(no subject)

[photophobic]

[ Kylo's expression is tight, his eyes intensely sharp- and those who have seen him before will note something else, too. His face is scarred- a long, neatly healed line running right over it, from his brow down to his neck. ]

Thankfully, he hasn't taken his clothing off for the occasion. ]

I'm back.

[ That's it. ]

Comments

[articulations]

You're wrong. I have met Ben Solo. It was real. You were a baby. I also saw you as a child. Not the time I chased away your nightmares, but there have been other memories I've experienced. And I hold on to those memories.

[ Her hand feels empty without the silver handle, without its weight. Leia knows he won't do anything to her with it, she believes him. Doesn't need to hear him say it, she just knows. ]

Then what, you're a murderer and a protector?

[ She reaches out to cover his hand, wrapping hers over top of it and her lightsaber. ]

[photophobic]

[ He isn't intimidated by that weighted question. He simply turns it back, his tone unabashedly blunt. ]

Aren't you?

[ He doesn't pull away from her hand- in fact, he offers the weapon back to her with no further comment. ]

[articulations]

I protect the people I love. I offer protection for those unable to fend for themselves. I've killed before, yes, when it was necessary, and I've sent soldiers to their deaths.

I won't make excuses, I'm not perfect. But when I murder, I don't need to take up a separate identity. I continue to go by Leia Organa. Or would you rather I go by Leia Skywalker?

[ The lightsaber is back in her hand and she lets it hang at her side. ]

It doesn't please me to say it, that I'm the daughter of Darth Vader. I'm sure I could come up with a name befitting the relation, if I wished for that.

[photophobic]

You are deliberately missing the point, now. Making false assumptions. This isn't about you or your preferences, and I didn't become Kylo Ren because I murdered somebody.

I would call you by whatever name you asked me to and I am asking you to do the same for me.
It's a simple request.

[articulations]

I've already told you that Kylo Ren is not my son. But if that's what you prefer to be called...

[ She can't stop him from wanting that. If he feels that he's Kylo Ren and no longer Ben Solo, she's done arguing. This is what it has come to.

He should've never left.

Leia moves to go past him for the door. ]

[photophobic]

Then I won't impose on you any longer.

[ So be it. If that is her decision, that is her decision. His jaw tightens. He might want a relationship with his mother, but he won't pretend to be something he is not. He hasn't been Ben Solo since Luke Skywalker crept into his bedroom with his lightsaber to kill him, and as far as he's concerned, when she followed that path, she made the answer to his question very clear.

He waits to be shown the door, pausing on his way out into the cold. ]

But don't pretend this is my choice. You made your decision when you drew that lightsaber.

[ He almost says goodbye, but- no. He can't. He walks out and keeps on going. ]

[articulations]

[ He may be done pretending but this entire time he'd led her to believe that the person she'd had with her really had been Ben Solo. Kylo had not once corrected her. No matter how many times she'd spoken the name Ben, he'd let her.

Leia wants to send a retort after him, remind him that the decision was already made for them when he'd decided it would be such a good idea to kill his father. Instead she shuts the door without watching him stalk off down the front path. Whatever connection she has to him, she cuts it off, silences it; it takes a moment of concentration but once it's done, she's turning to lean into the door and slide down.

The lightsaber drops heavily at her side and she brings her hands to cover her face, knees drawn up. The sob that cuts through the deafening silence is broken, muffled into her palms.

It was time now to bring back up the walls she'd let down; what a mistake it had been to let anyone in. ]