VIDEO

[smallmediumatlarge]

[When it comes on, the video is well-framed and perfectly focused on a small, pudgy boy with neatly coiffed white hair. He takes a moment to adjust his tie, then the little American flag pin on his lapel, and then finally looks up.]

Oh, my! Did this thing start up already? Silly me. Well, this isn't anything formal, anyhow! I just thought I'd introduce my little ol' self. Hello, America! I'm Gideon Gleeful, new in town, just here to help... Where I can, you know, I just do what I can. I'd be real grateful if any of y'all could give me a few tips! It's hard to know what's what with all these darn powers and politics. Awful complicated, real nasty situation. But, oh, don't get me wrong, I'm still pleased as punch to be here! Thanks for havin' me. Truly, I mean that.

Well, I won't waste any more of your time, I know we got some busy folks out there! But do get back to me, I'd love to get to know all y'all. Bye bye now!

[And with a wink and a wave, he reaches out and ends the feed.]

Comments

video;

[oldstandard]

KIDS, GET THE BROOM!

Or anyone! This is not restricted to the kids, just get a broom in my hands immediately.

[smallmediumatlarge]

Stanford Pines. I thought I might run into you here.

[ Video ]

[enucleation]

[ how do kids get to be this eloquent ]

Tips... if you have anything in particular you'd like to know, I can try to answer.

In any case, the first thing to know is that the government will give you the chance to register or not. if you do, you get to keep the house you were given for free and you are also given medical aid for free. If you decide not to register, you will have to support those expenses yourself.

[ he can't really say if it's the best to register or not. it depends on the point of view ]

[smallmediumatlarge]

[Sits up a little straighter, listening attentively. He's already registered—that was a no brainer—but this seems promising.]

What about you, are you registered? You think I should?

[Video]

[monge]

[Y'all? Y'all? Komasan knows that accent, it's the American equivalent to--]

Are you... Are you from the countryside, zura?!

[Nothing else matters. What is helping? He just doesn't know.]

[smallmediumatlarge]

What a cute little... thing! You know a lot of tricks, do ya?

video

[glitchinthesystem]

[ Well...isn't this kid overly cheerful. Glitch is not sure many kids would be okay with being kidnapped to an alternate dimension but, who knows? Maybe they're just too young to get it.

Still, young child in trouble is enough to set off the ringers in his mind to try and help.

Someone stop him before it's too late ]

Yeah, sure, kidlet. Do you have anything particular in mind or just a general overview of what's going on?

[smallmediumatlarge]

Oh, I'd love to hear your thoughts! Any thoughts at all.

Video

[crapbearer]

[ Oh dear god it's all of Max's least favorite cousins and classmates all rolled into one like some sort of Lovecraftian sycophant horror. What a freakin' suck-up.

Still, Max isn't one to straight-up reject anyone, and he extends a hand of friendship the best way he knows how. Who doesn't love a little banter, right? When he speaks, the tone is light and friendly. ]

Well, Elvis, if you want some tips, I could start with your wardrobe!

[ SAID THE GUY WITH HIS HAT ON SIDEWAYS. ]

[smallmediumatlarge]

[He's still smiling! Always smiling. Keep smiling, Gideon.]

Oh, I'm sorry, did the video cut out? It's Gideon. Glad to meet you, friend.

video

[justanotherlink]

...Aren't you supposed to be in jail?

[Pacifica is sitting somewhere with a cat in her lap, looking...confused? Unsettled? He was spying on everyone.]

PRIVATE VIDEO

[smallmediumatlarge]

[He just kicks his legs a little, still smiling.]

Prison, technically. But I think you'll find it was all just a little ol' misunderstanding. How are you, Pacifica? They treatin' you alright 'round here?

video

[glitterateur]

[Gideon. Mabel feels a whole lot of feelings when she sees his creepy widdle face on the network. Shock. Disgust. Dismay. The sadness that comes from the knowledge that in this universe she has spent more time in prison than the guy who tried to destroy her family using ancient evil and a giant robot.

There's no way he's not going to figure out she's here. Better it be on her own terms than something else-- plus Stan's already calling for a broom, so whatever. Thus Mabel decides to respond to his stupid video the most mature yet confrontational way she knows how:]

Boo! Booooo! Dumb video!

[smallmediumatlarge]

[He looks honestly happy to see her! So that's gross.]

Mabel! Sugar. How are you, how you been? Settlin' in alright?

video;

[ursawhiner]

And now Gideon's here too?? Man, this week is weird.

No one's going to fall for your act, by the way. We're way too used to supervillains.

[smallmediumatlarge]

Well, well. Lil Dipper Pines. Hello.

Action

[exceptfebruary]

[ Julian saw Gideon's post and mostly ignored it (he is not a friendly man) other than making a mental note of the date, since he likes to keep track of the exact date people were imported. When he leaves his room to actually feed himself, however, he runs into that same boy from the video.

There is a grown man with strange tattoos who is wearing cheap clothes, is barefoot, and is frowning at Gideon. He eyes that little American flag pin. ]

You should have arrived on the fifteenth.

[smallmediumatlarge]

[Gideon is taking a break from his video campaign to dig in the fridge, mumbling to himself.]

And there's no darn—oh! Howdy.

Action!

