[video]

[majorlyugh]

[Major comes on screen, wearing a tank top. He flexes both arms, creating a sort of upside-down U-shape.] Yo, bro! Bro, do you even lift, bro?!

God, no, sorry, can you imagine if I really talked like that? Ugh. Anyway, now that I've got your attention, please hold all the rotten fruit you were getting ready to pummel me with (with good reason) to listen to my announcement!

I'm looking to open up a fitness center for all imPorts later this month. I'm still in the stages of setting it all up, but it'll eventually - hopefully - have all sorts of equipment for all kinds of abilities and powers. Like, treadmills that go to inhuman speeds for all you Speedy Gonzalezes out there. Oh geez, was that racist? Sorry. Uh. For all you .. uh ... Flashes out there? And there'll be crazy weights for all of you Hulks who wanna show off how much you can bench to all your buds. If you have other powers that could benefit from going to the gym to workout on the regs, just let me know what kind of accommodations you might need, and I'll see what I can do!

[He starts to turn the video off, but comes back at the last minute.] OH! Wait, duh. The reason I made this was also to ask if there are folks who might be interested in working at said fitness center! We'll need front desk staff, personal trainers (I was one in my last life, so I can totes help you if you want me to!), a maintenance crew, an accountant, and PR folks. If you're interested, hit me up here or using the strange faux-iPhone devices we all have. Thanks!

Comments

video;

[storyseeker]

Any chance you could offer a discount to the non-physically superpowered? Because mine aren't affected by exercise, but I could use a good place to work out.

[video]

[majorlyugh]

Oh, yeah, of course! Crap, I should've mentioned that! It isn't just for the physically super powered! It's for everyone! But it'll have accommodating machines for those who are.

And a discount would make sense, since you won't be needing the Pimp My Ride equipment.

[shadohdamn]

( Oh, man.

Shadow watches the announcement with quiet amusement, eyebrows raising slowly, and then considers for about thirty seconds before flicking the communicator on. Why the hell not, right? It's not like Wednesday's here. )

I used to work in a gym.

( Also in a past life. ) Did a little PT. Mostly taught boxing.

[majorlyugh]

You ... definitely look like a guy who worked in a gym. Or like, was the gym. [He laughs a little.] Oh, that's an awesome combo! If you're interested, I'd be super pumped (no pun intended - or was it?) to have you join the staff.

Video

[drivesadesk]

I don't know. I was kind of enjoying the first few seconds of the video.

[Jonathan has a huge grin across his face.]

But I could use a good place to work out.

[video]

[majorlyugh]

Good, cause otherwise I was gonna have to go into my whole, "ARE YOU NOT ENTERTAINED?" speech, and really, that's just overkill.

[He grins, lighting up.] Awesome! I mean, I can't verify for its being good or not good yet, since it isn't set up yet, but I'd really appreciate you keeping it in mind once it does open. And, if it lives up to your expectations, spreading the word!

[quickfingers]

Is there a money back guarantee if machinery doesn't hold up?

[majorlyugh]

i mean .. sure? i hadn't really thought about it.

if you or someone else uses the machine to failure, i'd hope to get your (or whoever's) input on how to make it better - maybe with a discount for being a consultant of sorts going forward? though i'd def be willing to give refunds for those totes unhappy with the facility.

video.

[glowsferatu]

I would offer accounting service, but I'm afraid my docket's already full keeping my own books. If you don't find anyone else, I might be able to give you occasional help. But I certainly would be able to help your gym as a patron!

I just have two questions: how strong will your punching bags be, and where will your gym be located?

[video]

[majorlyugh]

Ah! That's great, okay. I'll keep you in mind .... ? [He's leaving a blank space here for her name.] Even if you're too busy, I appreciate you offering, anyway.

I can make them as strong as needed. I'll probably have some average ones, for those less-Hulk-inclined, but if you've got suggestions of how strong to make some of them, I'm all ears! It'll be in Maurtia Falls. Makes the most sense, since that's where I'm living, anyway.

video;

[legionnaires]

Actually, it would be nice to get back into a training regiment again.

Does it pay well?

[video]

[majorlyugh]

Yeah! I could totes help you with figuring out a good regiment, if you want. Or any of the other trainers, if I end up hiring any/any show interest.

