maskormenace | Entries tagged with keith kogane

March 2021

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WILL YOU HELP SAVE THE WORLD?

Mask or Menace is a panfandom urban 'superhero' genre DWRP game, where heroes, villains, and everyone in between seek to survive and thrive in a world loosely parallel to our own.

lonered

[There had been about five minutes or so where Keith thought maybe he had managed to dodge the latest weirdness going around this place.

No such luck. For anyone who knows him, the first sign is he fact that his usually very-mullet-y hair has gone and grown in overdrive overnight. He's mostly tamed it into a braid that falls over one shoulder.

The second sign is the fact that there are a pair of small fluffy bird flitting about and occasionally landing to tuck little sprigs of leaves and flowers into said braid. Or the chipmunk who is sitting in front of him also watching the video.]

So... anyone figured out what we need to do to get the latest strange happenings to stop happening?

[Will it run its course or is there something causing this that needs to be dealt with? The chipmunk turns around and chatters at him and Keith winces.]

What? No, I'm not complaining or anything, really. You guys are great. That's not it.

[There are so many woodland critters who have decided he's their best friend. And he can understand them like they're speaking English. And he realizes he's talking to a chipmunk on camera and clears his throat and looks back to the camera.]

Things are a little weirder than usual right now.

Anyway, I've been talking with my wolf friend, too. Turns out he's okay with being called Kosmo, so that's good. He's pretty sure we couldn't pronounce his actual name. I think he's right.

[So hey that's a bright side.] I guess if anyone wants to know what their pet is saying, I'm your guy until this wears off.

jichengren

[ The first thing you'll notice about the video broadcast is the loud, shrill sounds of a fire alarm going off. The next thing you'll notice is the smoke filled kitchen where the video is being filmed. The third thing you'll notice is a harried looking young man with long black hair and pristine pale yellow robes, holding the camera uncertainly, as though he doesn't fully trust it. Keen eyed viewers will pick up on the crown of blue feathers poking out of the top of the man's head. They don't seem to be bothering him, but maybe he just hasn't noticed they're there... ]

I was told this tool could be used to communicate messages. I am in need of assistance.

[ He glances back over his shoulder, where there is a microwave that is clearly on fire. ]

I only tried to prepare some soup. The small heating box must be possessed by an evil spirit. It's wailing pains my ears and I cannot get it to stop. I cannot tame it alone. Please respond with all haste.

[ And then he just... puts the comm down, face up on the kitchen table, so that it is left recording the ceiling for a minute or so before the feed shuts off. ]

lonered

[Keith isn't really one to talk about his feelings. But he's been thinking about this a lot recently, and somehow putting it in writing is easier than saying it out loud. So have a text post.]

Weird shit happens so regularly here that hearing about it feels like checking the weather forecast. But actual people are getting hurt, imPort and civilians. It's a mess. And we're always caught just reacting.

I realize there's not much we can do except be ready to react. But I hate not being able to get ahead of it.

[And that's the frustrating thing here. Back home it was always one battle to the next, one catastrophe after another, but it felt like there was at least some things they could control. They knew what they were facing. The threat was Zarkon and the Galra Empire, later Lotor. They could have strategies. Make plans. Proactively attack instead of just defensively reacting. Here... the dangers come out of left field with no way to predict them until they're already happening.

And Keith isn't the type to enjoy having so much out of his control. What's more...]

And then the in between time is so normal, somehow that's even weirder. Some days the world is ending. Some days monsters are eating people in the city parks. Some days I'm doing laundry and worrying about what to get my boyfriend for his birthday.

For the record, the last one is somehow the hardest.

[World ends and monsters he can usually swing a sword at. Birthday shopping? Brutally difficult when he wants to do this right and not screw it up and-- Anyway..]

I don't suppose anyone has any advice.

For dealing with the whiplash, I mean, not the birthday present part.

...

Actually I'd probably take that sort of advice too.

lonered

[So, Keith looks... harried. He's holding it together, but he's also very clearly tense. Now, Keith isn't exactly Mr. Carefree Happy-go-lucky at the best of times, but there is an added seriousness in his expression, even more intensity in the gaze that he fixes on the camera.

