text

[aggressiveapathy]

hello network
i'm looking for someone with magical matchmaking powers
it happens every year
someone makes other people fall in love/hate/bromance
so
get in touch with me
we'll make it better this time around
don't leave these things to fate
she's a jerk
valentines is cliche
sorry not sorry CM

hit me up

Comments

[brushoff]

Look at your life, April. It's definitely better away from Will.

[ rhymes with schmannable schmecter ]

[aggressiveapathy]

Mm. We're all untrustworthy. Should give it to a boyscout or something.

[brushoff]

Or how about you give it back to me. There we go, easiest solution.

[aggressiveapathy]

Can't you just throw wine in Will's face like an adult?

[brushoff]

I've already tried and failed to convince him to hand it over. That's why I'm talking to you.

[aggressiveapathy]

Try meaning...?

[brushoff]

I asked him very nicely?

[ He whined. a lot. ]

[aggressiveapathy]

We like cake. And wine. And interpretive dances.

[brushoff]

Two out of three can happen by this evening.

[ who is not above bribery, DORIAN IS NOT ABOVE BRIBERY. ]

[aggressiveapathy]

We'll have a dinner party. Plead your case before a jury of your furry peers.

[brushoff]

What do raccoons eat? I need to know what to properly bribe them with as well.

[aggressiveapathy]

Try the internet. I'm not going to bias the jerks.

[brushoff]

I'll go with pizza. Pizza's always a good option.