maskormenace | video.

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Sooooo...

Here's a question. What's the weirdest thing one of your fans has ever done? Or, like, the weirdest piece of content you've ever found?

Because I just found there are bwitter accounts dedicated to trying to prove I'm not actually dating my girlfriend? I thought it was a joke but they're in like, a flame war with someone whose really into it... Like, I know I shouldn't be reading it, but I just can't look away.

[ oh, right, wait, also need to be responsible. ]

Oh, right, almost forgot. Hi, I'm Josh Foley. I work at De Chima General. If you've got weird medical needs or something you need fixed, I'm your dude.

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Somebody started a PlzFundMe page to get me a dinosaur because I said I wanted one. I guess that's weird, but I think they meant it nicely? [He is smol, his grasp on the internet and the idea of fans isn't the best yet.] I'm gonna name the dinosaur Clawdio al-Jameel if I get him. It's a good name.

Can you make my powers stop going off when I touch people? [Does that count as a medical need?]

A dinosaur seems like a really big responsibility.

[ pls small child... don't get a pet that can eat you. he's seen some shit. ]

Um... Maybe? It depends on, uh, the hows and whys. My friend might be able to help you.

I know, but I'll take care of it! I promise. Pets are family and family means love. Ummi taught me that.

[He's hyped, because he's too young to realize how badly this might go.]

I see people's deaths when I touch them. I have to wear gloves all the time now that I'm a Seer. It's itchy and sweaty and I don't like it. [Help.]

Right, but maybe make sure you get a little one with not a lot of teeth or something. I don't wanna see you in my ER because your friend got too excited and nipped you.

[ welp. that's a terrible power for a sweet kid. ]

Well, uh... I don't know if I can help with that. [ given that he hasn't totally figured out how to turn off his own bio-senses, which like, can really fuck up a nice outing. ] But my friend David's an inventor. He might be able to help you out.

I would still love him even if he bit me. That's what love is.

[Missing the point is his other superpower, clearly.]

Oh, I know David! We had a sleepover. He got me gloves and we played checkers, and he likes dinosaurs, too. [Ten out of ten, great guy.] He said fur-bearing trout aren't real, though, and that's sad. Do you think if I ask the internet, they'll get me a trout with fur? I want one as a pet.

No, no definitely not. Once something takes off a finger you shouldn't still be best buddies with it.

[ things to tease david about later. ]

Uh... A furry trout? Is that, like, a thing where you're from?

This is why the internet isn't trying to buy you a pet.

[Nashir would absolutely keep a pet that bit him. He's that kind of kid.]

Maybe! I've heard different things. But I want one even if it's not a thing in some worlds. Fur-bearing trouts sound like they'd be good pets.

The internet isn't trying to buy me a pet because I'm not responsible enough for a pet.

[ which is probably a terrible thing coming from a doctor. ]

Really? They just sound like they'd, uh... smell.

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