And, maybe most telling, he looks worried.]

Shiro is missing.

[He can't say gone. He can't. Not again. Even if he has been told how this place works, knows full well that people come and go. He knows that rationally, but rationality has never really been the ruling concept where Shiro is involved.]

I can't find him anywhere. I can't get him on the comms. He was next to me in bed last night, and then he wasn't. I didn't hear him get out of bed. He just vanished.

[He takes a breath. His voice is mostly level still, threatening to fracture at the edges.]

I know the Porters do things, but...

[He trails off and shakes his head, like he doesn't want to finish. Now, when it turns out that Shiro's port out was very temporary Keith will briefly wonder if he overreacted a bit, but since that hasn't happened yet, he thinks he's being very restrained. Nothing is on fire and he hasn't threatened anyone in the government yet. That's personal growth.]

There has to be someway to know for sure. To do something.

[His frustration bleeds through on the last word, down to the clenched fists that he forces open to reach out and turn off the video.]

lonered

I realize there's a lot going on right now with the weird cryptic messages and everything, but has ANYONE figured out a way to stop the whole bursting into song and dance thing?

I really need it to stop. Now.

[So there's a reason Keith is doing this post as a text post. But given the way all of this has been going, is it any wonder that his video flips on to show him, very dramatically silhouetted in a window, back lit and, well, let's just call it so emo. Music begins in the background, soft at first, but it slowly crescendos and Keith starts singing,]

On my own, pretending he's beside--

[And the look of horror on his face is the last thing the camera sees as he grabs for it and turns it back to text. He's still singing, dramatically, but at least it's not being broadcast anymore. Back to text. Nice, safe, un-mortifying text.]

I don't even know Les Mis.

This has to stop. I really need to go grocery shopping.

[Instead he's holed up in his room trying to smother himself with a pillow to make the singing stop. Why. Him.]

viciousmaukery

Anyone else find it a little unsettling that someone sent every single one of us a bizarrely cryptic puzzle?

[Molly is definitely unsettled. His hand's shaking as he pushes it through his hair.]

I mean, the bizarre messages are one thing, but whoever they are, they somehow got their hands on everyone's numbers. And by everyone, I mean specifically imPorts, I showed this to a local and she thought I was fucking with her somehow. So it's just us.

It's creepy, right? I'm well aware everyone's excited over the chance to solve a puzzle, but this wasn't just a network post, this was a personal message. That's the strangest part about all this: why not just use the network? Why go through every single one of us, one by one, and send a private message?

[He scrubs his tattooed hand over his face, and lets out a mirthless chuckle.]

I hope I'm overthinking this. I really do hope I'm overthinking this. But I just—I feel like this is cursed, somehow.

usaf

[ The video opens on Carol at the airfield where she works, finishing up some maintenance on a Cessna Skywagon. She has a rag in one hand and a wrench in the other, her phone propped up on something to capture the scene. ]

There have been some more... informal polls online lately. [ She's looking at you, Bow... ] For once, I have a more serious question to ask.

I've been giving a lot of thought to what I'm going to do with my time here. So far, I've been assigned the job of Flight Instructor at Heropa Airfield, which... Don't get me wrong, it fits. I can do it. But it's not exactly what I've been training my whole life to do. Back home, a... while ago, admittedly... I was in the Air Force. And I heard that imPorts can join the Air Force here, but there's a caveat: They need to be registered first.

I've been here a couple months now, but I haven't registered yet, because I don't know how I should feel about the government having my name on a list. That's why I'm coming to you, for... advice, I guess? Opinions?

Should I register? Should I not? What are the pluses and minuses to each option?

[ Okay, that's enough sincerity for one afternoon. Carol's face breaks out in a sarcastic grin. ]

Or if you just want to tell me your favorite animal, that's fine, too.

lonered

[This is new for Keith. He monitors the network, of course, too paranoid not to pay attention to everything that's going on around him, but actually posting something? It's out of his comfort zone. ~~It's the vlog all over again.~~

So he looks awkward, like he can't believe he's actually doing this. But he is. He's still wearing the green apron that makes up his uniform (the Moonbucks logo just barely visible in frame), mullet tamed back into a little ponytail. He's got a coffee in his hands, and he's tucked himself at a table back in the far corner of the cafe he works in. He's on break.]

