text

[calloused]

[ introductions are for losers, so Derek doesn't include one. just gets right down to what he wants. ]

Started a business. Hiring people. Tell me if you need a job.
Full time or part time positions available. Branches are located in Heropa or Maurtia Falls. Be nearby, or at least willing to travel.

Requirements:
- Unaffected by blood, bones, etcetera.
- Capable of dealing with emotional turmoil.
- Stamina in spades.
- Likes animals.
- Not an asshole.

That's it.

[ that's it. no further explanation. no sympathy for anyone dealing with roomba drama. zero shame ]

Comments

text; un: Ash Starmer | Green Newman

[subroutined]

...Exactly what sort of business is this?

[calloused]

One that pays.

Additional requirement for interested applicants: ask less questions than this guy.

[subroutined]

Oh, no. I already have a job. I'm just curious, as you didn't say what sort of work you'll be having people do.

Most applicants want to know what they're getting into.

text

[fehus]

you can't just tell assholes they can't apply. that's workplace discrimination.

text

[bragnificent]

right? im totally feeling profiled rn

Re: text

[fehus]

i know a lawyer. actually i know like three lawyers? why are there so many lawyers?

text

[fehus]

what's the job, weirdo? this is like a greg's list ad that just says "for sale."

[calloused]

It's a job that pays money.

I don't know why people keep pressing me on this. Work is work.
Stop making it weird.

[fehus]

you're the one making it weird. and you can't just throw around "be good with bones and guts" and "emotional turmoil" and then not expect questions.

[calloused]

[ don't hm him. ]

Most people who get a job here are just going to be picking up dog shit and sweeping shedded fur into garbage bags.
Don't need experience for that.

text;

[crassidy]

this aint creepy at all. well done m8

Re: text;

[fehus]

right? the only worse thing would be like, "looking 4 raw blood leave details within."

[quickfingers]

deputy rooty needs to do her press tour
lmk if she can stop by, new businesses in the falls are something we wanna look into supporting

[Or well, Peter does. He should see what Logan's plans are, too.]

she's got a special pawsitivity grant that I just made up
that she could bestow upon you if you say please & thanx
but she needs the PR so i'm srs bout he pres tour

[calloused]

... OK.

[ He didn't think he'd grab the attention of The Dog Mayor herself. He's not really sure how he feels right now. Starstruck? No, that's not it. Worried about relying on a pomeranian and a guy who looks uncomfortably familiar to help finance his new business? Hm. ]

A grant would be helpful, actually. Stopping by on her press tour could drum up business for us, which [ while terrible due to how much he hates people and doesn't want to be around them, ] could be something we need.
There has to be a form I need to sign here. Some kind of paperwork beyond a verbal "please & thanx".

text

[choosetruth]

[Wow, that's certainly a job listing. Georgia does want a new job, but she 100% isn't qualified for this one.

Still, she wouldn't be much of a journalist if she didn't at least inquire. Blood, bones, et cetera. Yikes.]

Getting a lot of takers?

[calloused]

One.

[ surprise! his tactic of being vague and slightly creepy hasn't worked well for him. not that he's willing to say as much. ]

Interested?

text

[ghoulking]

It would be helpful to explain what the job is.

[calloused]

Weeding out people who won't be able to handle the job is important, though.
There's no point in saying what it is to someone who won't want to deal with the bad stuff.

[youresovein]

How negotiable is the last requirement?

[calloused]

Inflexibly rigid.

Well, as long as you aren't an asshole to me, I mean.

text

[k31rfree]

[K31 is good at not asking questions.]

Are you still seeking assistance?

I have been working with animals since I arrived last month. I rather enjoy it. [That, and she lives on a freaking farm. There are too many animals around for their own good.]

[calloused]

Really?

[ he likes this girl. straightforward, offering her help without making a big deal of the way derek asked for it - he could absolutely consider hiring her, if she's still willing to apply once she knows the deal. ]

Yes. I'm still hiring.
It's a clinic, and a shelter - we help animals. Fix up people's pets, adopt out strays. Sell supplies. Things like that.
Where are you hired now?

text

[h2no]

are the blood and bones... of the animals???