o2 | VIDEO | IT'S WRASSLE TIME

[burlyboy]

[ Hello, imPorts! Hope you're ready for something as obnoxious and loud as it gets, because that's Magnus to a tee, and this time, his appearances matches. He's dressed in an outfit that includes an extremely well crafted bear mask, and a poorly crafted everything else - it's tight, there's a cape and claws involved, and everything is decidedly furry. If Magnus is self-conscious about this, it doesn't show on what you can still see of his face. ]

Hey, fellas! This seems like the place to advertise, so here we go - I'm officially announcing my breakthrough into the wrestling scene! We got matches goin' on every Friday night this month in Maurtia Falls - [ it's a publicity stunt, and Magnus is there mainly to fail, which he signed up for ] - and I'd be real happy if some of you came out to see my debut as I'morko enters the ring!

[ He does a bear claw gesture and a low growling sound, because godsdammit, you stick to a theme. He flexes while he does it, which works surprisingly well. He then picks up a gaudy flyer that reads:

I'MORKO VS. THE SKULLCRUSHER
CARNIVORE CRASH
JUNE 2ND


It's gonna be a great time, so everyone should come on down. Tickets are cheap, and who doesn't want to see some guys beat the shit out of each other for an hour? Oh, and thanks to Taako for the idea. I think this is gonna work out great!

[ He peels off his mask, leaving behind some foolish looking helmet hair and a wide smile. ]

Wrestling's not going to be paying all the bills for a while - [ he seems pretty confident in his ability to become a star wrestler, but then again, with his enthusiasm and commitment to a bit, he'll fit right in ] - so I got a secondary reason for advertising on here. You need any freelance carpentry or bodyguarding work done, you just call Magnus Burnsides. Or, like, any other work. I'm flexible.

I'morko out!

[ NOTE: linked art is from HERE. ]

Comments

[heliophilic]

[A long, dramatic sigh.]

Ain't that the truth. Never been fond of holding back.

[burlyboy]

Not when they deserve it! [ Magnus also has a somewhat inaccurate view of how these things work; Angus has been his authority, and he hasn't been quite forthcoming in the interests of getting Magnus and his fellows not to go murdering people. ]

That the same where you're from, or do you just do it anyway?

[heliophilic]

Oh, it's frowned upon, but like you, I only go after the people that deserve it. No one's going to mourn their loss.

The problem with doing it here is you leave a trail of scumbags in your wake, no matter how terrible they may have been, you're more likely to wind up sparking an incident between the citizens and imPorts.

[burlyboy]

Shouldn't they be happy if some serial killer's off the streets?

[heliophilic]

You'd be surprised how many people think serial killers deserve a "fair trial" like everyone else.

[burlyboy]

Yeah? How many of them get punished?

[heliophilic]

Whatever percentage you have in your head, lower it.

[burlyboy]

Yeahhhhh, somehow, I had a feeling. We wouldn't have to do shitall if people would just do their jobs.

[heliophilic]

I'm all for the idea of the justice system having a little leeway to protect the wrongfully accused, but that just ain't how the system works in reality. It's all about whoever can hire the best lawyer. That's not justice.

[burlyboy]

Yeah, I'm catching what you're throwing out there. Is that just America's justice system, or is it all over?

[heliophilic]

All over. Some are worse, some are more blatant about flaunting their corrupt system.

[burlyboy]

There have had to have been plenty of people trying to resist. Not the way you do it - you know, a real, full-fledged rebellion kind of deal.

[heliophilic]

They exist, but too many people just accept it and move on.

[burlyboy]

Hunh.

Bet it's because of guns.

[heliophilic]

More like complacency.

[burlyboy]

You think? Where I'm from, rebellions aren't all that uncommon. But when we go at the dudes with swords with - with scythes and rakes and shit, they're not killing us where we stand. We're on even ground. Pretty sure if we had rakes and they had guns, we'd all be dead. Might've not rebelled in the first place.

[heliophilic]

True, but you'd be surprised just how many people can get their hands on a gun in this day and age.

[burlyboy]

[ He laughs, though it's not a particularly happy sound. ]

Yeah, uh, not as reassuring as that should be!

[heliophilic]

[His smirk widens.]

I know.