[flyfishing]

[Fly had gone out to prepare for the new roommate. Ever since Calendar Man started living here, he decided it was time to pay attention to who was moving in. For awhile there, it was mostly just him living in #001. But the rooms were filling up and it gave the fish boy new opportunities to make new super friends!]

[Unfortunately all he could do in preparation was buy some baseball stuff and pray the new person would be open to playing ball. He had no idea who they were or what they were like but maybe he'd luck out. If not, he could always bother Julie.]

[He returned home soon after and poked his head through the door, hoping the new person had already settled.]

Hello?

[smallmediumatlarge]

[Someone small is in the kitchen, digging through the fridge. If it's a burglar, they're not a very good one.]

Chunky peanut butter!? I'm livin' with heathens.

video;

[amadaman]

[There sure are some cheerful folks. Ken doesn't look nearly as crisp and clean as this guy with his messy brown, orange-tipped hair and too-large red hoodie, a dog rolling around on his lap.]

... You sound almost like a politician.

[Yes, Ken, because that's absolutely polite.]

Well, you're in the middle of a war, and the situation sucks. That's somewhere to start.

[smallmediumatlarge]

That's a hum-dinger of a "somewhere"! I'm sorry, I didn't catch your name.

video

[112ounces]

[ That has to be the weirdest person Carl has ever seen. And considering the life he has lived back home plus living here for a year, that's impressive.

Seeing kids acting like adults are just . . . off-putting. Especially little kids. ]

What kind of tips?

[smallmediumatlarge]

Oh, anything you got! I'm very open to advice.

video;

[hardcorduroy]

(how is it this twerp manages to get even folksier every time she sees him. she just squints at him at first, but eventually rolls her eyes.) Listen you twerp, you might have gotten a second chance helping us fight Bill. But if you so much as sneeze wrong, I'll gladly wear your butt as a tacky rhinestone slipper again. And drop the act, it's just degrading.

[smallmediumatlarge]

Wendy! It's a real pleasure. I don't think we've formally met.

voice;

[slightlyoffchilt]

You have attracted quite a significant amount of animosity already. [At least from those who seem to be familiar with the young lad.] Is that unusual for you?

[smallmediumatlarge]

The Pines and I have a complicated history. I'm afraid they went and took our friendly little rivalry to heart, bless 'em.

[video]

[timecapture]

[Well, she definitely overheard Stan. And Mabel. And Dipper. But she's still going to try, dammit.]

Hi. I'm Max. I'm a friend of Mabel and Dipper.

[Should she have said that? Probably not.]

[smallmediumatlarge]

Well, it's a pleasure.

video | id reads "karen starr"

[boobwindow]

[ Well, doesn't look like some people are going to roll out the red carpet for this kid. ]

What sort of tips are you looking for?

[smallmediumatlarge]

Any you can spare!

video;

[deciphered]

[He adjusts his glasses, and the look Gideon gets is just... confused.]

Usually this volume of screaming is reserved for something a little more... impressive.

[smallmediumatlarge]

[That face is familiar. AND YET]

I'm sorry, I don't think we've met.

video;

[subourbon]

[Alison is instantly charmed by the tiny, pudgy boy and this display of his polite demeanour and deferential spirit!]

Oh you poor thing, you must find this all so confusing! Any questions you have, you just ask away!

[smallmediumatlarge]

I appreciate that! From the bottom of my heart. I didn't catch your name, miss...?

private voice

[dreamshades]

[ Peter's getting vibes here. Through the convos he's flicking through and listening on.

Well, time to work on his hunch. ]

Do I detect someone's bearing a torch for Mabel Pines?

PRIVATE VOICE

[smallmediumatlarge]

I'm sorry, who's this?

video;

[rideme]

The fuck is that wig? You going bald already, kid?

[smallmediumatlarge]

I'm sorry, my video cut out a little just now! What was that?

VIDEO.

[jyuced]

[ He watches the video all the way through, leaning close to the screen before he idly starts trying to push back his hair from his forehead in such a way that it stands up the way Gideon's is. Unsuccessfully, of course. ]

Hey, how do you do that with your hair?? It's awesome, mine won't do that at all!

[ Now with that important question out of the way... what had Gideon been saying? ]

Right, tips! Definitely don't get kidnapped or eat in the McDonald's ballpits -- those are pretty important. Is that helpful?

[smallmediumatlarge]

"Don't get kidnapped" is always good advice.

video;

[bassriff]

[... yeah she's been scrolling responses and her hackles are up.]

Keep away from the Pines, you little creep. [IF IT'S THEIR WORD AGAINST THIS RANDO'S... yeah. yeah]

[smallmediumatlarge]

Sorry, have we met?

video;

[doubleblind]

[Cosima hasn't seen anyone get quite such an unwelcome welcome before now.]

You're looking for tips? I'd try to avoid people from your home until whatever all this is settles down.

[smallmediumatlarge]

Here's hopin' it will.

video

[justimom]

[ Even Samara is confused by this tiny little strange human. ] It is a very unfortunate and tense time for newcomers. Perhaps a good tip for the time being would be to not involve yourself too deeply.

[smallmediumatlarge]

I'll remember that. I'm not tryin' to make trouble.

[video]

[newwaver]

[s q u i n t s]

Is that my flat?

[It's like the universe wants him to stop putting dicks in his paintings.]

PERMANENT PRIVATE VIDEO

[smallmediumatlarge]

I went ahead and moved on in, hope you don't mind. New and all, didn't know what was what!