maskormenace | 2nd 💀 Video; Backdated to 7/4

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2nd 💀 Video; Backdated to 7/4

[When the video clicks on, the viewers are greeted with several faces in a shady area—or maybe it's just not particularly sunny despite being mid-afternoon. Either way, two of those faces most will be familiar with, but especially one in particular: Darin's. Though, his is bloodied and bruised, as if someone wailed on him with their fists. Actually, it looks like that's exactly what happened. He's also notably unconscious—his head being held up by Guzma (the other familiar face), whose fist is full of Darin's hair to do so. He also looks pretty damn smug—if not downright delighted—to a degree that's a little worrying.

The others in view are decidedly less human. In fact, they aren't at all—above Darin hangs a red and black spider, staring at the camera with large purple eyes full of interest and curiosity towards it. He seems to be keeping himself up on what looks like thick webbing that's hanging down from somewhere and connects to Darin... because Darin has been wrapped up in web. A partial cocoon covering his torso and arms. Curiously, there's blood on Darin beyond his busted face—soaking through the webbing that's around him. Awesome!

Next is a moth-like Pokémon, who seems fit to hide most of his body behind that arm of Guzma's that's holding Darin's head up. His little face peeking up over it to look into the camera as well. To the right of him is a hulking bug that looks similar to an isopod if it was on roids. He's got weird cross shaped white pupils, and unlike the other two who seem both interested and excited to be on camera, he holds himself far more reserved and stoic. More like a threatening backdrop to the whole thing.

The last member of this shitty sadistic selfie is a brown beetle-like monster the size of a child, who stands directly besides Darin. His eyes are wide and intense, almost hostile, as he stares at the camera. This hostility is only further emphasized by the obvious blood on the spikes of his pincers.

...And then a second later Pinsir fucking dabs, without breaking eye contact with the camera. As if the idiot bug even knows what the gesture means, but he's seen people do it, and they were on camera too! It makes sense to him. Guzma doesn't seem to mind. He doesn't comment on it, he might not have even noticed, honestly.

He's got more important matters to address:]

Listen up, idiots! It's ya boy again, and I'm here with a special message, a PSA, of sorts, yo.

[He glances to Darin, who is still very much so knocked out, before looking back into the feed. That sinister smirk still on his face.]

Just in case any of you rotten upstarts was under the absurd impression that big bad Guzma was a dude to cross, take it from poor Darin here: I ain't. You mess with me, and I'll crush you, just like I did him.

[As Guzma talks, he's swaying Darin's head side to side by the hold he has on his hair.]

This idiot thought he could stand up to me, that he could beat me down. Hell, in some warped sense of heroic idiocy, he even thought he could help me, HA! Some stupid soft shit like that—and where did it get him!? [Guzma lets go of his hair, letting Darin's head fall emphatically into a hanging position.] No where good, I can tell ya that much.

Your boy still stands, but this loser sure ain't, huh?

[Guzma gives Darin a good little spin as he walks away from the scene with the camera still pointed at himself. The spin, and the more Darin comes into view it's clear he's being suspended by that web that's wrapped around him. However, with that little crowd taking up less of the background, viewers can get more of an idea of where this little broadcast is happening: in an alleyway. Somewhere.

Super helpful!]

Consider this fair warning, y'all. I won't be handing out another.

[He lowers the communicator, making the camera view him from below as he's about to cut the feed, his hand hovering as he stares down at it for a moment as something occurs to him:]

—Oh, yeah. Those of you who give a damn and wanna clean that mess up, [he gestures over his shoulder towards Darin with his thumb, even though he's currently blocking the view of him,] he's in Maurtia Falls. Somewhere on the east side. Never been too good at giving directions, but I'm sure you hero-types can figure it out.

Later days, y'all!

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You’re the one provoking people into beating you up, not me. I’ve got enough self-respect, thanks. I just want to get my friend some help.

[A sigh.]

What if I told you I wanted to land a solid punch on you? Would that get me Darin’s location? [Molly isn’t actually planning on it, he’s already seen the video and he doesn’t have the Mighty Nein as backup, but—well. If it gets him an in he’ll use it, guy seems to be spoiling for a fight. He’ll just cast a Charm Person on him, no big deal.]

I'd say you're full of shit, but I can respect the effort.

[It looks like Guzma's started walking again, and the shade from the buildings is gone—looks like he's out of the alleyway now, but there's not much to go off of yet.]

