video; backdated to 10/28

[you_tried]

[ Squint your eyes a little everyone, when the feed opens the camera catches the direct glare of the hot sun. Whoever is holding the communicator has it positioned at an odd angle, so the video captures clear blue skies, though the sound of the ocean can be heard with the occasional tropical bird cawing somewhere in the distance. The camera jolts without warning, dipping low enough to capture what appears to be a boat deck.

Off camera, Karen’s voice can be heard snappishly saying: ]

Are you still trying to take a selfie? Could you put that down for one second?

[ The camera jerks again, capturing an image of a chest that might be familiar to those of you who own the Booster Gold Mancalendar™ (you’re welcome). ]

Is it sooo wrong that I want to document this?

I guess we can document the part where I throw you off the boat.

You wouldn’t. There’s jellyfish in there! Probably. And besides, you never said there was a rule against selfies. It’s an American tradition.

Just try me, and Jesus, would you focus on steering the boat? [ Something splashes up beside the boat, seizing Karen’s attention for a moment. She groans loudly. ] We’re getting too close to those things.

Those things are Hawaiian squeaking sharks, and they’re our friends. Say cheese, guys!

[ The camera’s focus wobbles down off the side of the boat, zooming in on a group of splashing, smiling bottlenose dolphins, which are indeed getting very close. And then: a thump. ]

... oh, God. What was that?

Uh… maybe start guessing what it wasn’t and we’ll narrow it down…

[ The clicks and whistles of dolphins grow louder. If you happen to speak dolphin (or even if you don’t), they sound… pretty pissed. ]

MICHAEL.

WHAT? It was an accident!

[ The camera jerks again, horror movie shaky-cam style, as more dorsal fins rise from the water. Did you know dolphin pods can get really, really huge? Well, now you do. ]

Crap. Does anyone know how to say sorry in dolphin?


( ooc: red is karen and blue is booster! replies from karen will have the ID read as “karen starr”. booster's reads “booster gold,” but who cares. no dolphins were harmed in the making of this post. )

Comments

video;

[brushoff]

[ see, this is why he really likes Booster. Booster's kind of an endearing dumbass. ]

Did all the dolphins make it out unscathed?

[you_tried]

Uh, probably? Yes. Are dolphins endangered? I'm going to go with yes. Final answer.

[brushoff]

Why are you asking me, I'm not the science guy! [ said with a small laugh. ]

video

[boobwindow]

[ A few minutes later, the feed mostly focused on Karen's face: ]

Yes, they're fine. Don't listen to him.

[ Oh god, maybe one of them isn't fine. ]

video

[brushoff]

[ Dorian has a talent for assuming the worse: he thinks that is a HELLA DEAD DOLPHIN. ]

You sure? I don't understand dolphin noises but I'm very adept at telling when things are angry.

Video

[liverletdie]

Looks like you guys could use an actual driver.

[you_tried]

I am an actual driver!

[ this is a lie, he's never had a driver's license in his life ]

Just— not a boat driver. Pilot? Captain.

[liverletdie]

Third time's a charm, right?

So you're not really a boat driver and you're driving through what...waters with dolphins? Isn't that a crime somewhere?

I'd hate to be you.

[boobwindow]

Ugh, probably.

[liverletdie]

Well, too bad you're all the way in the ocean or I'd offer my help.

I mean, unless you want tons of metal on the deck.

[ Like he couldn't take it off but you know... ]

action for booster

[boobwindow]

[ Her hand reaches out to grab him by the neck and shake him roughly. ]

Why does everything with you always result in something stupid happening?!

[you_tried]

[ NO, HIS BEAUTIFUL NECK ]

Ow! I don't know! Why are you blaming me and not the dolphins?

[boobwindow]

[ WRINGS IT HARDER. ]

I told you a million times to focus on steering!

[ Which he probably can't do if she's squeezing the life out of him. ]

video.

[glowsferatu]

They aren't sharks until they're trying to eat someone, that's the defining characteristic of sharks.

It doesn't look like they'd be able to fit a person in those mouths.

[you_tried]

They can fit pieces of a person! That's enough!

[glowsferatu]

Then just stay out of the water! [ She frowns, eyes narrowing as something occurs to her. ] You know, it's a funny life you've led when it's actually novel to think of a shark being in the water.

[boobwindow]

Honestly, sometimes things go in one ear and out the other with him.

[glowsferatu]

And it looks like it's got you in the middle of a traffic crime. Should I give your lawyer a call, do you think the dolphins will press charges?

[ It's delivered very seriously, unclear whether or not she's joking. ]

Video

[khajidont]

Wow.

[Is he impressed by Booster's vanity? That they crashed into a dolphin? That they're on a vacation together at all?]

I've never heard anyone call him Michael before! You guys having fun? Or, uh... were you?

[you_tried]

No one calls me Michael when they're not lecturing me!

[khajidont]

I'm kinda shocked that I haven't heard anyone lecture you in public 'til now. Should I start calling you Michael when I'm not happy with you, then?

[boobwindow]

Well, it hasn't been a complete disaster.

voice;

[hsalf]

Oh, so this is the date you told me about Ms. Starr? Seems to be going swimmingly.

[Was that pun intentional?? It's a mystery.]

[you_tried]

Wait, she did what now?

[boobwindow]

[ Oh my god. ]

It's not a date.