[video] a valentines themed promotional video (brought to you by the shameless cast)

[gentrify]

[ Greetings, friends. Remember when Mickey said he was selling guns? Yeah, he's still doing that, but now, with a building and less so out of the trunk of his car, PLUS one (1) actual employee. So here he is, in said building, walls behind him lined with weaponry and sundries. ]

You wanna know what really says "I love you and I give a shit if you get capped on some sketchy gangland corner of Maurtia Falls" for Valentine's Day?

[ wait for iiiiit ]

A gun.

[ Or knife, or machete, or sword. They've started carrying some swords too, because they know some of you are ancient fucks and can't handle the idea of catching up to the rest of the world, so there should be some wall in the background with gear more that speed (the speed of a horse drawn carriage). Anyway, back to his sales pitch. ]

Yeah, I know you're all superheros and shit, but some of you fuckin' suck at it, and some of you got the crap end of it with bullshit powers like, I dunno, talking to squirrels or some Disney princess crap. Is a fucking squirrel gonna keep your girlfriend, boyfriend, side piece, whatever from getting mugged? Hell no. [ This place is ridiculous and he hates it. ] Point is, we got Valentine's Day sales going on over here at Southside M&G Armory, so come by and pick up a piece at discount prices.

[ Mickey's about half way through giving the address for the shop (somewhere in Heropa, handwave, la de da), when the distinct hiss of a spray can coming from somewhere off to the side draws his attention, both his attention and the camera of his phone turning in it's direction. There stands: Carl Gallagher, at the sales counter, spray painting a shotgun pastel pink, with a couple others in red and white and purple lying nearby. It's seasonal, ok? ]

Goddamnit, Gallagher, I told you to do that outside, dumbshit! Do your brain cell murder huffing on your own time, away from my merchan--

[ aaand the video cuts. apparently this ad is over. ]

Comments

[heisenbitch]

[ —Junior high? Jesse's eyebrows shoot up, followed by a little frown. Wow, that's... Jesus. Jesse exhales a sigh under his breath. He's not angry at Mickey, not disappointed, just... His mouth twists into a crooked line. ]

Jesus, Mick, you finally got your business legit established, and you got a kid working for you? Selling guns?

[ Come on, man, that ten grand Jesse gave you at Christmas to help you get your business looking all legit was supposed to help you earn the respected businessman status you deserve here. ]

cw: classism

[gentrify]

[ There's a very slow, very dry, arch of his brows, because Jesse Pinkman is the last person to be lecturing him about legit business practices. but that can't be said over the network, private connection or not. ]

He's 17, not really a kid anymore. I was hustling coke at 14. Have you ever actually lived in a ghetto, Jesse? [ For all his thug talk and walk, jesse gets really surprised over stuff that's just common place where carl and mickey come from. ] He's on the payroll 'cause the dumbshit's gonna get himself into something bad one way or another. Better he does it where I can see him.

[ because the gallaghers are family. because regardless of what the status of whatever him and ian are right now is, mickey protects this family with a vengeance. it's just what it is. ]

[heisenbitch]

I'm pointing out how it looks, yo. You're a smart guy, Mick, you've worked hard keeping this business going, and now you finally got a legit set-up, like you deserve. Having a kid on payroll selling guns doesn't exactly portray legit, though, is the point I'm making here. It's the principle of it.

[ Principle. Ha. Like Jesse has any room to talk about principles. Yeah, go ahead and laugh at Jesse's moral code, how he pretends to even have morals, when the business he works best in involves murder and selling poison to people that literally fucks up their entire lives.

A conceding cock of his head, then, though. ]

But you're also right: You know him way better than I do. I'm just— Not judging here, yo, just... [ A motion of his hand between himself and the screen; himself and Mickey. ] Tryna look out for my own, the way you're clearly lookin' out for yours.

[gentrify]

[ ‘like you deserve’ gets another brow raised from him, because since when does he deserve anything legit? When has he ever contributed to society or people outside his family in a real way? This is the first attempt ever to go clean, and it’s only meant as a front besides. He’s still dealing drugs and illegal arms on the side. ]

They let him handle guns in military school, he can handle guns here. Better than most dumb shits I might pull off the street. [ he really doesn’t want to have to hire real employees. Not out of a bunch of strangers. ] Also knows better than to try stealing from me.

[ also also won’t be afraid to pop a cap if someone tries to rob them. But okay, he gets what Jesse’s saying, and mickey shrugs, glancing off to the side. ] I get it, okay. Thanks for the concern, it’s just not something I’m budging on.

[ something something southside rules something. There’s a kind of code where they’re from, and both looking after your own and sharing the wealth are on there. Carl had a guaranteed spot here just by merit of showing up. ]

[heisenbitch]

[ Look, Jesse has a big soft spot for lost kids like Mickey. Sure, Mickey is a man, but Jesse remembers what it was like being nineteen. Nineteen and caught up in crime and doing dumb shit. He knows people would write Mickey off as a piece of shit that doesn't deserve anything. Jesse sees something else entirely than most people would.

Jesse will never budge on his Moral Code about kids, but he knows Mickey ain't gonna budge, too. Which draws a wry smirk out of Jesse despite himself. ]

I know. 'Cause you're a stubborn asswipe like that. [ And Jesse could go on, give other reasons why he's got an issue with it, but... He recognises, too, that it's good for Mickey to finally have somebody from home with him. He doesn't want to shit all over that. So, he continues, like he's just going to drop the subject: ] Kid's sure got a mouth on him.