[Video]

[lootsnshoots]

Listen up people of Earth, this is Cayde-6 speaking. First point of order: I have been informed that I'm your new Gun Safety Campaign Spokesman and I am very happy to keep your guns safe. Safe with me because my gun didn't make the trip and I'm feeling so very, very, very naked without it. If anyone can give me a loaner I'll owe ya big time.

Point number two: Just ... think of this as one of those ice-breaking exercises. You know the ones where everybody's awkward and doesn't wanna talk but you gotta answer some stupid question? One of those. Just. Just out of idle curiosity: what is your favorite thing about Earth? It can be anything, doesn't matter how small. In fact, it might be the small things that are the most important. Asking for a friend who isn't used to seeing it so ... intact.

[He counts out his fingers to four, thinks again, and subtracts one.]

Aaand number three: gimme the skinny on good places to eat around Maurita Falls? Extra points for good ramen joints. And I mean the real stuff, none of that instant business.

Comments

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[ghoulking]

It's hard to say "favorite". But I like the forests a lot. Quiet place and not covered in lights from the cities.

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[lootsnshoots]

Well. Good news, I guess, is that when I'm from there are plenty of forests and very little in the way of city lights.

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[legosi]

On my Earth, I like bugs a lot.

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[lootsnshoots]

I did ask for small things, didn't I. Well also good news from the future: we still got bugs.

[Video]

[generalgrievous]

I have guns but they are being used for combat training. If you have need of any instruction, you can come to my classes.

As for two... I am becoming fond of Heropa's beach. It reminds me of home.

And I would advise you to keep away from Maurtia Falls. There are some unsavory elements living there.

[Video]

[lootsnshoots]

Okay, weird. Why is a Fallen Vandal here and why are you volunteering your arms to me? Not that I'm complaining on that point, but still we can agree that's not generally how our dates tend to go.

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[isthatyou]

[Hello just your average every day plant boy here.]

That there's lots to explore, I guess.

What happened to "your friend"'s earth?

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[lootsnshoots]

Definitely getting a theme here today with this one, and that's "stuff you still got in the when you're from." There's probably a lesson in that somewhere.

[In a loud, affected stage whisper]

So green ... wowww

[He taps the screen, as if he were trying to poke you]

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[drivesadesk]

The food. It's amazing. You should try coffee, chocolate, and deep fried things.

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[lootsnshoots]

Check, check, aaaand check. Still got those in the City.

[He does a quick appraisal.]

Nice ... scales?

video;

[fightforcause]

[Looks at him curiously. He doesn't like being without his blaster, either.] I can understand feeling naked without a gun, but are you really willing to just take a random one from someone else? You don't know where it's been.

[Pauses.] As for the second, what if this is the first time you've ever been to Earth? I've never been on this planet before, there's a first time for everything, right?

video;

[lootsnshoots]

[Cayde shrugs and sighs, pitifully.]

Slumming it with what you can find is something every Guardian goes through. I'm not happy to lose my exotic custom piece but I can make do.

And I'm from here, actually. Just from later ... when it's mostly wrecked by bad things from outer space.

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[onlydoubts]

The food here is amazing. If you haven't already tried pizza, I'd highly recommend it.

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[lootsnshoots]

I'm a big fan, actually. Sausage, mushroom, fried egg, extra mayo? Incredible.

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[bookkeeper]

We'll start from the bottom up— I mostly hang around De Chima. I can give you the skinny on food joints from there.

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[lootsnshoots]

Okay, okay I'm listening. Light knows I've traveled further for less.

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[fource]

[Quatre's been here long enough that mechanical aliens (?) are no longer a surprise to see, but that doesn't stop them from being lowkey fascinating. Good thing he's always prepared with Cool Things About Earth.]

I'd say natural landscapes. Sunsets, especially over water, or the view from the top of a valley. Deserts and sand dunes. --That might be bigger than what you were looking for, I'm sorry. [He smiles self-deprecatingly, before he asks a little softer] What do you mean by not intact?

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[lootsnshoots]

Oh, we still have plenty of that. Sun still rises and sets over mountains and valleys and oceans and all that good stuff. It's just that we don't got much by way of civilization left among those things.

Video

[darkpants_warmfeeling]

[The guy in the video is wearing some kind of grey-patterned superhero armour, and has the fit, alert bearing of a military background.]

