(no subject)

[dendarii]

[ Finally, Miles gets to post to this infamous network. He's been here a week now, and mostly figured himself out, but ...

A smiling, genuine face appears on his end of the viewscreen. Miles has angled his comm such that his unusual stature is nearly invisible. The sharp-eyed might notice the back of his chair being higher than his head, but otherwise he looks quite professional in his neat gray uniform. Very nearly the mercenary fleet admiral he is - is pretending to be - a little bit of both. ]

Good morning - afternoon? Ah, the joys of all being on one planet. My name is Miles Naismith. Admiral of the Dendarii Free Mercenary Fleet. [ A beat; the smile doesn’t waver. ] Alas, I seem to be without both mercenaries and fleet at the moment.

I’m not entirely convinced by this whole registering idea, though. Tell me - those of you who are registered, why do you do it? Ideals? Practicality? Adrenaline?

[ He shifts a bit onscreen - and winces a bit, as an unseen bruise makes itself known. Right, he had another purpose. ]

And - er, are there any healers who are interested in work? I could really use someone dedicated to handling broken bones on a regular basis. I've found one lovely lady already, but it seems prudent to have a list on hand.

Comments

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[driftsintobuffetline]

[It's early morning in Hong Kong, but Newt's always kept weird hours anyway, so replying to someone on the internet at odd hours is not out of the question. Newt is in a tank top and so the extent of his tattoos are on display. He's sitting against the headboard of a bed and, while the lights are on in the hotel room, it is clearly nighttime outside, with the vast array of city lights glowing in through the sliding glass doors (unseen from the pov of the camera).]

Hermann and I registered for practicality: healthcare, the living arrangements, and use of the porters. Nothing altruistic or idealistic about it.

...How bad's the break?

[dendarii]

[ Oh, huh. Of course - instantaneous communication with the other side of the world. It's not as though they're dealing with superluminal distances here, after all. Miles is still a big surprised (and intrigued) by the scenery difference.

More importantly, he brightens seeing Newt again. ]

Hello again, doctor. That seems to be a common response. The porters in particular are very useful ...

[ And he shrugs a bit. ]

Healed for now. Just a crack, really - barely felt it. But with my bone structure, well ... it helps to be prepared.

[driftsintobuffetline]

They really are. The Porters are pretty essential, even if you have access to a car--which we don't, not yet, not aside from a taxi, but SOMEONE is tired of those already. And sure, we know a guy who can generate portals, but Hermann doesn't really like me pestering Qubit for them even in emergencies and Hermann's OWN teleport ability is a bit limited with a passenger, so we like to save that for special--VERY special--occasions. We took a plane here, for example--20 plus hours one-way.

[He nods.]

Have you talked to Lucy--Queen Lucy?. I think she's got a troop of healers she's assembling, some more scientific medicine and others more superpowered. I know a girl in biotech, works in artificial limbs--prosthesis--if you want her number, but I think you'd prefer magic healing since it's available and prosthesis isn't really going to solve the problem, though Winry might have ideas anyway.

How'd this one happen?

[dendarii]

[ Ah, it's soothing to hear Newt's usual torrent of information. Miles takes it all in, listening. ]

Where is "here", anyway? I'm not familiar with the geography of this planet yet? I assume it's a special occasion for the both of you?

... And - goodness, she didn't mention she was a queen. But yes, I've met her. Bone replacements have been discussed for me back home before but consensus was not to implement them until I started shattering more bones. [ A pause. for breath. ] Peter Pan's fault.

[driftsintobuffetline]

[Soothing. Ha ha. Of course.]

We're in Hong Kong. It's something like 12-13 hours time difference from you, halfway across the world, other side of the Pacific Ocean. I'll show you a map sometime, it's unimportant, really, for you to know the geography, just understand that we're uh, many timezones away, with most of the North American continent (because you're East Coast right?) and the Pacific Ocean between us.

Actually, nah, here's a map--finally found one NOT centered on the US. Left-hand side of the Pacific Ocean--find the big orange blob named China. Hong Kong's on the coastline there, south of Taiwan, north of Vietnam.

As for why we're here? [He looks past the phone for a second to someone off camera and across the room. Newt smiles, softly at first, then a little more teasingly.] We're...here on business.


[A wince. The Pan attack is a slightly sore topic. Sort of failed Joaquin there.] Yeah, I heard about Pan, been following updates off and on--sounds like you fared pretty well if all it was was a small break. And Lucy--if she didn't want you to know she's a queen, forget I said anything. She'll tell you if she wants to know. Hermann is a stickler for titles, though, so he doesn't let me forget these things.

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[mathemagier]

[And there's a soft snort off-screen. Usually it's Hermann purposely misrepresenting information and Newton calling him on it, but this time it's the reverse.

'Business' indeed. Not with that smile and tone of voice]

You know you're not very convincing, Newton.

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[dendarii]

[ Oh. Miles' eyes get a little wide at that. That. Well. Goodness. He'll cycle back to the rest of the topics at hand, but first: ]

Business, is it. Good luck in your ... endeavors.

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[driftsintobuffetline]

[Good-naturedly, really. Honest. It's good bickering.] He's an asshole, Miles. Don't listen to this asshole. [He chucks one of the bed pillows forward, clearly at Hermann]

For the record, HE started it. [To Hermann] YOU were the one telling him and Greg that I was your lab-partner. [To Miles] Not to say I'm NOT--I am! And HAVE been for five years. FIVE YEARS, Miles! I've had to put up with this nerd's shit for FIVE YEARS!

[dendarii]

[ Miles can't help but grin a little at that. As perturbing as the mental image of someone with his face sleeping with another man would be. ]

What are you then? Lovers? Husbands?

