maskormenace

I think being friends with about forty thousand people warrants a network announcement. If any of you know Jaime Reyes, he's been Ported out.

Pretty smart guy told me that three months is a good amount of time to wait before assuming someone's not coming back with their memories, SO. I had a good idea of what we can do to make this a little happier, which is probably what he'd prefer anyhow. 'Cause he's a hippie.

Anybody interested, share a story about Jaime! Funny, nice, interesting- anything's fine so long as it's not depressing. Or if you don't have a story, maybe something you like about him or you could leave a message of something that you'd like to say to him. Maybe we can show him this if he gets back. Make him cry, so I can get blackmail pictures.

[A heavy pause.] Iiii don't want to make this sound like a eulogy or anything. Especially if he DOES come back, because then I'll look really stupid. But he's not from my world, so. You all know how that goes.

Jaime is...a seriously good guy. He's really a great- He's a great person. So. If you DON'T know that loser, definitely read around to what people have to say. You'll probably want to get to know him when you're done.

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Honestly, it was a bag of airplane bottles. I assume that someone foisted them off on him and he then in turn foisted them off on me.

Oh my god did he really. Just a ziploc bag full of tiny liquor bottles? I cannot believe that supreme nerd- Did he just kind of show up and go 'here' or did he make a big deal out of it?

More of the former than the latter. I also tried to force one or two of them on him but alas, my attempts were brushed off.

Oh man, of course they were. He pretends like he's not but he's straight as an arrow. [It was probably a lot of Khaji yelling DO YOU KNOW HOW UNHEALTHY ALCOHOLISM IS in his ear as well, but.] Maybe he's some kind of courier for other people's unwanted stashes. Like a drug mule for junk.

At the risk of sounding old, what kind of stashes are you talking about?

[ because Dorian "bad decisions" Gray is totally thinking weed. or cocaine. and how old are these kids again??? ]

Oh, well. You know, like LSD and meth. Prescription pain killers, nothing big.

[ okay, so that's a joke, Dorian's got this. ]

Dammit, he's been holding out on the good stuff!

Let's be real, he's probably giving it to orphans or something. Helping to encourage entrepreneurship.

Edited 2015-12-03 18:14 (UTC)

I'm sure that running a small dope ring technically counts as small business ownership.

Dude no I read this research paper where this guy hung out with gangs in like Detroit or something and studied how they did business. They keep ledgers and crap. It's practically corporate!

You read a research paper. Sure.

Man, you think any gangs in Detroit will let ME near their place of business? Look at me. I'm so homegrown you could sell me at a farmer's market.

Then find your right clientele! That's the first step to being a drug dealer, find a market that you'll fit in with. Gangs in Detroit, maybe not, but rich high schoolers who have a loose bank account and even looser morals? Start there.

[ Dorian...is totally talking from experience. ]

[this is becoming less joke as it continues]

Uhhh. Okay? I had no idea kids in private schools were where it's at.

How the heck do you know that?

[ paaaaaaaaaaaause ]

How do you know Jaime again?

[ look at that, that's a totally brilliant way to change the conversation and not at all blatant as hell. ]

Oh my god, you're totally a rich-kid drug dealer, aren't you?! Jesus! You rob banks and you sling crack! I cannot believe Jaime's friend's with you!

I robbed one bank. It doesn't count if it's just one bank!

[ to Dorian's credit, he's not saying "well I only sold coke back HOME" because he figures that's a bit more damning in the Jaime Reyes code of honor than robbing a bank. ]

Besides, you stopped us, you really saw just how pathetic Shade and I were. [ no. how pathetic Dorian was. ]

No Shade was skilled because he's been doing this a trillion years. [and wally is not happy about that so thanks for bringing it up] And you're skipping over the part where you're selling drugs! To kids! I should be taking this conversation to the cops right n- In fact maybe I will, I'm gonna do that right now!

I'm not selling drugs to anybody. I'm simply making a generalization because I used to be the type of rich boy with too much money who would buy those drugs if offered.

[ he...still is a druggie rich kid, but this time with marginally less money ]

God you are so shifty. You know that, right? You are one of the shiftiest people I've ever met and I'm friends with actual professional criminals.

It's part of the Dorian Gray experience.

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