The Burger Bunker is the place to eat in Maurtia Falls if you like things greasy. But when it comes to ramen, you're probably better off going to a different city.

Can I ask what happened to Earth, where your 'friend' is from?

Video

[lootsnshoots]

[Were it not for the situation, Cayde would immediately clock him as a Titan with restrained taste in shaders and shoulder pads.]

Good intel, I'll mark that down.

[He opens a paperback book to a back page and scrawls "BURGER BUNKER (GREASY!)" on a back page]

We had an unfortunate near-total apocalypse when an evil force from space devastated civilization several centuries back. Down to just one city.

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[psychophilia]

[see in this video a woman, chewing gum and leaning her elbows on a counter next to a register. Behind her? A wall of guns.]

Did ya blow up the Earth?

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[lootsnshoots]

[Hello new friend, or at least person I will pester constantly and consider a friend, regardless.]

No. But I blow up bad guys who are into some flavor of persuasion of blowing up Earth.

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[burlyboy]

The answer is dogs. The answer is always dogs.

I got a lot of, uh, food-related haunts in Maurtia Falls, but none of 'em serve ramen. I'm more of a meat and potatoes kind of guy.

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[lootsnshoots]

[His eyes perk up, excited.]

They've got dogs here? Real dogs?

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[storyseeker]

You know no one's going to give you a safety gun for you to curl up with at night, right? Unless they're really dumb.

[Which makes it possible, she supposes.]

Also there's a killer taco place on Sixth Avenue downtown.

video;

[lootsnshoots]

Wow, that's rude. Who doesn't give a wayward soul a gun?

Video;

[lasersounds]

Can't give up my gun, sorry. It kind of has an "auto-recall" feature.

Uh...as for the favorite about Earth? Probably the fact it's my home. Varadero and its beaches, the garlic knots--I mean the food, in general, can't be beat, you know? Lots to love about Earth.

Video;

[lootsnshoots]

I love it too, that's why I wanna see more of it in its prime.

[codeoracle]

I can't give you ramen, and we aren't in Maurita Falls, but if you're down in Nonah look up Cafe LeBlanc. Great coffee, better curry.


...Question: You're robotic, right? Can you even taste the stuff?

[lootsnshoots]

Curry, very promising! I'll put it on my list.

And yes, I am robotic and yes I can taste it. I like spicy food.

video;

[legionnaires]

Can you expand on "intact"?

[ There's a small pause, before he decides to answer his likely more important question. ]

There's a ramen restaurant called Misoya in Heropa you could try.

video;

[lootsnshoots]

We had a wee bit of a civilization-ending dark cosmic force destroying everything apocalypse, followed by centuries of being under siege by like, a ton of super bad aliens.

[His eyes widen and he jots down the name and location of the restaurant and a little doodle of a bowl full of ramen with lots of exclamation points]

I could kiss you right now. Well, I couldn't, on account of not having lips per se and you're way too young for me but I'm getting way off track. My gratitude, you've got it.

[pidgewidgeon]

[ Pidge is just going to stare for a few minutes in absolute amazement. Cayde is completely unique to anything else that Pidge has ever seen and she might be in geek love. Please ignore the hearts she must have in her eyes. ]

Quiznak you're so amazing.

[lootsnshoots]

It's Cayde. It rhymes with "spade?" You know, the card suit?

But yes. I am so amazing.

permavid

[killtime]

I don't know if there's "good places" to eat around Maurtia Falls so much as places where you're less likely to get knifed.

[lootsnshoots]

Well who doesn't love a little danger to go with fine dining?

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[ambasciatore]

[ He's torn between awe and curiosity. ]

What are you?

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[lootsnshoots]

Short answer: a really cool robot. Long answer: a really cool robot who used to be human.

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[am_i_a_monster]

I know that feeling. I wish I could carry my rifle with me everywhere I go. It'd probably be easier to get a new firearm than expect anyone to let you borrow theirs.

Music, art, food, friends and pets are my favourite things. And freedom for those of us who have it. Nature too. And beautiful buildings. [She smiles.] It's too hard to pick just one. Do you have a favourite thing?

You can make your own ramen. It's not that different from making other noodles, but you need kansui.

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[lootsnshoots]

Those are good picks; I like those things too. My favorites are my ramen joint in the City, finding sweet loot, and making my friends laugh.

[It's not the real answer, but close enough.]


I'm not allowed near stoves after ... well, we just don't talk about it.