[driftsintobuffetline]

[Does Newt look scared? Maybe a little. He's definitely turning pink. This kind of question had been so much easier to answer when they WEREN'T together. "Married" was really funny, then. It's still funny, but it's...different. They're Drift Partners, first and foremost. But Drift Partners takes too much explanation that Hermann has sort of forbade him from going in depth on.

But what are they.]

Uh.

[Bail me out here, Hermann.]

We're, uh.
Boyfriends? We're boyfriends. [It sounds juvenile, but he likes it.
He clears his throat.]

Moving on.

[dendarii]

Boyfriends. Noted. And moving on.

[ Because while Miles likes to tease, he's not a dick about it. Usually. ]

It was a small break, fortunately. I stayed out of the fighting anyway just running teleports back and forth - the worst enemy I tangled with was the bathtub. Lucy was very kind.

[driftsintobuffetline]

[Pause. Newt frowns.]

Okay, hold up: before we move on entirely, Hermann and I are having this debate as to whether or not you were convinced about the 'on business' thing before he interrupted, because he's convinced I'm a terrible liar, but that's only because he knew I was ly---Wait a sec, did you say you teleport too? And what the hell were you doing with a bathtub?

[dendarii]

[ These two are adorable. Miles is kind of glad he and Gregor have accidentally fallen in with them. ]

No, not really. You were in a hotel room with sheets rumpled like someone else was there. [ A beat. ] Hermann was a surprise.

And yes, I can teleport. Via pipe fixtures.

[driftsintobuffetline]

[Oh no. Not adorable.

Newt gives a 'shut up' look in Hermann's direction because he's clearly receiving a 'see, I told you so' look from the man. He might even be flipping Hermann off off-camera. Who knows.] I can totally respect that you took in the external cues and everything. Next time I'll stage my lies better. But I'm a little insulted, man. What, you didn't think I could bag a hot nerd like Hermann? You should see him. The epitome of hot nerd-- [he starts to turn the camera around to take in Hermann, who is sitting at a desk in his reading glasses and a pair of mens plaid pjs. Hermann looks back, annoyed.

And then he brings the camera back to himself.]

Pipes. Shit. Wow, okay, literally, that's a pretty shitty power. Hermann at least just re-materializes elsewhere. [Meanwhile Newt's list continues. Same face. Both have physical disabilities. Both teleport. What's next? Both can Drift with Newt? This is getting eerie.] I can see why you'd need a bathtub after that.

What other powers did you get, just the teleport?

[dendarii]

[ Miles chokes a little at the "hot nerd" comment. Really, Hermann. Those glasses. ]

I decline to comment on the attractiveness of a man with my face.

[ He shakes his head a bit, still smiling. ]

I mostly land in the bathtub. Rather heavily. Hence the broken bone. [ The rest of his powers, right. Newt doesn't get to hear about his own telepathic link, especially over an open channel. That leaves only one more. ] I can adjust my size as well.

[driftsintobuffetline]

That's fine. I'm inclined to comment on it enough for the both of us. But it's HERMANN's face. He's had it longer. Besides, you told me you were a clone. It's not even your face to begin with. [He has such tact. Still think he's adorable?]

[In addition to total lack of tact, is he also thirteen? Newt is totally a thirteen year old. He waggles his brows.] He can adjust his size, Hermann.

No, but seriously man, maybe you need to pick a place to teleport people to and then put some padding there. Like, find a safe place with a shower and set up an air mattress next to the drain or something.

[mathemagier]

[Hermann makes a sound of some disgust]

Was that really necessary?

[driftsintobuffetline]

[Laughs] Jealous, Herm?

[mathemagier]

Absolutely not. [Maybe he would if it actually worked that way] Good god, Newton. Must you be obscene?

[driftsintobuffetline]

[Shush. :P He'll be obscene with you later, okay.]

[mathemagier]

[Oh. Well then. Hermann will just go back to reading while you finish your conversation]

[dendarii]

[ Great job saying the exact wrong thing there, Newt. Miles kind of. Makes a face. ]

Well - Lord Vorkosigan had it first, then. Fine. You win.

[ That and the response there. Oh for - why do people assume that? It's not only rude, it's also wildly inaccurate. At last Newt isn't staring at certain body parts the way Text did. ]

Not like that. ... I'm already starting to regret this conversation.

[ The air mattress isn't such a bad idea though. He considers trying that next time. ]

[driftsintobuffetline]

I do win. I get to look at that dumb face.

[Well, of course people assume! Figure out a better way to word it, Miles.]

Par for the course with me, dude. But okay, so how small and how big can you make yourself? Are we talking microscopic? 300ft tall? What are we looking at here? What have you tried? Because if you haven't actually tried that skill yet, I'd love to see the test run on something like that--it's like Honey, I shrunk the Admiral. Does your strength stay the same or is it proportional to your size? Do your clothes grow and shrink with you? Are you more breakable when small or less breakable when large--is that, like strength, proportional to your scale?

[dendarii]

[ People should be less perverted, jeez. Miles just frowns at the barrage of questions and waves most of them off. ]

I don't know the answer to any of that - except clothing, yes I keep those. Thank god. Don't hold onto me while I'm trying it unless you want to come with me. Otherwise ... I haven't really tested it.

[ Though he winces just envisioning the amount of pain he'd be in if he even tried approaching 300 feet. 6 is bad enough, and that's a normal height. He'd have better luck going microscopic. That ... is not in the slightest bit comforting. ]

[driftsintobuffetline]

So you can make people grow or shrink with you? Is that what you're saying? Dude, I NEED to see this. Holy crap, this sounds awesome. And you 100% have to test your powers. I mean, I've tested my powers, Hermann's tested his... You've got to try so you know what you've got at your disposal! I can devise some tests for you to attempt and I'll be back stateside soon, if you want me to observe.