Is it really that bad if someone spells your name wrong on a coffee cup? I mean, the drink's right. I always get the drink right. Isn't that the important part?

[Someone has had a few complaints apparently.] It's loud and busy in here. How am I supposed to hear the difference between Bob and Bog? ...Bog could be a name. I know I've met a Bog.

[They were an alien, but that is not the point. He spreads his hands in a "see? a point!" gesture. And in this gesture he uncovers his own name written on his cup. Somehow he's left off the "h" and and scrawled the "t" in such a way that it looks more like a "f" and anyway, he's currently drinking a coffee that belongs to "Keif."

This problem goes deep.

Anyway.]

Sometimes I think this job isn't a great fit. Also I'm pretty sure I'm going to smell like pumpkin spice for the rest of my life. There's not even any pumpkin in it.

[Keith's having that kind of day.

Anyone who wants to catch him in person at work, feel free to find him brooding into his coffee on his break. And feel free to have been personally victimized by Keith's inability to get names right on coffee orders.]

patchricide

[The princess looks completely dejected as she starts,] If you'll forgive the interruption? I would like to ask for a favor.

I was making preparations for some festivities next month, and I was referred to a team of designers who will bring your clothing designs to life. Their work is lovely — they had everything from formal wear to award-winning FanPort cosplay costumes!

So, I contacted them with a design of my own, in hopes of having something special to wear. Now... admittedly, I'm not much of an artist. [She holds up a piece of paper...]

( BRACE YOURSELF, FRIENDS )

But I thought it actually turned out well this time! It's certainly not lifelike, but it's a perfectly fine diagram, isn't it? At least the details are nice and clear!

Somehow, the shop mistook it for a Halloween monster costume, even though it's obviously supposed to be a gown. Perhaps someone could try redrawing it a little bit better?

tricksterofasgard

[ Gold. Hopefully you like gold, because you will see a lot of it. Heavy golden walls behind a large golden throne. Comfortably seated within? A potentially new face, looking pleased and overall just friendly enough despite being clad in full armor, complete with large, horned helmet and holding a golden spear in his hand.

Can you possibly see through illusions? Then enjoy Loki occupying a regular living room while casually holding a broom. He's just here to deliver a show, really. The armor and helmet are real, however.

After permitting the image to settle for a moment, he finally speaks. Loki's initial words are measured carefully. ]

Mortals of this realm.

[ He raises from his throne and takes a step forward before settling into a meaningful pose. ]

You have earned yourself the protection of a god.

[ You get another moment to take this in. Or just enjoy looking at this god. Then, all of Loki's dignified behavior and display slips away in favor of a wide, open grin and his unoccupied hand gestures lightly. ]

They could have just asked, though. You know? Instead of just pulling me here and--

[ He lets that trail off with a dismissive wave of his hand. Let's not talk about that, okay? ]

I am Loki. Rightful King of Asgard.

[ That same hand that has just been gesturing dismissively is now placed over his own chest as Loki offers a bow to his audience. ]

And I look forward to serving you.

[ For his roommates at Nonah #004: Your living room is currently stuck under an illusion. You will find yourself stepping right into Asgard's throne room. It's painfully golden. Enjoy your new Asgardian pest. ]

forgeabettertomorrow

[Like most any other time, Darin's broadcasting from his forge which...well, it's certainly gotten bigger. In the last few months, Darin's annexed two more warehouses adjacent to the one his forge started in, turning the place into a surprisingly large complex.]

So, I've been giving it a lot of thought and, as amazing and talented as I am, even I have limitations to the amount of work I can put out. This place is growing faster than I ever dreamed and I think it's about time I do what has to be done.

So Darin Altway's Masterworks is hiring!

Do you have a passion for creating weapons, armor, and gear for your fellow imPorts? Do you just enjoy tinkering and doing repairs? Do you like science, engineering, and technology? Are you excited by the prospect of building a functioning beam saber?

