Permavid

[governorkang]

[Kang is standing in a brightly lit, homey kitchen that is not designed like any in government housing. He is also having to be careful where he puts his head and wings, to avoid smacking into a few copper pots hanging from a rack above an island. Judging from the proportions of everything else, very few humans would have the same problem.]

This may sound like a strange request, but does anyone know of any shops in Heropa that sell deer meat out of season? If it weren't illegal, I'd hunt the damn things myself.

[A female voice pipes up in the background.]

Language!

[He looks to the side with a sheepish expression and apologizes before continuing:]

Or anywhere else. Price isn't an issue.

[There's a distant sound of shouting, and the same voice heaves a sigh before saying that she'll be right back. Before Kang can respond or even protest, a very young baby bundled in a pale yellow blanket is thrust into his arms.

His eyes widen, his wings snap out slightly, and he looks to the side again in sheer panic.]

What are you - wait - come back!

[The rest of him doesn't move an inch, treating the baby dwarfed in his arms as if it's made of very expensive, very breakable glass.

The fact that he's recording to the network, and that he needs to breathe, is momentarily forgotten as he looks down.

HALP.]

Comments

[governorkang]

[Oh. Right. Recording. And breathing.

The panicked look abates only slightly. He'll worry about the laughing later.]

Kenzi, I don't - how am I supposed to hold her without my claws getting too close?

[heartstings]

[She takes a bit to finally stop laughing.] Man, you gotta come back and see this later because your face. Dude, your face was hilarious.

[A pause.]

Oh, uh, just be careful? [Her shrug can practically be heard.] Babies are surprisingly durable as long as you don't, like, drop them on their head.

[governorkang]

I know my kind's are, but even human babies?

[heartstings]

Well, if you, like, scratch it it's gonna cry and maybe bleed a little. We don't have scales to protect us but we heal fast enough.

[governorkang]

[Now he looks offended.]

I'm not that ignorant about human babies.

[heartstings]

Tch, well I dunno how much you know about human babies?

But really, just be mindful of the claws and you should be good.

[governorkang]

What little I know is from wartime and stories from other humans.

[His expression is bit grim.]

[heartstings]

Oh.

Well, don't worry. There's plenty of humans that would have the same reaction to having a baby thrust into their arms. [She's one of them.]

[governorkang]

[The bundle in his arms starts fussing, making Kang start to panic again. He has no idea how to calm her.]

Be glad you're not here, or it'd be you in this situation. Not me.

[heartstings]

No, no I wouldn't. Taking care of a rapidly aging Valkyrie was bad enough.

[governorkang]

[He snorts, looking to the side almost desperately as the fussing gets worse and turns to wailing. He decides to go with his first instinct: talk to her quietly (slipping into Nerakese out of habit) and start up a comforting rumble in his chest as he holds her up against him.

It does work after several seconds, and he relaxes, unable to help a small wistful smile on his face.]

...maybe there aren't as many differences as I thought.

[heartstings]

[She lets out a soft laugh.] Told you.

[governorkang]

I won't be making any offers to babysit any time soon.

[Somehow, he's keeping that rumble going and talking at the same time.]

[heartstings]

Awe, but you're so good at it! [She's clearly amused by him and this baby.]

[governorkang]

My own, yes. There's still enough differences I'd rather not chance it.

[heartstings]

Just means you need practice right? Plus you're, like, super adorable right now.

[governorkang]

[He makes a face at that. Draconians are not adorable, dammit.]

[heartstings]

[She's just going to laugh because that just doesn't work when he's holding the baby.]