I'll have to see how well it does, but .. I'd hope for a good hourly wage, yeah. If it takes off, I'd love to be able to offer actual salaries and benefits and all, but I have to start small. I guess, at least initially, I can offer free memberships for staff - on top of some kind of hourly pay, that I'll have to figure out once I get equipment and see how much it costs to run the place.

video

[fehus]

[there was a lot to take in here, starting with that U and ending with all of it]

[Magnus chooses clearly the most important part of the post to comment on]

Since you talked about Speedy Gonzales, I'm sort of picturing a giant hamster wheel for the inhuman treadmill?

Also, Speedy's not racist, he's a hero and a friend to all.

[video]

[majorlyugh]

I was just thinking a regular treadmill with a really good motor and constant maintenance to ensure nothing blows up or overheats, but I like your idea better, honestly.

Ah, I mean, I always liked him as a kid, but .. you know. I'm not Mexican or Mexican American. I always felt like he was a bit of a stereotype, so I wanted to tread carefully.

[Video]

[itcanwait]

Bro...bro do you?

[He's set up the phone so that he can step back to like up a very large truck and bench presses it a few times. He puts it down and turns into his human form and grabs the phone and runs before the owner notices.]

I don't think you'd have anything for me to use. Or in my size. Uh actual size, not this.

[video]

[majorlyugh]

[He laughs, recognizing his Transformer pal (yeah, he's calling him a pal) from his last post.]

BRO. DON'T EVEN TEST ME, BRO. BE MY BRO, BRO!

Your human form is so ... tiny.

Hmm. What about an outdoor section of the facility?

video;

[cleptes]

Where do you propose to set up this gym?

[Because she might be interested.]

[video]

[majorlyugh]

The space is in Maurtia Falls. Made the most sense since it's also where I live!

Plus, I know the general area could use some stimulation economically. I mean, the legal kind. [He laughs a bit.] Hopefully this can help with that a little.

video;

[lightinside]

That's great news!

[Laurel gives him a bright smile.]

I could maybe help part time? I'll need to work something out with my current employer.

[video]

[majorlyugh]

Hey, thanks! [He grins brightly.] Yeah, it's going a lot better than I could've expected, give my Murphy's Law history, so I don't wanna jinx it, but so far, so good.

Yeah? I'd love that, if you wanted to do that! I mean, I don't want to get you in trouble with your job or anything, but if you could spare the time, I'd love to have you join the staff. Anything in particular you might wanna do?

video

[deadsmizing]

Should we be taking... something from this about how this place is going to be... run?

[video]

[majorlyugh]

What, my awesome flexing and super huge muscles?

[He tries to dead pan, he really does, but lord almighty, Major just cannot do it for long. He shakes his head as he laughs.]

Nah, I just needed a hook. I need to work on my elevator pitch, but I wasn't sure how to do it without starting it off looking like an idiot. People like that, right? Ideally, I'd like to be pretty laid back - made for imPorts (and natives), made better with their help and suggestions. I always like going to the gym and stuff for the socialization aspect, though I also understand that's not everyone's cup of tea. So I wanna make it inviting and open for those who do wanna chat it up while they squat 600 lbs, but also not mandatory for those who'd rather zone out and speak to no one under penalty of death.

video

[burlyboy]

Oh, hell yeah! I mean, employment-wise, I'm all full-up, but I could do with a new gym. What's the whole weight situation looking like right about now? You got the big ones for all the guys here with superstrength?

[ Which Magnus technically does not really have, but he'll still kill himself trying to lift their weights anyway. #SWOLELYFE ]

[video]

[majorlyugh]

Hey, can't employ anyone if there aren't any patrons!

I'm going to have a pretty big range - the typical things you'd find at most gyms, like 1lb dumbbells up to 300 or 400lbs, but then expand to the 3000lb area. I can add onto it as needed, but I figure that's a good place to start.

video

[h2no]

[BIG POUT.]

...My best friend talks like that.

[video]

[majorlyugh]

Like ...

what?

Text, Private.

[wearmyface]

[Gym? Vos'd be up for that, but that's not really what's caught his attention.]

I know my way around maintenance.

[text, private]

[majorlyugh]

ah! that's great! maintenance would def be important. what kinda stuff have you done before with it?