2nd Illusion ♦ Text; ID reads Kaito Kuroba

[tuxedo_magician]

So.

I don't know who here knew Heiji Hattori, but he's gone. Ported out. Whatever it's called. He left some stuff behind, so there's that.

And I think I'm gonna have to look into finding a new place to live. The guy left me all his pets and I don't think there's enough room for all of them, me and my doves and my roommates. Does anyone know how to teach a cat to ignore the birds?

[Of course, this is text. Because Kaito is too damn tired to deal with Poker Face at the moment and he knows he'd have to use it if this was voice or video.

Dammit. Of course he was the only one left.]

Comments

[ text ]

[disorder_heaven]

Iiiiiiiiiii

dunno. Don't think so. I have problems with certain things but nothing I take like food or medicine.

[ text ]

[tuxedo_magician]

Certain things? Like what?

I mean, if you want to tell me. Don't want to do something that'll make your sick or something, you know?

[ text ]

[disorder_heaven]

Uh, dust. Cats. Certain kinds of metals. No food, though, that I know of.

[ text ]

[tuxedo_magician]

Good. Less things to worry about then.

[ text ]

[disorder_heaven]

I guess. But thanks for caring, I think.

[ text ]

[tuxedo_magician]

You're my roommate! Why wouldn't I care?

[ text ]

[disorder_heaven]

Idk, we barely know each other? I have coworkers back home I've known for like two hundred years and they wouldn't care if I died.

[ text ]

[tuxedo_magician]

[He lets the whole 'two hundred years' comment slide for the moment. Hell, he dresses up in a white tuxedo and a top hat looking for a stone that supposedly grants immortality, so...]

Well, I'm not them. Besides, just because we barely know each other doesn't mean that I would want you to die or something. That's just horrible.

[ voice ]

[disorder_heaven]

[ He COULD just be exaggerating, I mean, he IS eighteen years old, right? ...Right?! ]

That's good, at least. I'm kinda tired of people who want to kill me coming over all the time. But you're moving out, so that kinda spoils the "having a decent housemate" vibe.

[text]

[tuxedo_magician]

Even if I do move out, that doesn't mean we still wouldn't be friends or something.

That's not how this friend thing works.

[ voice ]

[disorder_heaven]

Yeah, remember that bit about "people wanting to kill me" all the time?

That applies to most'a my friends, too. So yeah. Forgive me for not knowing that's not normal.

[text]

[tuxedo_magician]

Okay, wow.

Then I'll teach you how this thing works.

And dude, where did you meet these guys?

[ voice ]

[disorder_heaven]

Hell, mostly.

...Teach me how what works?

[text]

[tuxedo_magician]

You know, this friendship thing.

... are we talking Hell as in "well, this place sucks" or Hell as in you know, fire and brimstone?

[ voice ]

[disorder_heaven]

Oh, the friendship thing. I've heard it's magic. [ A beat. ] Do you get people from Hell here a lot or something?

[text]

[tuxedo_magician]

It can be!

[So says the magician.]

Not literal Hell, I don't think. I've heard people use the phrase 'stuck in hell' when referring to places like work or school though.

[ voice ]

[disorder_heaven]

That seems dramatic.

[text]

[tuxedo_magician]

Probably depends on the school I guess.

[ voice ]

[disorder_heaven]

Still seems dramatic.

[ voice ]

[tuxedo_magician]

Well, I'm a magician, so dramatic is sort of my thing.