text

[calloused]

[ introductions are for losers, so Derek doesn't include one. just gets right down to what he wants. ]

Started a business. Hiring people. Tell me if you need a job.
Full time or part time positions available. Branches are located in Heropa or Maurtia Falls. Be nearby, or at least willing to travel.

Requirements:
- Unaffected by blood, bones, etcetera.
- Capable of dealing with emotional turmoil.
- Stamina in spades.
- Likes animals.
- Not an asshole.

That's it.

[ that's it. no further explanation. no sympathy for anyone dealing with roomba drama. zero shame ]

Comments

[bragnificent]

yeah really
i bet you cant even come up w/ 3 reasons to back that up

[ Why is there no one he could even @ right now that would support him on this... ]

[fehus]

i could but they're all kind of rude.

[bragnificent]

ok fuck you, im lowkey as hell

[fehus]

"ok fuck you, im lowkey as hell"

[bragnificent]

now i remember why i didnt like you

[fehus]

why am i watching your dog?

[fehus]

"didn't" is kind of exciting as a past tense? pointing that out is probably pushing it tho huh.

[bragnificent]

1. bcuz like it does many ppl, the thought of doing me a favor thrills you
2.

[fehus]

1. wrong. just straight up laughably wrong?
2. ?

[bragnificent]

1. then i give up, why are you watching my dog
2. i changed my mind
*dont

[fehus]

noo. i like moose and you. stop penalizing me for it.

[bragnificent]

well fine if ur gonna be all needy about it

[fehus]

unbelievable

[bragnificent]

i dont have to pay you do i

[fehus]

moose can pay me in blackmail.

[bragnificent]

uh
no thats ok
i think id rather pay you the cash

[fehus]

i'm kidding. you wanna know moose's secrets about you? he secrectly thinks you're the best and that he loves you very much. also none of that is a secret and he wants everyone to know. dogs are basically like that.

[bragnificent]

i mean theres not like anything to tell

[ Maybe just who all goes in and out of Reggie's apartment, or how often he jerks off-- but that one isn't exactly secret information anyway. ]

:)
knew it

[fehus]

was it the licks to the face that gave it away? or the fact that he follows you around with a big grin?

[bragnificent]

and also i'm very lovable

[fehus]

sure

[bragnificent]

i think you mean "agreed"

[fehus]

sure

[bragnificent]

oh blow me

[fehus]

lol