[ video ]

[hostage]

[Goodbye to the Jesse who was a clean and successful art student, hello again to the Jesse who looks like he spent the last three nights sleeping under a bridge.]

Been thinking about this the past couple days, trying to figure out how I really feel about it, but you know what? I still feel the same as I did before:

It was shitty.

It was shitty for you guys to change us back without asking if that's what we wanted. A lot of us were better off the way we were last week. The next time something like that happens, maybe ask how we fucking feel about it.

[He just had to get that off his chest.]

Comments

[hostage]

Maybe if somebody erased everything in my brain. But even that don't fix everything I did before.

[rathercommon]

[ Her face turns more sympathetic, sadder. She speaks quietly. ]

It's a wretched thing. And you've had a wretched go of it. All your life, a wretched go. You were used by someone wicked, and it's made things worse.

But that's shaped you into someone with a sense of responsibility, hasn't it. The other you might have been happier - yeah. But do you think he'd be as devoted to making the world around him better?

[hostage]

Everything that happened to me didn't make me better. It made me worse. It made me sick. I know what you're trying to say. Everybody likes to talk about how things happen for a reason and what doesn't kill you makes you stronger and all that shit. But it's bullshit. I've hurt people in ways he never woulda. All he does is make the world better. Nobody is ever gonna be able to say that about me.

[rathercommon]

You don't hurt people here.

[hostage]

Tell that to Carl Grimes.

[Among... so many others. Yes, god, of course he hurts people here.]

[rathercommon]

Erm - [ She frowns, a little puzzled. ] That...angry child? What about him?

[hostage]

[Oh, has she somehow missed Carl talking about this at every possible opportunity?]

I killed his dad.

[rathercommon]

Oh. Erm - why...? And his dad came back, right?

[hostage]

I brought him back, but that's not - that's not the point, alright? You're just wrong. You're wrong about me.

[rathercommon]

All right. So if you're so bad...how are you changing yourself?

[hostage]

I'm only killing people like once every three months now, so that's good.

[...Sarcasm?]

[rathercommon]

[ Uhhhh... ]

Right. And what are you doing to get that down to one every six months?

[hostage]

[On the bright side, that makes him laugh?]

[rathercommon]

I mean it!

[hostage]

[Still giggling over that, thanks.]

Ah, man. I... I mean, it's too bad a lobotomy wouldn't work on me, right? I dunno.

[rathercommon]

Okay, and how about a solution that's not horrid?

[hostage]

[He gives a helpless shrug. Honestly, there's a reason most people come to the conclusion that they have to kill him.]

[rathercommon]

[ She stares and stares. ]

Well?

[hostage]

I got nothing.

[rathercommon]

[ She wrinkles her nose. ]

Well, then that's what you should focus on. Not being a different person. Being a better person.

[hostage]

I'm just not sure I can do the second thing without the first thing.

[rathercommon]

Yes you can.

[hostage]

Okay.

[rathercommon]

Okay. So what's the plan?

[hostage]

I still don't got one.