Video; forward dated to the 6th

[angelfire]

[ Okay, he's bored. Where are the tumbling heroics? Where's the challenge? Lucifer is here - back - whatever, taking time out from recording his show to hang out on the network with you fascinating examples of God's greatest mistakes. He sets up his camera, which shows off the back of a chair that reads 'Lucifer' in broad black writing. The background is a handsome looking church, with stained glass windows, long red carpets, and hanging red drapes that tumble down the broad pillars. Huge bouquets of summer flowers decorate the altars and tumble out of the planters beside the pews, and light pours in through the round feature window. For once, Lucifer - when he takes his seat - is groomed, dressed in a neat black on black suit, and finished with silver fish shaped cufflinks and everything. He looked the part of the villain, the businessman; the schemer. A charismatic cult leader. Or well...like a guy in a sharp suit. He counted off on his fingers: ]

Pestilence. War. Famine. [ And he touched his fourth finger, then looked puzzled at the camera. ] Well, would you look at that. Four horsemen, not three. No prizes to anyone who guesses the last one.

[ He reaches into his breast pocket, removing a simple silver ring very carefully, propped it on his thumbnail and then flicked it. Flicked Death's ring clean into the air, then snatched his hand up and caught it. ] One left.

[ He leaned very slightly forward, speaking as though he were sharing a secret. ] Don't worry your head about it, my darling. I wouldn't dream of giving this thing to just anyone, but its multiversal owner really will have to come fetch it back before I'm tempted. To do what? Who knows? I'm mercurial like that. Sammmmy, come on out to play. It's been forever.

[ Lucifer's attention was broken by his accepting a clipboard and signing off on something on it. ] Chicken soup again? [ A nod from the assistant. ] Good. It's wonderful for the soul.

[ And then he's left to continue with his video, and he rolls his eyes pointedly. ] The fault really lies with you, kiddos. All that anger and repression, it'll mess you right up. But for the sake of argument, I think it's fair to say 'I predict a riot'. Accurate? Why don't we talk it out, hm?

Comments

[angelfire]

Who said anything about the poor? The poor can dine like kings if they commit themselves to it.
Besides, it's really just a metaphor.

[infomodder]

Commit themselves to envy?

[don't talk to him about metaphors unless you want to hear some of the strangest, most chopped up metaphors out there, the sort that fall apart five seconds after they're made

it's really disastrous and nobody called him out on it until he got here and then it burned his bottom a little

more like a lot, actually, he was devastated

perhaps he's feeling a bit of envy]

[angelfire]

It must be envy to summon the energy and time for commitment. The rich work hardly at all while the poor struggle dawn until dusk for a scrap of the same wealth.
But not all wealth is about money.
Are you wealthy, William?

[infomodder]

I get by.
And my name is Will.

[angelfire]

Will, then.
How do you sleep, Will? Do you dream much?

[infomodder]

[geT OUT HANNIBAL]

Thank you.
Same as anyone else. I didn't get hit by the slumber plague, if that's what you're asking.

[angelfire]

That's a shame. It was very beautiful.
I only participated as a voyeur, I'm afraid. I think I'd have liked to have seen your dreams.
Assuming they weren't all about fishing.

[infomodder]

Not for those of us who had to tend to them.
And I'm sorry to disappoint, Lucifer, but all I ever dream about is fishing.

[He's not sorry at all, he just wondered if he could type that with a straight face (or at all). The other part isn't actually a lie...when one considers fishing a way of life and something that can be applied to every aspect of it instead of simply the rod, the reel, the fish, the water, it's apt. He dreams about fishing for fish as much as he dreams about issues that arise with fishing for serial killers. Fishing for men is still fishing.]

[angelfire]

You're right, that is disappointing to hear.
Far too sporting. I prefer the way dolphins do it.

[infomodder]

Altruistic dolphins or murderous dolphins?

[angelfire]

Same thing.
They make a net of bubbles, driving the fish into shallower water, and then the pod divides into two. One group circle the fish below, maintaining their net, terrifying the fish so that they bunch together protectively, while the other group swim through the shoal gorging themselves.
The fish don't have a chance.

