video;

[wizzardly]

Right, so it's been brought to my attention that those bloody awful reports have been floating certain rumors around about me, and I'd rather just end those before they even get going all right?

[because even Rincewind's starved sense of self-respect has to draw the line at people thinking he fancies dishware.]

So, to be clear: I'm pansexual.

[which is an admittedly backwards linguistic for declaring one's lack of attraction to tea cups and related sundry, but there's just no accounting for etymological taste.]

There? [he arches a pointed brow.] Shall I assume that just about does it? All questions answered? Jolly good.

[honestly, the people in this place really will believe anything, won't they? Lucky that Snart fellow pointed this out when he did - things really could have gotten out of hand.]

Comments

[brushoff]

Queer's the best way to describe me. All the terms I'd use to describe my preferences are a tad outdated.

[ the perils of discovering your sexuality in your 1880s. ]

And we are a varied group but I don't think as many of us are as pansexual as you think.

[wizzardly]

No, yes, you're very queer. [which does not mean to Rincewind what it does to Dorian.

He makes a face at that.]

Oh, don't tell me that. Now I'm going to be wondering who I can't have in the kitchen.

[brushoff]

[ Well since they're obviously talking about fucking, "who I can't have in the kitchen" = "who I can't sex up against the stove." ]

I don't think you'd want to have someone in the kitchen in the first place! The only place you could really make your move is the kitchen table. It's got novelty, but the novelty wears down in the end. I'd try the bathroom instead.

[wizzardly]

Dear gods, remind me to never use your bathroom.

...Or touch any surface in your house, for that matter.

[brushoff]

I sanitize everything! Blood occasionally happens when Toby and I...ah, get frisky, of course everything gets cleaned!

[ but yeah, sex happened everywhere in their apartment. ]

[wizzardly]

[Rincewind looks positively queasy.]

Right, you are no longer allowed to use that word; I'm revoking your "frisky" privileges.

[brushoff]

Would you prefer I use 'fucking' instead?

[ because he's got a feeling that Rincewind won't really prefer it either... ]

[wizzardly]

I'd really rather talk about something else. Anything else.

[brushoff]

You're the one who brought it up with the pansexual talk to begin with.