Then I could definitely use your help. I'm looking for a few people to help me keep up with the orders I receive around here, as well as invent new, safe technology and gear that can help imPorts with the various crap that seems to be thrown at us every other week.

If you're hired, consider the Forge at your disposal to make and test whatever you see fit in your personal time. Also, I pay well.

Anyone looking for work?

adultwonder

[Dick gives a half smile and a little wave to the camera. To those who know him well, he looks a little flustered. But this has been a weird week]

Hey, everyone. Dick Grayson, here, I'm a new guy. And I've got a question. Is there any way to practice or tamp down a power that’s… kind of passive?

[There’s a light growling sound, Dick turns and raises a hand.]

Just a minute! [He looks back at the camera.] This is just getting a little--

[Before he can finish his sentence, there’s another growl and a blur of sandy colored fur tackles Dick. A very large blur of sandy colored fur. It is, in fact, a lion. But he’s not trying to hurt Dick. He’s just licking his face and looking very happy with himself. Dick laughs and rubs the lion’s face, then looks upside-down at the camera.]

This is the second time Chewie’s escaped from the zoo and followed me home. I’m pretty sure the neighbors are gonna start complaining soon. So, any thoughts?

[Sorry residents of Nonah #004, this is happening in your living room.]

spaceforged

[There's a click as the video turns on and the faint recording light reflects on the visor of a helmet beside a calm looking man. He pushes it out of the way with his metal right hand and nods to the screen.] Hello, I've heard I've been here before. Sorry to anyone who knew me, I came back without those memories. I don't foresee them coming back. To those who have never seen me before, I'm Shiro. A pleasure to meet you, despite the circumstances behind it.

[He leans back in his seat and it makes the scar across the bridge of his nose stand out. His hair is cut short except for a shock of white in the front. He glances to the side briefly and back into at the viewers. He's clearly used to speaking for an audience.] But that's not why I turned this on. ...I have a few questions and hopefully, someone has an answer.

First, I'd like to know what we've found out so far about these rocks coming from space. Do we even know where they're coming from? I've seen a few types and have an idea what they do but comparing experiences and confirming it would be better than going on an assumption.

[The man pauses here, and says a little less formally. His voice a little quieter.]

And I'd like to ask how often people from the same universe arrive here from different points in time. Do we ever gain the time that we're missing? I'd just like to know what to expect. Thank you.

lootsnshoots

Hey guys, Cayde-6 again. Feelin' a little—okay a lot bored so sound off: who here is from space? I mean technically everybody's from space but if you're "from space" you get my meaning, right? I'm right. So. You're from space. You've got cool space tech, right? Tell me all about it. Got ray guns? Floating tanks? Shiny rocks that set things on fire? Lemme know.

And hey, if you're feelin' left out because your society hasn't figured out how to break atmo and colonize a moon yet, gimme a song rec or two. I'm trying to put together a patrol playlist.

legionnaires

So I need some... pet advice?

It's complicated. She won't listen to me no matter how many times I tell her it's a Halloween costume. How do you explain to your dog that she can't chase kids on the beach in a spider costume?

[ He turns the video to a shot of Kosmo dressed in a spider costume. It looks ridiculous considering Kosmo is much bigger then a normal dog, but also equally as terrifying because just as he keeps the camera trained on her, she teleports out of view. ]

I've tried hiding it but she's smart and finds it every time. I am out of options and I really don't want to see her bounding down the beach again after screaming kids.

patchricide

[This one might seem like a strange video feed.]

[The camera is focused on Allura, lying in bed, sound asleep. With an emphasis on sound — her body is not just still, but actually appears to be motionless, as if not even shallow breathing is disturbing this deep rest.]

[Her expression is calm and yet... not content? There's something sad playing on her features, as if she's slightly in pain, but too tired to properly show it.]

[The camera rests on this, as if she might disappear at any moment. Or, more accurately, if lingering on this view is meant to add to the drama factor of this particular post...]

[... ... ...]

[And then—]

HATCHOO!!

[Her whole body flinches with an aggressive, un-dainty sneeze. It's followed by two more—] HATCHOO!! HATCHOO!!! [— and then Allura sits up, grumbling and groaning, her cheeks flush, her sparkling rainbow eyes now red and bleary. And that's not even touching on her hair. It's normally voluptuous, but after having spent the better part of the day in bed, she has a remarkable case of bedhead that's causing the fluffy curls to go everywhere.]

