Dexter Grif (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
snackcakes) wrote in ![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png)
maskormenace2015-10-25 09:58 pm
snackcakes) wrote in maskormenace2015-10-25 09:58 pm
Entry tags:
- marceline abadeer | the vampire queen,
- † agent texas | n/a,
- † agent washington | recovery one,
- † cisco ramon | vibe,
- † dexter grif | n/a,
- † dipper pines | n/a,
- † kaito kuroba | kaitou kid,
- † klarion bleak | n/a,
- † maya fey | the pink princess,
- † michael j caboose | blue guy,
- † peter pan | n/a,
- † princess bubblegum | n/a,
- † ripley | n/a,
- † stan pines | n/a,
- † tucker | ladies man
PSA; video
[a video starts of two dumbasses in colorful space armor standing around in downtown de chima]
Hey, everybody. This is Captain Dexter Grif of the popular webseries Red vs. Blue.
And this is Captain Dick Simmons, from the same show, and your local family counselor.
It's almost Halloween, and we here at Red Base want to remind all of you to be safe out there around one of today's most deadly substances.
Candy: the silent killer.
Every year, hundreds of children across the U.S. die in horrible candy related accidents.
Why, when I was a child, I remember my neighbor, little Jimmy Saunders. There he was, with a Bling-Sucker, riding his skateboard. Then, well... I can't even talk about it over the network like this. Poor Jimmy. It's just...too horrible.
If you're a parent, you might be asking yourself what you can do to make sure your kid doesn't end up horrifically maimed or dead or whatever like Jimmy. Well, that's easy.
[pan out to a beautiful cardboard box with a handy opening cut into the side. note the helpful labelling of "candy here" with an arrow pointing up drawn onto the side]
We've gone ahead to do you the favor of collecting the world's resident candy expert and certified candy tester to ensure that the candy you are preparing to give to your children is safe, tasty, and not full of harmful substances, like space-germs or horse meat. So, as this holiday comes around, pre-emptively, empty your bags full of that.. suspicious sugar-monstrosity collection into our convenient treat receptacles, and in 3-5 business days, we'll guarantee a return of the safe and healthy candy you and your children deserve.
Our current locations can be found around De Chima, but we hope to expand to all major cities soon. Be sure to contact us about what you can do to help us expand so that your kids can still have the same trick-or-treat experience they've grown up with, just without the constant worry that that weird old lady down the road laced their chocolate in rat poison or worse.
We appreciate your outreach in making this holiday safe for everyone! Have a good night!
[...there's a brief pause while Simmons goes to cut off the video feed
muffled:]
You so owe me for this, Grif. So much.
[OOC Note: orange is Grif, maroon is Simmons. sorry not sorry.]
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