can. sorry, tuck.]

[bestever]

If you think it's not that cool, it can't be that good of a laser. Sorry, Dip. Them's just the facts. I didn't decide how lasers work.

[worstever]

It was personal. You didn't need to hear it.

[ursawhiner]

I still think eating and having hands is better than being able to fire a laser.

[bestsword]

[Wow wow His Best Friend 2.0, everybody.] Christ, look, I didn't do anything, you just disappeared, it's been weeks!