[She blows her nose, finishes a glass of water that was sitting on her nightstand, and flops back down on the pillows with a soft groan.]

I didn't think there was an Earth virus that Alteans could catch. I hope this fever breaks before I start breaking out in spots...

[This is a public service announcement: Please vaccinate your aliens. We don't want them catching any viruses, bacteria, or other unsavory entities.]

lasersounds

[The entire length of the video is focused on a kitchen counter, much like the one in the image below.]

I honestly have no idea what Keith is up to in the kitchen but...Do I really want to know?

Taking bets and guesses.

continuousgroaning

my parents ran a restaurant back home, my siblings and I helped, and we all lived in an apartment on top of it

i'm so used to noise and company and people always being around. Whether it's people talking, the sound of the grill or the refrigerator, the noise of the tv, my parents snoring at night, my brother playing music, whatever

point being it sometimes feels so empty and quiet with just me and mom at our new place plus after everything that's happened lately I'd like some company

so i'm hosting a Friendsgiving kind of thing?? today where you're welcome to stop in Casa Belcher, Heropa #006 and have some company and a hot meal.

i'm going to have a burger station in case anyone really does want to try that hideous raisin burger, and some thanksgiving-type food, and dessert

thanks!!

patchricide

[As the camera turns on, your eyes are immediately directed towards a massive pile of leftover Halloween candy spread out over a table. At least, most of it is Halloween candy, and some of it is really good, like those peanut butter cups and little candy-coated morsels. But there's not a lot of quality control here, so some of it is terrible Halloween candy, and some upon further inspection is not Halloween candy at all.]

[In fact, there's some Christmas candies as well, including those really good hazlenut chocolates, and a few peppermints. There's also some of those mysterious strawberry hard candies that old ladies keep in candy bowls, tiny boxes of raisins, and... cough drops? Yup, those are cough drops. At the edge of the screen, a pair of mouse are helping themselves to one of the oddities, a small bag of peanuts like you might find on an airline.]

[And then there's Allura, sitting at the table with a pout of discontent on her face. After all, she had been invited to a Halloween party at the last minute, and she didn't have roommates to stay home on Halloween, so...]

If I had known I wasn't going to be handing out any Halloween candy, I would never have bought so much.

Particularly since I can't feed most of this to my mice. [As if on cue, a bigger, chubby yellow mouse picks up a bag of sour gummies and starts inspecting it — and without looking, Allura reaches over and pulls the bag out of his tiny little paws.] In fact, some of it I'm not sure if I ought to be eating.

This one is made with boiled animal bones, and coated in dried, powdered acid. It's supposed to be so sour that you will start crying in pain. Is this actually supposed to be a 'treat'?

[She gives a long sigh.] What am I supposed to do with all this? No matter how dubious the ingredients are, it seems like such a waste to throw it all away...

lootsnshoots

Listen up people of Earth, this is Cayde-6 speaking. First point of order: I have been informed that I'm your new Gun Safety Campaign Spokesman and I am very happy to keep your guns safe. Safe with me because my gun didn't make the trip and I'm feeling so very, very, very naked without it. If anyone can give me a loaner I'll owe ya big time.

Point number two: Just ... think of this as one of those ice-breaking exercises. You know the ones where everybody's awkward and doesn't wanna talk but you gotta answer some stupid question? One of those. Just. Just out of idle curiosity: what is your favorite thing about Earth? It can be anything, doesn't matter how small. In fact, it might be the small things that are the most important. Asking for a friend who isn't used to seeing it so ... intact.

[He counts out his fingers to four, thinks again, and subtracts one.]

Aaand number three: gimme the skinny on good places to eat around Maurita Falls? Extra points for good ramen joints. And I mean the real stuff, none of that instant business.

MASK OR MENACE

NETWORK COMMUNITY

Entries tagged with keith kogane | black paladin

March 2021

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WILL YOU HELP SAVE THE WORLD?

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16. Thank You For Bean A Friend

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