[infomodder]

[Have you heard of Jonathan Crane, Lucifer, he also likes the fear option.]

Right.
More sensible than expecting you to opt for even the barest mercy shown by shooting fish in a barrel, I suppose.

[angelfire]

Not me. I'm just saying that given the choice I'd take clever premeditation over thuggish thumping on each other for entertainment.

[infomodder]

Is it really so clever when it relies on several members to act their parts out, and if any of them do something different or fail in their duties, the whole thing can be for naught?
Seems less than clever to premeditate when all that planning could easily be lost by one party deciding they'd rather not when it comes down to the wire.

[Hmm, hmm, and the profile grows. Is Lucifer a social creature, or is he the sort who thinks he knows exactly how any given person will react and uses it in his favor? Not that those two are exclusive. One can crave the power of control over another's actions while still needing them. Even if the relationship isn't a positive one, it's still a type of social attention. Those master manipulators wouldn't be a Goddamn thing without the people they manipulate, after all. They might delude themselves into believing otherwise, but that doesn't change anything.]

[angelfire]

There's a reason you're called homo sapiens not homo thump everything and hope for the best. A wise predator allows for opportunity rather than depending on it; those that depend on chance and luck perish.

You're right that a dissenting group will end in the destruction of all. Perhaps, then, the apex predator is the one who can negotiate those tribes, take what he wants, even at the expense of others, and moves on. But that's premeditation too, isn't it?

[ Are you psychoanalyzing him, Will? ]

[infomodder]

No. That's cruelty for cruelty's sake.

Premeditation would be a way to phrase it so this hypothetical apex predator feels smarter and better about what they actually are.

[Damn right. He can't turn it off, okay?]

[angelfire]

What you call cruelty, I call survival of the fittest.

Are you a lone wolf, Will, or a member of a pack?

[infomodder]

Among animals, perhaps. Not the same with homo sapiens.

[Is this how a normal conversation with Lucifer goes? He can dig these questions better than "What's your favorite color?" or "If you could take five things to an island, what would they be?" Not that he finds this sort of question palatable, not at all, but it's at least a bit more interesting.]

Little of column A, little of column B. And yourself?

[Quid pro quo.]

[angelfire]

Wolves are more pagan symbols than Christian ones. Fenrir, for example. Of course my brother never had any children, serpent or otherwise, but these things will get mixed up.

[ Is he deliberately avoiding the answer or building up to it? ]

But a pride of lions isn't much unlike a pack of wolves. There's the alpha, Himself in this case, and his firstborn sons, my brothers and I. To answer your question, I suppose lone wolf originally by necessity, but I've discovered since then that I don't play well with others.

[ Although what he's implying was obvious even before the question came up, which is that if he could have ruled heaven and called all the shots, he'd have been all about the pack. ]

[infomodder]

A culling of the herd is sometimes necessary.

[Will's not going to make a jab about that's sometimes also considered a sort of survival of the fittest, and does Lucifer think that only applies when he is the one who picks those put in exile and left to fend for themselves? Does it only become a problem when the same sort of treatment is used against him? That's a bit rude...and rather revealing because yeah, he's still analyzing. Leaky faucet that can't be fixed, him and analyzing.]

We all react to betrayal differently.

[Much less rude.]

[angelfire]

Betrayal is one thing. But ultimately betrayal, war, and my Fall was my Father's Vision; His Design.

[infomodder]

[s q u i n t]

Of course it was. Bible talks about how He's everywhere all at once, past future and present. He knew what He was doing. He knows us before we're formed and all that.
I've always been curious how Adam and Eve can be blamed when their fates were already scripted, so to speak.

[angelfire]

And my role in her corruption--preordained. Which means conceivably it was the point all along to make me the bad guy, and provide a Hell with which to contrast Heaven.

So it's ultimately God's fault.

[infomodder]

[A five minute delay and then...this rudeness. Sorry, God.]

So organized religions based around this particular God are nothing but a convoluted type of Stockholm Syndrome?

[angelfire]

I'd say that's a fair assessment. But what else have you got going for you, after all?