You really care about that idiot, huh? Did he get to you with one of his dumb speeches about friendship, or something?

Well, it was worth a shot.

[Gods dammit, show him some fucking names.]

Close. I started it, actually, I liked his work. And he’s been a good friend, so, yes, I do care about him, and I’d like to pick him up now to get him back on his feet. Quite a few people care about him, you’ll find, so if you wanted a fight, congratulations. They’ll be kicking down your door baying for your blood. [Not Molly, though. He really just wants to get his friend somewhere safe and teeming with doctors and healers and medicine.]

And you’ve already got what you wanted—proved yourself the biggest, meanest motherfucker around, beaten someone up, ensured you wouldn’t be bored for the next few days. Surely that’s enough.

[Guzma listens, but it doesn't seem to move him or anything. Especially not the view of the camera.]

Oh? You think I'm satisfied, and so you're owed similar satisfaction? Is that it? Least you seem to get it—my message. Better than he did.

[He chuckles a bit, looking past the camera at something, like he's maybe taking in his surroundings, looking at the signs, the landmarks...]

Ain't nothin' keeping me from disconnecting right now. Leaving you in the dark—and Darin up shit creek without a paddle. But that's what happens when you jump into the deep end without thinking, huh?

Your message is some attention-seeking shite, but apparently it’s worked, so. Fair’s fair. [A shrug.] I don’t actually care about it. Again, all I want is Darin.

[And if he has to actually fight Guzma and, he figures, all those animals to get there, then he’ll do it. Not happily, but he will.]

No, nothing’s keeping you. [And Molly tilts his head to the side. There’s the soft jingle of jewelry.] But if you disconnect from me now, I wouldn’t be able to track you down and give you exactly what you deserve. And honestly—I think you want a fight. That’s what this is about, right? This whole show’s just ‘cause you want more people to come beat you up, because you want to really prove you’ve got the biggest dick around.

After all, what would you do if everyone was so desensitized that they saw your show and told you that they’d seen and done far worse? What would you do if they told you that you were small potatoes? After all, you’re not the one who took over the moon.

I already got a few fights lined up as we speak. So your fronting ain't measuring up to what you're hoping it will.

[Catra, Lance, that Allura woman...]

And for the record, ain't no one gonna beat me up. I'll smash every single worthless punk who tries to take me on! I'm big bad Guzma, and I ain't never gonna be beat down!

[He blatantly ignores the question, though. He heard about the moon business, and while that's a bit more than he'd care to do, he can't argue it wasn't an impressive feat of nastiness!

Besides, considering the response he's gotten, it's clear that beyond people's posturing, they're taking him pretty damn seriously. Sweet, sweet validation.]

My fronting's great, is it my fault you've got everyone on your ass?

[They'd better all team up. Molly would feel way better if everyone gunning for Guzma teamed up because it's clear to him that Guzma knows how to use numbers to his advantage.]

Because you'll sic your animals on them, is that it? Big bad Guzma, hiding behind his bigger, badder monsters like they're his mom's skirts? [Molly tilts his head, and smiles, with teeth. He's trying to goad him, at this point, because Molly's petty and angry and if he can't hit something till it bleeds then he'll settle for getting them angry at him.] Oh, I won't deny they pack a mean punch. Might be you do too, but I doubt it's that mean. Are you going to do the smashing, or do you need their help to take down one person who's holding back?

It's your fault for not making yourself a more interesting opponent.

[Unfortunately this type of goading doesn't affect Guzma all that much. Where he's from the power of the person is measured by their Pokémon, so it's like mocking Superman for hiding behind his super strength. It just doesn't really make sense to him as an insult.

Particularly when he's a skilled and powerful trainer back home. He is someone people actively fear.]

They ain't animals, they're Pokémon, idiot. If you're gonna try to insult me, at least know what the fuck you're talking about. Besides, if you ain't willing to understand the culture where I come from enough to insult me properly, ya may as well stop before you make yourself look even worse.

You can't shame a man over the very thing he's proud of.

Your loss.

[Well, you learn something everyday, he supposes. Molly doesn't rise to that bait, but there's a flash of amusement across his face.]

I don't know anything! It's part of my charm. [He is very much content in letting other people be smarter than he is.] Besides, have you noticed we're not on your world? Your culture here has, what, four or five people? Maybe six if we're really stretching it.

