maskormenace | [video]

[the video starts in a kitchen at some sort of restaurant, at the floor until this angel maxie here slaps the communicator on a counter. he looks like he usually does only in an apron. he is not pleased.

behind him a big fluffy camel thing with volcano back is kind of lounging lazily around. someone should probably explain pokemon don't belong in the kitchen!! maxie!!

he takes a deep breath before speaking, testily.] I'm on this network to inquire what 'yakitori house' is. Or are. And why they require.... 'hotties.'

[a sign in the background proclaims this HOTTIES WITH STICKS YAKITORI HOUSE.

maxie sighs, leaning back on what is obviously a hot stove. his palm makes full contact and he doesn't blink, just leaves it there. the camerupt sort of lifts it's head as it notices this and maxie apparently doesn't.]

Cooking I understand, it's formulaic. A challenge I, Maxie, will rise to, if need be. When in Johto- [the camerupt makes a mildly distressed sound and maxie turns to it, brow raised.] What is it? I know very well you're not hungry, don't try that on me.

[camerupt makes more sounds please save it's trainer from himself dear god.]

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[ah, he was right, and he looks pleased by this.] A fine Arcanine. [he just... loves fire pokemone. fuck.]

[right the gremlin. his brow furrows. losers? losers??] Yes, I am from Hoenn. I assume you're talking about Archie, unless there's another I don't know about... oh, Matt.

[deep. sigh.]

You bet he is! Cuz I raised 'im! [Blue's obnoxious grin only intensifies- akin to, perhaps you could say, the sun's rays under the influence of Primal Groudon.] If you're not a complete Feebas, you can come meet him. Oh, and the rest of my team, I guess.

--Oh. 'Course you know Archie... My condolences, hahaha! [File under: things one would say to people acquainted with Blue.] Yeah, I just met that meathead, too. So that means... You're Team Magma, right? ...You strong?

[maxie has a look that says he believes this is a fine arcanine DESPITE this gremlin man. rude.] You seem vaguely familiar, I assume you're a well known trainer, with that talk. Who are you?

Thank you, he is a trial I face daily. [~friendship~ the mention of team magma makes him tense, expecting outrage or judgment. weirdly the goblin creature isn't??] Yes, I am the leader of Team Magma. Reformed, in case there was any concern. [he is not going to be competitive. he is not. yes he is he adjusts his glasses animely] I would imagine so. Only a battle would show you for certain that I, Maxie, am not to be trifled with.

[pokemon jesus.]

Who am I? [Oh good Maxie you asked ~the magic question~, prepare for maximum obnoxious grin:] Blue Oak, former Kanto Champ and Gym Leader! If you don't live under a rock, you prolly heard my name around. I'm only like, one of the strongest trainers in the world.

[He looks kinda skeptical of Maxie's strength, but then he takes notice of his glasses.] Oh yeah, huhn. I don't really care how you screwed up with those legendary Pokémon, May fixed you good anyhow.

...That's a Mega Stone you got there, isn't it? [He gestures to the screen, around his own eyes to indicate them.] You as much a pushover as Archie, even with that?

[his face says he already Regrets this] Ah, I suppose I have heard of you. Weren't you deposed by another trainer. [r u d e]

[god damn you blue!! he just nods.] ... so she did. [and on to other shit, he touches his glasses] Yes, it is. Oh, you've fought Archie, have you? It's not hard to be less of a pushover than him, really.

[bullshit maxie his type literally oneshots you you idiot]

[A reasonable sentiment, but Blue doesn't catch it, since he's too busy bragging. Speaking of which, his expression falters when Maxie's already got one over him. Damn it.] --Yeah whatever, no Champ stays on his throne forever. And Red's here too. But if you think I'd lose to some Hoenn loser like you, you're Buggin'!

[He already lost to May but shhhh it was close!! And she's from Johto anyway. Totally doesn't count.]

I thrashed him, of course! He's not strong enough to take on a Champ like me. But hey, you wanna give it a go, I'm a gracious guy. Never hurts to give any trainer a chance to face me!

[And then he can study what Mega-Evolution tactics you use.]

From what I understand it was a rather short reign. [a lot of shit talk for a guy who's about to get his ass kicked, maxie. still, he's just. the worst so what did you expect.

and of course he poses dramatically without even realizing] I'll warn you, Blue Oak, my tactics are not the same as Archie's.

[even though they have two of the fucking same pokemon!!!]

Very well, a battle then. Where do trainers typically battle here?

Oh yeah, kinda like your plans with those ancient Pokémon, huh? [Blue drawls, obviously annoyed. Just try it, old man- just try him.]

Aaaanyway, being stronger than everyone else other than one guy is still better than most, and that includes you, I'll bet! But I'm humble, I'll give you a shot.

[He grins like an asshole and shrugs. So humble.] What city are you in? Usually the parks are the best spots. Wide open and not too many people in the way. [But really, they should know better than to wander into the middle of a magical animal fight, sheesh!]

Edited 2017-10-11 00:43 (UTC)

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