And maybe I can't shame you over what you're proud of, but I can point out that you're on a world where not many other people have—Poh-keh-mon, or whatever. Bit of an unfair advantage, right from the start. But then again that's something else you're proud of, isn't it? Grab every advantage you have, from the Poh-keh-mon to your appearance to everything else, so everyone gets too angry to notice you're just all flash. No real bang.

Hell, if it wasn't for the lack of explosions this week, you'd just be some common thug who beat somebody up in an alleyway and made it a forgettable show.

[Guzma just. Laughs. Loud and hearty.]

Yeah? I ain't expecting this world to be like my own, just saying your insults aren't insults to someone like me. I don't live by your standard, and I won't be insulted by that fact. Come up with better material, yo.

[But he shrugs.]

Advantage is advantage, everyone's got their own, that's just how life works. It's all about utilizing what you got—'cos your opponent will do the same. Fairness ain't real.

You can talk smack all you want, but ultimately others and even yourself are proving you wrong. Sure, I didn't blow up a city or nothin', but I sure as shit got under people's skin. And that? That was the plan.

A win, in my book.

Have you had any luck finding him? If not, I propose we team up. I've got decent first aid skills an can communicate with animals, but there's no way I'd be able to carry him to a hospital or anything.

Nope. I’m trying to goad the big guy, but I’ve got a feeling it’s not going to work, so—please do.

I'll meet you at.... [ There's a pause and a few taps. ] Easter ave and Red Rd? Am I reading this right?

There's a music store called Lyle's Lyrics. Somewhere around there. [ there's a mutter about topography maps being way easier to read. ] I'm already on my way there.

I know that. I know someone who works there. [And shows up at the Medieval Festival on weekends to play the fiddle.] I'll meet you there.

[ Ruby is there fairly quickly, and she's not there alone. Lining the roofs, street signs, power lines, and anything else that would hold them were pigeons. Every pigeon she could convince to come with her on her way there. She looks completely unbothered by just about anything right now, being very much in 'mission' mode. ]

[Molly takes like twenty minutes to get there, and he looks pretty tired when he does, tail drooping, tugging his coat around himself like he's trying to ward off a cold that doesn't exist.]

So, good news, someone found him and sent an ambulance. [A beat. He looks up at the pigeons.]

...hypothetical question, but could you talk these birds into shitting on someone?

Hypothetically? Oh yes. Yes I could. [ That unbothered face quickly turns into a grin. ]

Edited 2019-07-09 10:28 (UTC)

Good. Could you talk them into dumping a load on someone who might be blustering around with a few very unique, what'd he call them, Poh-kay-mon? White hair, goggles, walking around like he's a bit too big for his britches.

Poh-keh-mon, I think. But yeah. Just gimme a sec.

[ She pulls out her comm and starts going through the network. She play's Guzma's video without the sound, taking a few pics. She then edits the pics to all be one image, and before long, well, she's on the ground surrounded by pigeons.

The pigeons look over the image, five or six pigeons at a time, examining it as if committing to memory, and before long those that have seen the photos start flying off.

Ruby hums to herself, pretty pleased. ]

It's a standing suggestion. I couldn't really explain why they should take a crap on him whenever they can, but I greatly encouraged it. He may not have flocks going at him at once, but he's going to be grateful his hair is already white if these little guys keep up the good work.

[wryly:] In my world we'd just call them animals at best and be done with it.

[All these fancy shmancy names are gonna drive Molly up the wall. He can only care about so much.]

Remind me to be much nicer to pigeons from here on out. [This he says while watching them fly off, his tail swaying steadily back and forth.] I don't need flocks of them shitting on him, I just need a little light, public humiliation.

[ Ruby just grins a little. ] Just don't feed them things that will poison them, or try to kill them for fun, and you'll be good. [ She reaches down and pets a pigeon that has been trying to get her attention. ] They're good birds, really. A lot smarter than anyone gives them credit for - like most animals really.

[ She looks back up to him. ] Oh, they won't likely be flocking. A lot of these pigeons were parts of different flocks. [ Her smile then turns sinister. ] That makes it even better because he'll never have any clue which pigeon is going to take a dump on him. And they'll probably remember for a couple months. I figure having to wear a hat or put his hoodie up will save him, but I'm not sure he'll catch that for a while.

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2nd 💀 Video; Backdated to 7/4

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